So I’m going to flat-out say it: Shelby’s parents on Quantico are terrible, no-good monster people.
What kind of mother or father would leave their child to assume they’d been killed in one of the worst terrorist attacks in American history? And then, once they pop up alive again, shake said child down for thousands?
Horrible (yet pretty) people, that’s who. And they pull another terrible con on Shelby in this week’s episode. Another question related to the hour: If Alex and Drew have sex in the forest, does anyone care? Read on for the highlights of “Care.”
GOOD WILL HUNTING | The episode opens in the present timeline, with Simon and Ryan sharing a drink and some information at a bar. “Alex would kill me if she knew I was here,” Simon says, but of course that’s not true: Just after Simon lets Ryan know that Alex needs him to track down an asset the CIA is holding, he surreptitiously slips a tracker into Agent Booth’s pocket.
Meanwhile, Alex and Simon hatch a plan to extract this asset — read: captive — the CIA’s been holding (and whom the terrorist has requested) and question him or her in relation to the terrorist’s plot/whatever was stolen from the lab at Columbia during Claire Haas’ event. And they do so, posing as Ryan and Nimah to get past the safe house’s guards. Once inside, they discover that the “asset” is… Will?! And he’s not looking good.
IN THE DRIVER’S SEAT | Turns out, Will has been in custody for seven months; he doesn’t even know about the terrorist attacks in New York. And before you can say “incredibly poor choice of guards,” Alex and Simon have absconded with their former classmate… and bring him TO HER APARTMENT?! Wouldn’t that be the logical first place for anyone to look for her/them? Anyway, Will informs his friends that he was in custody because he cracked the NSA’s encryption software and is keeping all of the military codes in his head.
So when the terrorist calls with meet-up coordinates, Alex tells Will to run — but he says he’s going to go. “I will help you stop this terrorist from the inside,” he tells Alex. “Just think of me as your personal Trojan horse.” When the baddie also requests that Simon join Will during the handover, Simon tells Alex everything will be all right. “I’ve come back from the dead before, right?” he jokes grimly.
So they get in the terrorist’s car, and he/she/it commands Alex to hand over the phone to the driver, because her stint as a patsy is done. But when the window rolls down, the driver is… Shelby?!
SHELBY’S PERSONAL HELL-BY | Which is interesting, because Ms. Wyatt is the focus of this episode’s Quantico-era timeline, too. On a class trip to Canada — in which Liam tasks pairs of NATs with getting back to campus without the aid of passports or IDs — Caleb arranges for Shelby to meet with her fugitive parents.
Her folks’ explanation for faking their deaths in the Sept. 11 terror attacks: Their company sold weapons software to the Taliban, unwittingly arming the enemy. When they realized, “we had to make a decision fast. We changed the flight manifest — we made that software, too,” Shelby’s dad tells her. They say they couldn’t send for her because they didn’t want her to have a life on the run, and it makes me afraid for the future security of our country that Shelby so thoroughly eats up all their BS.
But Caleb is skeptical, and when he plants a phone in their hotel room, he catches them discussing whether or not Shelby ” took the bait” and making plans to grab the first flight after their daughter transfers them more money. So Caleb intercepts, informing the Wyatts that he’ll give them $5 million if they agree not to talk to their daughter ever again. So they skip out of Canada, and Shelby (in my opinion) far too eagerly accepts her boyfriend’s explanation that there was a security threat that made them run. As the episode ends, she’s happily (and obliviously) looking for another foreign locale where they can have a second family reunion.
BORDER BLUES | Elsewhere up north, Alex and Drew partner up and wind up traveling over land to get back to Quantico. That means they end up in a cabin in the woods, and given the sexy music in the background and the fire in the fireplace, is it any wonder they end up doing the deed?
In other NATs-trying-to-get-back-to-school news: Will and Iris drop trou in order to get deported on indecency charges (which doesn’t work) and Raina and Nimah do a twin switcheroo to bypass Customs and Immigration (which does work — and saves Miranda’s program for them, too).
Now it’s your turn. What did you think of the episode? Sound off in the comments!