Grey's Anatomy Meredith's Love Life

Grey's Anatomy Boss Shonda Rhimes: I'm 'Ambivalent' About Meredith's Post-McDreamy Love Life

Shonda Rhimes and Meredith Grey are on the same page when it comes to moving on (romantically) after Derek.

“I am as ambivalent as the character is, because I guess I’m Meredith’s stand-in,” the Grey’s Anatomy creator told TVLine when asked about the possibility of the character falling in love again. “The death of Derek was incredibly hard, so I feel like we’re going to see how it goes. We’re going to watch it evolve and take it as it comes.”

In a previous interview, Rhimes seemed to shoot down speculation that incoming cast member Martin Henderson (Off the Map) is being groomed as Mer’s new McDreamy, insisting that she’s still figuring out “what I’m doing with [him].” As it is, romance in general is “not the focus” for the still-grieving widow in Season 12.

“Meredith is single and she is living this life that she’s never thought she’d be living again,” noted Rhimes. “She’s living in a house with her sisters. She’s surrounded by women who are dating and having a whole life and she’s not interested in all that. [Meredith is] starting to wonder, ‘Is there a second life here?'”

What do you think? Given that roughly 15 months have passed since McDreamy transitioned to the big TV cemetery in the sky, is it time for Mer to dip her toe back in the dating waters? Vote in the poll below and then elaborate in the comments!

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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35 Comments
  1. Azerty says:

    I will watch Grey’s until it ends and maybe (maybe) I will enjoy it if the storylines and the character’s growth is done right but there is no way they can top 10 years of MerDer.

  2. Sara says:

    Noooo, too soon. Meredith should focus on her work and a mother to her 3 kids, one of them is just a newborn, dating should be far from her mind.
    And after 11 years of a couple like Meredith and Derek, iconic.. it’s hard to sell a new romance. Thinking about it make me sick.

    • Prish says:

      It is natural for happily married people to remarry happily. And I don’t think time has anything to do with it . They’ve had a good experience and know the ropes. But fan expectations might have something to do with it, though. Haha

    • Rook says:

      I agree, it is way way way to soon. Cristina went all of season 4 without a love interest after Burke left her in season 3 and the didn’t even get married or have kids. So I think they should follow this and maybe think of giving her a love interest next season.

  3. Leah says:

    No, no. no.

    Derek was the one, the love of her life. Their relationship started from the first second of the show, and it was focused ever since. So many epic moments happened, and we saw their beautiful journey with their ups and downs, they were one of TV’s popular couples, still are, they are still the talk even after 5 months of that crap happened, and Ellen and Patrick were magic together. I can’t picture Meredith [and MD’s children] with someone else.

    • Lisa says:

      So she never gets to have another romantic relationship for the rest of her life? That seems rather pathetic. I’m not saying rush out and get married again, but I also don’t think there’s such a thing as “the one” and after that person is gone you can’t find happiness with anyone else.

      • Martina says:

        They were really written to be made for one another. And while reading things about Derek beeing “the one” for Meredith, I always think of one phrase that was said in some series, maybe it even was Grey’s or Private Practice itself: “You know what comes after the one? The next ONE.”
        If this would be a real situation, I would want Meredith to be happy again. But since we are talking about a TV show and because of all the stuff they have been through, I personally feel a new romance for Meredith is just way to soon. Maybe next season, or even the season after next season I might feel comfortable by watching Meredith with someone else. But now? No. I would really HATE the idea. I know it’s just TV and this sounds kinda odd and silly, but somehow, many people are grieving about Derek. Still.

  4. Tom says:

    I’m more looking forward to seeing Meredith’s evolution as a widow, single working mother, and now the house mother to her two sisters. I’m not interested in seeing her date just yet because I think she deserves some time on screen where her life isn’t defined by a man. I certainly miss Derek and the Mer/Der relationship but that’s not fueling my desire to see her alone for a bit.

  5. Alia says:

    I think ABC MUST end this show. Derek should be alive even if he is living in Washington.

    • morgust says:

      Get over it, he wanted to go part time and the writers did not want him to; it was work…it had nothing to do with the character. Would you have been happier if he stayed in Washington she cheated and they got divorced?

    • Well that’s not going to happen. Relax.

    • Miss Rozie says:

      @Alia … me thinks that ABC is enjoying all the money that is rolling in so I don’t think ABC will be cancelling Grey’s any season too soon. As long as Grey’s has totally acceptable ratings, they won’t be. Shonda owns Thursday night. And Alia, even fictional tv characters die. I would prefer that Grey’s show the viewers just how a widow, with three young children, moves on with her/their lives after her husband’s/their father’s death without thinking she has to have a man in her life. No she doesn’t – she doesn’t have to have a man, I am hoping when the time comes, it’s because Meredith wants a man in her life. I know, you know, that “have to’s” & “want to’s” are two totally different things.

  6. graze says:

    If they expect Grey’s fans to move on from the disastrous decision and method in which they killed of McDreamy why in the world do they keep showing his picture with Meredith in a poll about her moving on? Subliminal much…

    • graze says:

      Meant to post, it HAS NOT been 15 months for viewers since Derek’s death, just about 4 months. So if Rhimes decided not to show the grieving process good for her but viewers are still 11 months behind the curve in terms of where we think Meredith is. Not because anyone is refusing to move on but the writing for this arc was horrible plot point driven, it never made us feel Meredith’s journey, just told us about it.

      We’re still in 2015, Grey’s is in 2016?

  7. Eh, isn’t Ellen just going to leave at the end of the year when her contract is up?

    • Azerty says:

      I thought she said she was in as long as Shonda wanted to write for Meredith? I might be wrong though. But if she is, that’s a shame they didn’t make it work with Patrick Dempsey even for a guest spot;, to be able to let MerDer leave the show together, happy and both alive…

    • H says:

      Why would she leave this moneymaker? There isn’t any other role (not a significant one) after this one. She’s milking the network for all they’ve got for these last seasons then she’ll be a producer.
      Besides, now that Dempsey’s gone, as soon as her contract is up she will ask and get Mariska Hargitay kind of money (they were together in the Taylor Swift video so they’re probably exchanging tips). I wonder who will be fired this time: my pick is Jo, Alex will be with Maggie.

  8. Mika02 says:

    I really feel like this is the best sory to tell. I loved how we see Mer take over for Baliey’s Anatomy Class. I want to see her shine as a mother and as a Career women. She needs to stand alone for a while.

  9. Shaun says:

    Even though it’s been a year time wise,for the fans only a few months.See if things improve in the story.

  10. JoeTV says:

    Shonda Rhimes, the queen of PR. All summer she’s been playing damage control and now throughout the season she will continue to suggest until by the end of the season she will have replace Derek completely and she’ll be happy

    • H says:

      She may be the Queen of PR but she handled this thing terribly. Clearly Dempsey refused to film some scenes, and that’s why we got some weird episodes with Meredith being ok with her husband kissing another woman, then attacking Amelia for no reason whatsoever just so that she would tell her the fordshadowing “you don’t know what is like to have the love of your life die in your arms”, which is something anyone who watched Private Practice knows is not true. The result is that now half of the fandom hates a character she needs everyone to like. Big Mess Shonda.

  11. Rinti says:

    I think is too soon for a romantic interest, but maybe towards the end of the season some sparks could appear between her and the new doctor.

  12. Tony says:

    While I agree Derek was an important part of the show and the MerDer coupling, this is why I personally invest in characters first and couples second. I also watch daytime soaps and the obsession over couples has made it near impossible to have decent conversations with some fans.

    As far as Meredith goes, I am looking forward to seeing her go it alone at least this season. By next season, it should be (who knows) a good two years show timeline wise and for TV, that is more than enough time to give a character previously in a popular pairing a new romance.

  13. Melissa labelle says:

    I think you should keep April and jackison together they make a great couple

  14. Rose says:

    I think there should be someone handsome that loves meridaths kids and makes her laugh

  15. EM says:

    Maybe 15 months for show but 4 months for fans. Too soon. Focus on career and kids. Maybe a hint of love interest in winter finale or season finale.

  16. Cheryl says:

    I am liking how the story is going, where Mer is focused on her career and her children, it is appropriate at the moment but come mid-season enough time has passed. You can’t expect her to live the life of a nun or like her mother did. Yes, the loss of McDreamy was sad since he has been around since the beginning but like real life, you can move on, you don’t forget the father of your children but you don’t have to be a nun either. As Christina put it, Mer is the sun and she needs to shine in all aspects of her life. She doesn’t need to bed hop like she use to but she doesn’t need to marry the first guy she does anything with. The story line and pace are right on, it is time for her to focus on everything else besides her love life and she can vicariously live through her sisters for the moment without the drama.

  17. Nancy says:

    where are the children this is the 2nd week and no kids where are they

  18. aph1976 says:

    I’m sure eventually Meredith will have a romance but for now she should focus on her kids and her career.Then maybe when she least expect it she finds a new love.I don’t think anything will ever compare to what Meredith had with Derek but that doesn’t mean she can’t date ever again.Plus Derek may not want her to be alone for the rest of her life.

  19. toria says:

    I just hope it’s all a dream, and that Derek is alive and well… but until then, where are the kids for crying out loud.. I miss Derek and meredith together, pls show me the kids, if mer is suppose to be transitioning shouldn’t her kids be in it as well. Duh

  20. Ange Wood says:

    We saw her with Finn, so it is possible for her to find love again. Many fans need to realize that there are many levels of love, the love she has with someone will never compare to the love she had with Derek. She deserves to be happy and to be with someone. If this is her last season, lets see her find someone

    • Linda says:

      If this is her last season its mine. She needs to find someone new. Of course he won’t be exactly like Derek . They spent a lot of time apart which was wasted time that they missed out on. I was in love with their chemistry. She deserves a new love who loves her and her kids and stands behind her. I don’t believe it is noble to not be happy. She needs to find happiness and it would be good for her kids who I would like to see again. Men seek love so quickly after a breakup or death. Woman need passion and compassion too. She should at least get her feet wet. I not talking about tequila sex. Maybe casual dating to test the water. To say she may never find love and she may be leaving the show are very disturbing. I really hope they are just rumors.

  21. Chayo says:

    It’s time to get rid of Karev and his whiny girlfriend, they are so irritating. I don’t know why he hasn’t been fired considering all the major mistakes he has made.

  22. Winona says:

    I believe that Meredith should eventually dip back into the relationship pool but not now. She needs to figure out who grown alone Meredith is first as well as what she wants in a boyfriend. She also has 3 children that she does not need to be subjective to men.
    We can explore how she handles mother hood as a single parent first. She should still have memories of McDreamy as well if not for her for the kids.