Big Brother Premiere Recap: Eight Is the Loneliest Number

Big Brother, you’re such a tease.

Rather than kick off the summer staple’s 16th season with an introduction of all 16 houseguests, CBS instead chose to divide the premiere into two nights, dedicating each hour to eight contestants at a time.

But by the end of the hour, it seems that only meeting half of this summer’s characters was for the best, as the first batch may have been one of the loudest and wackiest in BB history. (Not to be confused with the most bigoted and discriminatory group, a title that last year’s cast continues to hold. Congrats!)

RELATED  CBS’ Fall Schedule Kicks Off With Thursday Night Football; 2-1/2 Men, Elementary Premiere in Late October

Before we review the finer points of Big Brother 16‘s opening hour, let’s meet the first group of contestants, each one touting a superlative:

Girl could not get through a sentence without mentioning how much she wanted to violate fellow housemate Cody. “We were this close earlier,” she whines in the Diary Room. Charming. Other notable personality traits: Counting on her fingers, overuse of the word “like.”

The school groundskeeper — who could easily pass for a Duck Dynasty cast member — seems oblivious to what’s going on around him, but he’s really a superfan who’s seen every episode of every season. Watch out for this one, HGs!

Being Ariana Grande’s half-brother instantly makes the YouTube personality a target, but even without sharing that tidbit, Frankie requires all eyes on him at all times. If and when Frankie is ever ousted, I imagine the other houseguests will gladly be showing him the door.

Although the (stunningly beautiful) model gravitates toward the women of the house, she seems the type to make friends with anyone, without ever making any bold moves.

No, it’s not the makeup artist’s blue hair that makes her a shoo-in for controversy. It’s probably her super-liberal, “Left wing is the best wing” stance that will cause her to clash with her fellow housemates.

The former pro soccer player has some experience playing the field, and it looks like he’ll be putting it to good use in the house this summer. But I do appreciate a contestant who can play up his soccer skills at the height of World Cup hysteria. Smooth move, Cody.

No, it’s not because he’s ripped! …. Fine, yes, it’s because he’s ripped. But Devin, who cites his love for his 2-year-old daughter as the reason he’ll win Big Brother, also comes off as shrewd and calculating.

She’s a precocious nursing student — who looks exactly like Taylor Swift circa the “You Belong With Me” music video — and based on her Diary Room confessionals, she has no interest in ruffling feathers this summer.

RELATED  Meet the Big Brother 16 Cast!

Only a few hours go by in the house before these eight contestants are scheming, and they agree to stay by each other’s side even after the second group of contestants joins them. (Ha! How sweet.) They dub their new alliance the “Crazy Eights,” and it’s a truly adorable sight to behold — until minutes later, when two sub-alliances form. On the guys’ side, Donny confides to Devin that he’s seen every episode ever of the show, which is all Devin needs to trust the dude, and they form the “Double Ds.” For the ladies, it’s the perfect time to form a no-boys-allowed alliance, and the four dub themselves “El Cuatro.” And poor, sweet Nicole confesses that she has no idea what “El Cuatro” means in English. This is going to be a fun summer.

Julie Chen — looking radiant as always — calls the HGs to the backyard, where they compete in the first Head of Household competition of the season. The endurance challenge, which requires contestants to stay upright on a rotating log, comes down to Amber and Frankie, but Frankie is the ultimate victor after Amber (intelligently) throws the event. Looks like your HoH bedroom won’t have any family photos, Frankie!

Later, Julie informs the HGs that there will be two Heads of Household this season — but by the end of each week, only one will be left standing. As an additional twist (to which the contestants aren’t privy), viewers at home will be able to create a secret alliance called Team America, whose three members will carry out covert missions throughout the summer. The first member of Team America is…. going to be revealed Thursday night. Again with the teasing!

What did you think of the Big Brother 16 premiere? Which contestants stood out to you? And who do you think will join Team America? Hit the comments!

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

  1. abz says:

    Is horniness a requirement to be chosen as a contestant on BB? It’s like they all think BB is some sort of Bachelor, dating-type show and they’re just there for the showmances. I seriously can’t stand these showmances. They ruin they show. They produced Brenchel and McCranda and so many more annoying ones that I can’t think of right now. I wish that they’d make one season where all the contestants are married which would hopefully lessen the possibility of any showmances and just focus on them playing the game.
    I found Frankie and Paola the most annoying and I have a feeling they will continue to be that way. Donny was pretty funny to watch. Cody’s dad’s kisses goodbye felt like they went on way too long. I wonder how they will introduce the second batch of contestants to the house. Will they lock the current 8 away for a couple hours while they allow the new batch to get introduced to the house or maybe they have them do the competition and get to know each other in a different house before they let them in BB house?

    • reboot2099 says:

      I miss the early seasons of Big Brother when there were older and/or married people, not everybody was a model or an athlete and had 6 packs!

      The other 8 better be really great, because I hate the first 8s! What a bunch of superficial show-offs! Sure, there was always a number of them in BB, but this year is looking to be the worst for this.

      The only one I like is Donny. He better not turn into a floater! Everybody seems to like him and he’s kinda quiet, so it can be, super-fan or not.

      And I might be in the minority, but I don’t think Frankie is that annoying compared to the others. Sure, he drooled over the soccer guy, but for the most part, he’s there to play (while publicising himself, of course), not to hook up like 3/4 of those people!

      Doesn’t they watch BB at all? When was having a showmance was a good idea? Why the heck would someone go there and try to hook up as soon as possible? Most of them admitted even before entering the house that they wanted a showmance? What happened to people who want to play to win?

      • James says:

        BB4 were all twenty-thirty somethings with the exception of Jack.

      • Mike says:

        Frankie is easily the most annoying Big Brother contestant in the last few seasons. NOBODY cares that his sister is Ariana Grande, nobody cares that he does “voices” all the time. He’s riding the coattails of a mediocre celebrity sister, and his persona only makes people hate him.

    • webly3 says:

      McCranda broke up. lol

    • Arie says:

      Cody’s dad first kissed him on the lips and then all over his face and neck. I’m gay but that was disturbing to me.

  2. wrstlgirl says:

    Not sure about the Team America thing. That would suck getting into the Big Brother house and not be able to play your own game.

  3. jj says:

    the team america thing seems kind of confusing, also what will this first batch of HGs do while the other group does their HOH? Just sit around and watch?

  4. Ian says:

    I was in love with Donny by the end of the hour, but I got to say, what a blah cast :( I don’t really see the other 7 so far making for great gameplay and television.
    They’re trying too hard with the casting, just like how they’ve got a bit crazy with the twists.
    CANNOT STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND Frankie. Ariana, your brother is just waaaaaaaaaaaay too much.

  5. Mike says:

    How does the team America twist work and do we get to vote for something?

    • James says:

      The show will open voting lines on their website asking viewers questions that could impact the game. So far, they revealed America will choose three HG’s to form a secret alliance and perform secret tasks, basically America’s Players in threes.

      Let’s just see how it will all plays out.

  6. XtremeCota says:

    Did you guys know Frank is Ariana Grande’s brother? He NEVER mentioned it.

    • wrstlgirl says:

      Sure he did. At least three times that I can remember. Or maybe you’re joking :-)

    • bt says:

      who is Ariana Grande?

      • Butters says:

        Thank you, I had to look her up and I still have no clue who she is.

        • Big Brother Fan says:

          But she’s one of THE MOST famous people in the world according to Frankie, one of THE MOST famous!

          • dan says:

            My wife said “who?” and I said “I’ve heard of her, but ask our 16-year-old daughter how famous she really is.” I actually didn’t mind Frankie’s over the top personality, but I think he’ll wear thin with the houseguests if he remains “on” all the time. I like the girl with blue hair (Joey?). I was wondering if the other eight houseguests are also doing the same thing (introductions, picking rooms, doing HOH competition) in a replica house on the CBS lot, and then they’ll be merged together. But that would be really expensive for CBS to set up so I’m not sure how they’ll integrate the other eight. Cody’s dad couldn’t stop kissing him goodbye. I don’t have a problem kissing my teenage son, but Cody’s family reminded me of the SNL skit where the family kisses too much. Kind of funny. Should be an interesting summer!

      • Annatree says:

        Have no idea 💡 who she is either and refuse to Google her

    • Sam says:

      I actually had no idea who she was up until 4 days ago so for him to be like “of course Paola is going to know who Ariana Grande is” was confusing to me.

  7. GS says:

    I am just glad this group is not like last years. I missed my guilty summer pleasure because of the idiots they cast and I’m ready for a good season this year. I actually like all of them EXCEPT Frankie and Paola. He’s so over the top that it’s beyond ridiculous and I don’t give a rat’s behind that he’s trying to ride his sister’s coattails. Paola is just stupid. Counting on her fingers to figure out the difference between 27 and 23…just no words for that ignorance. I honestly wish I never had to hear the word showmance ever, ever again.

    My favorite is Donny because he’s a NC boy and I’ve got to root for the home town guy. Not to mention he’ll be the only one not hooking up or acting stupid. The all girl alliance will last about a week. Amber was shooting daggers at Joey when Devin started flirting with her. Women just can’t get past jealousy to be loyal to other women in this game and I’m a woman.

    Looking forward to seeing the next batch tonight. I get why they are all young and single. Most normal people just can’t leave their lives for 3 months to play the game. I’d love to but just no way possible with a husband, kid, job, mortgage, etc.

    • Sam says:

      those aren’t really excuses. Helen has a husband, kids etc and left to do BB. I remember one of the winners of the first season of “love in the wild” said they gave them a little bit of money once cast to pay their bills. Of course people who can afford to take that leave are more likely to apply.

  8. Lisa Benwitz says:

    I don’t pretend to know any of these people from the one-hour “hi, this is my stereotype” introductions we were shown, but the casting decisions continue to confound me. I understand that the show has always done well this way, and there has to be a narrative, blah blah blah, but I was really disappointed with this cast–not only with how shallow they seemed to be, but how “on” they are all the time–most of them (most notably, Frankie and Nicole) seemed to be all image, all put on for the cameras. I know the cast usually starts out self-conscious around the cameras and eventually show themselves as time goes on, but some of these “characters” just struck me as more ridiculous than usual. At least they all managed to be nice to each other (or that’s what we were shown.) I found it tough to find someone to root for–hopefully the next eight will be more promising.

  9. Jax&Juice's Girl says:

    This is my 1st time watching BB and so far I like it even though they changed the rules. When Frankie mentioned that his sister is Ariana Grande I was like WTF?…….I love her song w/Iggy Azalea but I don’t like her……Frank is a bit to much but oh well.

  10. John Moshier says:

    to many alliances at the beginning thell never last

  11. chrisnine11 says:

    Did I understand correctly that while there will be 2 HOH’s and each HOH will choose 2 nominees for eviction that only 1 HOH would remain? (Or did I dream that?) Meaning there will be some type of competition between the two at some point? AND if that is the case does that mean the losing HOH’s nom’s will also come down leaving the other 2 nom’s to fight for POV (or whatever they do this year) which could then be replaced by the losing HOH?

  12. Sam says:

    This Big Brother 16 is by far the worst one ever. These people had a hard time graduating from high school, it shows. A lot of self centered meat heads this time. That big dummy with the muscles is a bully. He thinks he is the cats meow and runs everything. I can’t stand to watch anymore and I will not. Big Brother went and got the stupidest people they could and ruined the show!