Carol Lynley (The Poseidon Adventure) was rumored to have the part back in 1991. And theories swirled over the years suggesting Agent Cooper’s trusty Gal Friday might just be a figment of his imagination. But in Sunday’s Twin Peaks, the one and only “Diane” was finally revealed to be none other than Laura Dern. (Nifty that she played his Girl Friday back in Blue Velvet too, huh?) A satisfying moment 27 years in the making (even if most of us guessed and hoped it was coming). Now, Albert (who found her in Max Von’s Bar in Philadelphia – did that neon sign look vaguely Bang Bang Bar-ish to you?) can take Diane Evans (and her Peggy Lee wig) down to the prison in South Dakota to verify that Evil Coop is not her man.
IN VEGAS | Meanwhile, Dougie is still stumbling through life very much like Peter Seller’s in Being There: magically guided by mysterious and benevolent forces. Some tiny green sparkles prompt him to doodle steps and ladders all over his work case files. And guess what? It reveals a shocking insurance scam to his boss! Dougie just can’t lose. Also, his wife Janey-E (Naomi Watts in her strongest episode yet) came into her own this week, showing some big brass balls while shutting down the thugs blackmailing her family. By the way, that book Dougie’s son is reading in bed? That would be the Hardy Boys mystery The Secret of the Old Mill. How many more of these little nods to the town of Twin Peaks does Dougie need to wake up? (And he needs to wake up soon, and not die! Or so says the One Armed Man in another vision).
And remember Lorraine from last week? The lady texting on her Blackberry to the metal box/wad of black gum in Argentina? Well, she got stabbed to death by a little person with an ice pick (in a hilariously awful and gruesome moment). Yes, Ike “the Spike” Stadtler is taking over the Dougie hit job (thanks to a menacing envelope courtesy of Patrick Fischler from Part 1. Note that he is working on an IBM ThinkPad. Again, this may be the year 2003). And now that the police have found Dougie’s license plate on the roof of “119!” Drug Lady’s house, it shouldn’t be too long before all the various forces start to close in.
IN TWIN PEAKS | Curiously, Carl Rodd (Harry Dean Stanton) seems to have moved his Fat Trout trailer park (home of BOB victim Teresa Banks in Fire Walk With Me) from Deer Meadow, Oregon to Twin Peaks, Washington. Continuity be damned! Carl takes a ride into town with a man named Mickey who tells us about his (presumed) wife Linda, a war veteran who now requires a wheelchair. Yes, the real world is ever encroaching upon Twin Peaks (Janey-E identifies herself as a “99 percent-er” and tells us “We are living in a dark, dark age”). And Linda is just the first military casualty we will learn about this week. But is she the Linda of “Richard and Linda” that the Giant warned us about? Most likely yes.
Speaking of Richard, the young Mr. Horne is up to his ears in a drug running operation with Red (Balthazar Getty), the good looking dude making eyes at Shelly back at the Road House in Part 2. (And he is totally Shelly’s type. He’s Leo 2.0, only his corvette is black not red. Maybe that’s why his name is Red?) Red scares Richard with his dime magic trick. And then, flying high in a drug fueled rage, Richard horrifically runs down and kills a small child (note that this takes place in the very same intersection where Laura Palmer and her father Leland once had a scary and memorable run in with the One Armed Man). Carl Rodd (who was relaxing with RR-To-Go coffee near Laura’s gazebo) attends to the shell-shocked mother (is she possibly Donna??) and watches as the child’s soul rises up to the sky. (BTW how did Carl manage to bring his No. 6 electrical pole with him from Oregon?). Richard is witnessed fleeing the accident scene by Miriam, a schoolteacher. She was just leaving the RR Diner after chatting over pie (that she can’t afford) with Shelly and Heidi (Heidi!), still giggling exactly like she did in the pilot and final episode of season 2.
Sadly, the other military casualty we learn about is Sheriff Frank Truman’s son, whose (presumed PTSD) suicide seems have driven his wife Doris over the edge (the ongoing theme of parents losing their children hangs over Twin Peaks like a sad, dark cloud this week). However, on the brighter side, Hawk seems to have indeed found the “something that is missing” (thanks to the Indians on his dime and his toilet stall door). And yes, I’m certain what he has found are the crucial pages torn from Laura Palmer’s secret diary. You will remember that when Annie (PLEASE TELL US HOW AND WHERE SHE IS!) appeared in Laura’s bed in Fire Walk With Me, she told Laura to write the following in her diary “The Good Dale is in the lodge and can’t leave.” That important entry is about to crack this case wide open. But who hid those pages in the stall door? Evil Coop? Briggs? The One Armed Man?
RANDOM THOUGHTS | Perhaps Dougie’s story is taking place back in 2003. And perhaps that key Jade mailed back to the Great Northern will be found by Audrey and her 12 year old son, Richard. That gives him time to grow up, and time for her to build a glass box trap for her one true love. Additionally, all these references to King Arthur: Lancelot Court, Merlin and Guinevere streets… are there perhaps 12 streets named in this same vein, and do they surround the electrical socket/plug that New Cooper got birthed from? Is that plug yet another doorway or portal to the Black Lodge/Red Room? Just like the circle of sycamore trees in Twin Peaks’ own Glastonbury Grove? Glastonbury Grove takes its name from the burial place of, yes, King Arthur. And I’m betting that we’re soon to learn of other portals around the world — all somehow linked to the Knights of the Round Table. But why?!
And hello Twin Peaks traffic light! You were missed! (Written by M.T. Wentz)