Wednesday’s Broad City season finale managed to achieve the impossible: It actually made us wish a flight was longer.
Unfortunately, our in-flight entertainment came, as it so often does, at Abbi and Ilana’s expense. Just when they finally managed to get seats next to each other — there was still one guy between them, but he was actually dead, so it’s all good — Abbi was visited by the Period Fairy. But because her Drew Barrymore-approved bag had been checked against its will, she found herself up a creek without a
A true frond ’til the ond, Ilana briefly sidelined her dreams of entering the mohel high club (brilliant!) to help Abbi scrounge up a replacement, and while I was actually really impressed with Ilana’s finished product — a DIY tampon made from a pita, a yamaka and some string, among other “materials” — Abbi wasn’t about to shove an arts and crafts project up her princess. (Also, forget what I said about Ilana putting her dreams aside; she totally went down on Seth Green in the bathroom mid-project.)
Mission: Tampossible took a hopeful turn when the Broads noticed a box of tampons in first class, but like the Road Runner about to step into one of Wile E. Coyote’s traps, they knew it couldn’t possibly be that easy. Their retrieval plan was as follows: Abbi would create a distraction of her choosing, while Ilana Jason Bourne’d her way into First Class to score the goods. But like all simple plans — including the band of the same name — it didn’t take long for this one to completely fall apart.
For starters, the paranoid flight attendants — played to absolute perfection by black-ish‘s Tracee Ellis Ross and Marry Me‘s Tymberlee Hill — mistook the girls’ period talk (“Any second, there’s going to be an explosion, and there’s going to be blood, like, everywhere”) for a bomb threat, causing them to spring into action and ‘save the day.’
In less time than it would take you to run through a verse of that timeless classic “I Sh*t,” the
ladies suspected terrorists found themselves in an interrogation room, and realized that a few of their off-handed comments — including referring to Abbi’s bag as “the bomb” — may have made them look somewhat suspicious.
But this is Broad City where, like Sesame Street, there are no real consequences for anyone’s actions, so the girls were abruptly released and returned home. They may not have made it to the Holy Land, but at least they learned a valuable lesson: the true meaning of the word “cockpit.”
Your thoughts on Broad City‘s season ender? Grade the episode below, then drop a comment with your full review.