American Idol Top 3 Results Recap: Heeeee's Running Out the Doo-ooo-ooo-oor!

AMERICAN IDOL top 3 results recapTears are as vital to American Idol Top 3 results night as FCC-taunting hemlines are to J.Lo’s sense of self(ie).

Indeed, the opportunity to travel back to contestants’ hometowns, to see the misty water-colored memories of the way they were (six months ago), provides endless cross-promotional opportunities with Kleenex or Puffs that have yet to be explored by the House That Is Currently Ruled By Candice Flippin’ Glover.

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Tonight, however, was notable for the lack of waterworks in the packages of Alex Preston and Caleb Johnson. Granted, the former contestant had to sacrifice a third of his screentime to lovingly filmed closeups of Jenny From the Block, while the latter’s video clips mostly focused on goofy hijinks with a little brother named Houston.

(“Did they even show Caleb’s parents? Maybe there’s a sad story there,” texted my pure-hearted mother, not realizing that reality TV producers feed off tragic footage like hyenas gnawing on half-consumed carcasses.)

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At least Jena Irene’s family delivered the goods — her grandma weeping before the soulful diva had even pulled into the driveway, then declaring, “I’m gonna be worse than I am now!” Jena’s Grandpa, meanwhile, got me choked up as he dabbed the corners of his eyes with a crumpled tissue. Also: Can I get a T-shirt that simply says #TeamJena’sBrother?

Nope, nobody will ever surpass Elliott Yamin’s mom for Most Stirring Contestant Relative, but it’s always nice to see ’em try.

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So what else was on the agenda with the results show expanding to an hour tonight? We had Season 10 champ Scott McCreery singing about sunshine and flip-flops. There was Ryan Seacrest delightedly introducing us to his puppy Georgia (“We didn’t have an oopsie! Yes!”). And we even endured some Obvious-isms from Randy Jackson — “Whoever goes home tonight, they will have missed the finale,” declared the Dawg, who also expects the sun to rise in the morning and his local McDonald’s to have a hot McGriddle on the menu prior to 11a.m. (Runner-up for Worst Randy Quote? “It all comes down to Alex, Caleb and Jena.” Really? But I thought Kenzie Hall was still waiting for her chance to sing!)

Without further sarcasm, here’s how the results played out:

FIRST ONE SENT TO THE FINALE
Jena Irene

LEFT IN LIMBO (THOUGH NOT NECESSARILY BOTTOM 2)
Alex Preston
Caleb Johnson

Before dish eliminations, do you know that despite the production offering umpteen reminders of Caleb’s bronchitis and ailing vocal cord on Wednesday, he wasn’t the only contestant struggling with health issues? Consider this Tweet:

Anyhow, results…

ELIMINATED
Alex Preston, who left on a very high note thanks to a lilting performance of his lovely self-penned track “Fairytales.”

And with that, it’s your turn…

What did you think of Top 3 results night? Did the right two singers make the finale, or are you aghast at the results? Sound off in the comments! And for all my reality TV-related news, interviews and recaps, follow me on Twitter @MichaelSlezakTV!

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