Cecily Strong's Best Zingers From the White House Correspondents' Dinner

Live! From the basement ballroom of the Washington Hilton! It’s… Saturday night’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner, at which President Barack Obama and Saturday Night Live cast member Cecily Strong each fired shots at both sides of the aisle.

Was Cecily a Strong host of the annual gathering of press, politicos and celebs? Did POTUS hold his own, with his opening remarks? At the risk of a thumb cramp, I scrolled through the cable guide until I found C-SPAN and watched for you, singling out these zingers.

CECILY STRONG

“Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I’m going to go easy on you people. I’m going to go easy on you people because my brain is smaller.”

“[Previous WHCD host] Joel McHale proved that speaking at this dinner is an amazing opportunity that can take you from starring on a show on NBC all the way to starring on that same show on Yahoo.”

“Since I’m only a comedian, I’m not going try to tell you politicians how to do politics. That’d be like you guys trying to tell me what to do with my body. Can you imagine?”

“It’s great to be here at the Washington Hilton… is something a prostitute might say to a congressman.”

“I don’t want to be too hard on [the Secret Service], because they’re the only law enforcement agency in the country that will get in trouble if a black man gets shot.”

“[Fox News] is all hot blonde ladies and old dudes. Every show looks like a party scene from Weekend at Bernie’s.

“Even SNL got criticized for making fun of ISIS. If anyone is guilty of taking ISIS too lightly it’s… [nods head in Obama’s direction]… him.”

“What can I say about Brian Williams…. Nothing, because I work for NBC.”

“This year a representative from Hobby Lobby said they didn’t want to pay for employees’ health care if it covered things like contraceptives — which is weird because all i asked him is, ‘What aisle is the yarn in?'”

[To the assembled press] “Raise your right hand and repeat after me: ‘I solemnly swear… to not talk about Hillary [Clinton]’s appearance… because that is not journalism.'” [Cue much applause]

[Then, regarding Clinton’s White House bid] “I would never blindly endorse a candidate I don’t play on SNL.”

PRESIDENT OBAMABarack Obama Addresses White House Correspondents Dinner

“After the midterm elections, my advisers asked me if I have a bucket list. And I said, ‘Well, I have something that rhymes with bucket list.'”

“Today, thanks to Obamacare, you don’t have to worry about losing your insurance if you lose your job. You’re welcome, Senate Democrats.”

“[Representative] Michelle Bachmann actually predicted that I would bring about the biblical End of Days. Now that’s a legacy…. Lincoln, Washington, they didn’t do that.”

“[Vice President Joe Biden and I] have gotten so close, in some places in Indiana they won’t serve us pizza anymore.”

[Regarding the black-ish cast in attendance] “I have to give ABC fair warning — being black-ish only makes you popular for so long. Trust me.”

“… and Donald Trump is here. Still.”

Closing out Obama’s speech, Anger Translator Keegan-Michael Key, on Hillary Clinton’s aggressive campaign fundraising: “Khaleesi is coming to Westeros!”

How do you think Cecily Strong did as this year’s WHCD host?

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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13 Comments
  1. m3rcnate says:

    Obama was fantastic, Cecily was alright, she had some great zingers though. It sucks that her longest joke (photos of her and the handsome senator guy who resigned) was also her worst joke, you can’t bail out of that because its a bit, so she had to finish it.
    .
    Best joke of the night? Hilary being Khaleesi and how shes going to be coming to Westeros lmao. Brilliant.
    Best non joke of the night? Obama’s rant about Climate Change. If theres anything i want to see the President and leaders of the world rant angrily about and swear and get furious about, its how we are permanently harming and destroying the one planet we got. All cause companies and people and politicians want more money.

  2. Mike says:

    I think she did pretty good. It’s hard to do this type of thing and she is more or an actress by nature.

  3. Mike says:

    I think she did pretty good. It’s hard to do this type of thing and she is more of an actress by nature.

  4. Mr. Tran K says:

    I always dreamed of Cecily Strong. In my opinion, one of the most beautiful funny women I have ever seen and she’s smokin’ HOT.

  5. LoloCurray says:

    I thought Cecily had better, more envople pushing jokes (minus the Instagram bit, but that’s something she couldnt bail on) but I think the room brought down how she was perceived all together.

  6. Definitely a solid enough bit. Not my fave (I really loved Ferguson’s bit from 2008 and Meyers from 2011 or whenever it was just to name a couple) but definitely serviceable with some nice zingers.

  7. Sally McLinn says:

    Obama as always was too funny.

  8. cuius says:

    Given there are some good lines there, can we assume she didn’t use the SNL script-writers?

  9. Angela says:

    “Since I’m only a comedian, I’m not going try to tell you politicians how to do politics. That’d be like you guys trying to tell me what to do with my body. Can you imagine?”
    Haha, yes. NICE :D. I also liked Obama’s lines about Michelle Bachmann and Joe Biden, and Cecily’s joke about Joel McHale :p.
    Looks like some pretty good zingers here on both ends!

  10. LOL says:

    Cecily was great loved her jokes

  11. Cecily Strong addressing problems between police and the Black community was appropriate. The relationship between law enforcement and the Black community is impacted by broad sociological forces. Police, including the FBI and other federal law enforcement, are a reflection of greater society.

    Consider, for example, Black men having an unemployment rate of 10.4, Black women 8.9, White men 4.8, and White women 4.1. The text messages of law enforcement officers that exposed racial hatred toward African Americans would surely be found on the cell phones of corporate executives.

    As our culture values or devalues Black Americans, so follows police.

  12. NJMark says:

    Instead of “speaking truth to power” (as it was said Cole-burt did w/Bush, even though he was really just an ass), Cecily gave it a tongue bath.