Sharknado 2: The 13 Best Worst Lines and 13 Fishiest Leaps of Logic

Sharknado 2 Review Best QuotesAs Syfy’s Sharknado 2: The Second One touched down on Wednesday, the forecast called for world-class groaners and epic leaps of logic. And yet… the sequel was a whale of a good time, easily doubling the entertainment quotient of the original shlockfest.

RELATED Syfy Orders Third Sharknado Movie

In fact, rather than wait for TVLine’s 20-ish Questions or Quotes of the Week columns, Sharknado 2 deserves a standalone showcase for its very “best” worst dialogue and the WTF? moments that dropped like flaming hammerheads. Review our picks, then share your own!

THE 13 BEST BAD LINES….

“Two of my friends were killed, I almost destroyed Los Angeles…. And oh yeah, I almost got eaten by a shark. How much ‘fun’ do you think that was?”

“I had the chicken.”
“Chicken? I was going to try the fish.”
(One of multiple Robert Hays/Airplane! references, for the uninitiated.)

“It’s like he knew who I was….”
“If he did, he would have run the other way.”

“If anyone’s playing me in a movie, it’s gonna be me.”

“There are no chainsaws in New York! You need to go to Long Island, or New Jersey. You don’t wanna go to New Jersey.” (Hey now!)

“Hooooooly sh… ark.”

“Frogger!”

“You know what you just did, don’t you? Jumped the shark.”

“This is a twister with teeth.”

“We are talking about shark-falling rates of two inches-per-hour….”

“Because flaming sharks!”

“I know you’re scared. I’m scared, too. They’re sharks, they’re scary.”

“Let the fireworks begin!”

“You’re not going to need this again.”

… AND 13 FISHY PLOT POINTSSharknado 2 Review Best Quotes

How would Fin, a surfer/bar owner, know the first thing about piloting a 747?

Did April really randomly fire a gun at the sharks outside as she used one arm to dangle from a hole in the side of an airborne plane?

If that flight was presumably a redeye (touching down at dusk), why were the lights on, and no one was sleeping?

When Fin’s sister called him at the hospital, how did he know she was at the Statue of Liberty? (That was never established, yet he urged her to get back on the ferry.) Also, who says “copy that” during a phone call? A surfer-turned-747 pilot?)

Why was there a guy in a parka at a July baseball game, if the freakishly cold weather was unanticipated?

Why the random sewer alligator attack? (Is Alligatornado coming?)

How did Judd Hirsch know where (and when) to pick up Fin & Co. off the 7 train? Does he drive the same magic cab as on Taxi Brooklyn?

How was the irregularly shaped head of Lady Liberty able to roll for so long, and so straight a path, on a flat street?

Where did the wave of water that rushed down the hospital stairs toward April come from?

Why would a taxi driver have a tow rope with him (if he has one at all) in the front seat, and not in the trunk?

If Fin knew he only had eight minutes to do whatever the hell he had planned for the Empire State Building’s freon tanks, why did he stop to deliver a long speech to the crowd?

Is throwing started chainsaws into a tornado really such a good idea?

And last but not least: How did Fin retrieve a far bigger piece of April’s arm than she had originally lost?

Sharknado 3 is coming: At the 5:45 mark, Ian Ziering
and Tara Reid discuss where it should take place:

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

36 Comments
  1. Steph says:

    This is Sharknado…logic has nothing to do with it.

  2. Joni says:

    Got a kick of the the kiss “for luck” before using the tow rope to safety. – Star Wars.

    • Simon Jester says:

      And also “there’s something on the wing” from the William Shatner Twilight Zone episode. (Surprised they didn’t put Shatner on the plane with Robert Hays and Wil Wheaton, actually.)

  3. Jamie says:

    Thanks for adding the (Hey now!).

  4. Courtney says:

    The only thing I can explain (and it’s far-fetched, I know) is that Fin could know about Planes ’cause of his son. Who was in flight school or whatever in the first movie, and then controlled the Helicopter.

    • bababooey says:

      Or he learned to fly just in case of another sharknado. That way he would have a way to get up high enough to throw propane tanks into the twister!

  5. The sewer-gator was a nod to Alligator (1980)

  6. Tara Reid managed to shoot a shark that then bit off her hand while hanging out a crashing 747 and yet in the hospital *still* had a perfect face of makeup. It’s Sharknado, I’m not looking for logic of any kind.

    • B says:

      Lol I noticed the skankup, and actually thought it looked like one side had extra red crap on her cheek to hide the bruises of a slapping.

  7. Drew says:

    If it was summer why were there no leaves on the trees in the cab window’s reflection?

    • edlowthegreat says:

      I don’t think it was.summer. All the main characters had on coats and sweaters

      • Nick says:

        The people on the news specifically said it was July when talking about the rain.

        • Cephus says:

          In an interview, they said that it was filmed in the winter and the temperature was never above 10 degrees. They were all freezing the whole time they were filming.

  8. TvPeong says:

    Right?!?!? Why was that guy throwing started chainsaws into the air?

  9. Kelly Ludwig says:

    I actually thought the BEST comment of all was the “Meals on Wheels” tweet after the bike girl was eaten!

    This really is one of the experiences that social media and the sharing of the experience enhanced. Watching bad disaster movies was a family experience growing up & being able to do the same thing with my kids is a way for continue the family tradition. I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m actually grateful for this series. Not many movies can have multiple generations of my family laughing so hard they’re crying :p Thank you SyFy!

    • Nick says:

      Those twitter accounts were all made up. If you look up any of the twitter handles they’re all inactive except for the comments that made the show. Pure marketing.

  10. I have to add that I have never seen a baseball stadium where there were NO cars at all in the drive around it.

  11. Ash says:

    These are all really valid plot holes and everything – but seriously, is no on going to mention the scene where Fin is fighting a shark on the subway, and the doors close trapping him inside as the subway train continues to start and drive away? Everyone freaks out screaming…and then Fin literally just walks up next to them with zero explanation?

  12. Ann says:

    No, here’s the question. So a shark can bite off the end of a subway car and derail a whole train — but you can stop him with a souvenir wooden baseball bat?

  13. Scott Johnston says:

    “How would Fin, a surfer/bar owner, know the first thing about piloting a 747?”

    Actually Ithought that was answered … within FACTUAL ☺ terms of the movie. They had a few refrences to games like Frogger, so I was thinking, “Flight Simulator!”

    “If that flight was presumably a redeye (touching down at dusk), why were the lights on, and no one was sleeping?”

    YOU sleep throught chaos! (are you reated to my mom?)

    “When Fin’s sister called him at the hospital, how did he know she was at the Statue of Liberty? (That was never established, yet he urged her to get back on the ferry.) Also, who says “copy that” during a phone call? A surfer-turned-747 pilot?)”

    A Gamer!

    “Why the random sewer alligator attack? (Is Alligatornado coming?)”

    A play on the urban myth terer are alligators in ew York Sewage system. Uh, you know this wasa cheesy fick, right?

    “How did Judd Hirsch know where (and when) to pick up Fin & Co. off the 7 train? Does he drive the same magic cab as on Taxi Brooklyn?”

    At least with the closed captins, Finn asked him that. Judd said he kew things as a long term cabbie. Now it might have been dropped from the audion (“Who I was….” in the CC’s was “who SHE was…” captions are made off the script and often times changes and ad-libs can be missed.

    “How was the irregularly shaped head of Lady Liberty able to roll for so long, and so straight a path, on a flat street?”

    Simple … “Mess with New York … heads will roll!’ ☻

    “If Fin knew he only had eight minutes to do whatever the hell he had planned for the Empire State Building’s freon tanks, why did he stop to deliver a long speech to the crowd?”

    A bit of grand-standing and to rile people up to fight.

    “How did Fin retrieve a far bigger piece of April’s arm than she had originally lost?”

    And HOW did it come out in such perfect condition? It’d have been digested by that point!

    My favorite FACT learned? A great white shark will eat an aliigator in the New York sewage system!

    • Scott Johnston says:

      ugh – sorry for typos I didn’t catch (multi disabled … there were a ton I *did* catch)
      .
      note a period between lines … I fergets-like

  14. John Wall says:

    How high was Tara Reid during that interview?

  15. Maggie Prior says:

    How was there no blood on the chainsaw when he cut that shark in half?

  16. Pam Gray says:

    Thank you scyfy for such a ridiculous & illogical movie! I have to watch it again to catch what I missed from laughing so hard.

    • Scott Johnston says:

      Ditto! Glad I DVR’ed and started ½ an hour late so I could zap through ads. I didn’t delete after because during I was laughing so hard, I knew I’d re-watch. :-)

  17. Bonnie says:

    Easily the best line, “Don’t mess with a Mets fan on the 7 train.”

  18. Greg says:

    The one thing I thought after the first one was that you could tell Tara Reid hated getting wet or dirty. In part 2, I noticed that she never got wet and after they save New York and she reunites with Fin, she barely has any physical contact with a blood covered Ian Ziering.

    At my house we got all excited about the thought the sharks were going to eat the Yankees. But, no such luck.

  19. angie says:

    I want to know why, when the hotel was flooding and sharks were swimming up the stairs…when they went out onto the fire escape and went down…there was no water at the street level….???

  20. Buck says:

    Finally, something besides zombies! Wait, how about zombie-sharks for Sharknado 3? They still kill you, but only eat your brain?

  21. Ben says:

    OMG – Tara’s not too F’D Up is she, I thought she went to rehab! Movie’s a hoot as the first one

  22. bababooey says:

    “How did Fin retrieve a far bigger piece of April’s arm than she had originally lost?”
    I believe Fin actually took out a random arm belonging to someone else, but mistook it for April’s arm because it also happened to be holding a gun. When she saw him take a ring off it and give it to her, April decided not to correct him.

  23. Steve says:

    how could you miss my favorite lines:
    1. the next time you offer to lend a hand, don’t be so literal about it
    2. no one wants to be eaten. but i’ve been eaten!

  24. chicagorob1 says:

    The author’s skepticism is lauded, but here are some possible answers to many of his questions. The others not listed here were highly improbable…

    How would Fin, a surfer/bar owner, know the first thing about piloting a 747? He obviously didn’t, it was a mess of a landing

    Did April really randomly fire a gun at the sharks outside as she used one arm to dangle from a hole in the side of an airborne plane? It was through an open door, the hole was much further back. Now that that correction has been established, isn’t it plausible that she would be able to shoot one handed while holding on?

    If that flight was presumably a redeye (touching down at dusk), why were the lights on, and no one was sleeping? They were all too excited to have the original Sharknado guy on the flight with them.

    Why was there a guy in a parka at a July baseball game, if the freakishly cold weather was unanticipated? The Mets have all kinds of weird fans, “Parka Guy” is nothing compared to some of the other freaks with season tickets.

    Why the random sewer alligator attack? (Is Alligatornado coming?) What’s more terrifying? A legendary NY sewer alligator attacking or a giant shark attacking the alligator on it’s way to munching down on you?

    How did Judd Hirsch know where (and when) to pick up Fin & Co. off the 7 train? Does he drive the same magic cab as on Taxi Brooklyn? He said he knew the New York like the back of his hand. What, are you calling him a liar?

    How was the irregularly shaped head of Lady Liberty able to roll for so long, and so straight a path, on a flat street? It’s copper, which easily bends and buckles when striking cold asphalt, everyone knows that from science class.

    Where did the wave of water that rushed down the hospital stairs toward April come from? From the giant hydrotherapy pools in the physical therapy wing on the roof.

    Why would a taxi driver have a tow rope with him (if he has one at all) in the front seat, and not in the trunk? He likes to be prepared. The rope sits on the front seat, right next to the life raft, satellite phone and garlic infused wooden stakes.

  25. Wonderful website, just lately been searching forever and a day for tips on the best rattan furniture for our home and in our
    patio. This website sincerely helpedgreat blog some great info here

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 2,660 other followers