Quotes Of The Week: Last Man Standing, Zoey's Playlist, Bridgerton And More

Turns out 2021 is a bit of a mess, after all — but at least the TV is good!

To show our appreciation for the comforting constant that is television, we've compiled another batch of Quotes of the Week, recognizing standout dialogue from broadcast, cable and streaming series.

This time around, we've got a memorably chilly reception for The View's Meghan McCain as she returns from maternity leave, a two-word declaration on The Rookie that still packs a punch, Hell's Kitchen's unforgettable advice for cooking chicken properly, and the Brokeback Mountain-themed wedding ceremony we never knew we wanted, courtesy of The Great North.

Also featured in this week's roundup: double doses of Last Man Standing (read all about that Home Improvement crossover), Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (read premiere post mortem) and NCIS: Los Angeles, plus sound bites from The Simpsons, Mr. Mayor, The Challenge and more shows.

Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!

"You missed me so much, Joy. You missed me so much when I was on maternity leave. You missed fighting with me."

"I did not. I did not miss you. Zero."

Joy Behar makes her feelings about conservative panelist Meghan McCain abundantly clear

"I want to base the wedding on my favorite romantic movie: Brokeback Mountain. It'll be in a giant tent, everybody's wearing jean jackets, there will be a lot of loose sheep everywhere, and no one will be quitting anyone. And I'm inviting Jake Gyllenhaal, but if he can't make it, hopefully Maggie Gyllenhaal. If she can't make it, then hopefully her husband, Peter Sarsgaard. And if he can't make it, then Alexander Skarsgard."

Honeybee Shaw (voiced by Dulcé Sloan) is a bride who knows what she wants, and we support her

"Now put on something bright and uplifting because this whole black thing—"

"Doesn't work for me, does it?"

"No, honey. You look like a sad Emma Stone Halloween costume."

Mo (Alex Newell) encourages Zoey (Jane Levy) to add some color to her wardrobe

"I like your sweater. It's cute that you shop at Etsy."

Joan (Lauren Graham) piles on, albeit inadvertently

"Do! Not! Touch! My! Dad!"

Desi (Levy Tran) punctuates her message with a quinet of punches

"See? You will look so very lovely with it pinned up next season."

"No, I will look like every other young lady, except less graceful and more bad-tempered."

Eloise (Claudia Jessie) has no interest in being the belle of any ball

"Let us wander as aimlessly as the plots of the four upcoming Avatar sequels... I can only assume."

Only Comic Book Guy (voiced by Hank Azaria) could segue from romantic to nerdy this quickly without breaking a sweat

"This is amazing, for sure. This is probably one of the coolest places I've ever been to in my life... sucks that I have to be here with you, but..."

"I was going to say, minus you, this place is great!"

New partners (and frenemies) Devin and Tori take a moment to appreciate an Icelandic cave... sort of

"I quit."

Wes (Shawn Ashmore) ends his brief stint as Nolan's lawyer, when his client volunteers for a harebrained sting

"CSU said that you had scrubbed the back seat and vacuumed the carpet. Now why would you do that?"

"I've always been kind of a clean freak."

"Oh, you're definitely a freak."

Danny (Donnie Wahlberg) grills a suspect, but squeaky clean, ride-share driver

"I think I could play Santa Claus."

The quarantine beard gets to Scott Calvin — er, Mike Baxter's (Tim Allen) head

"I've always found it easier to open up to the top half of another man's face."

Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor (Tim Allen) alludes to his many conversations with Home Improvement neighbor Wilson

"Remember, election is not marriage. You're not trying to find 'the one.' It's like dating. It's not going to be perfect or fun or good or fulfilling, but you do it so your mom can brag at church."

Tommy (Mike Cabellon), keeping it all too real with Mikaela

"Have the man-boys filled you in on the whole mortal enemy, karate dojo, battling-for-the-soul-of-the-Valley thing?"

"Wait... you both have karate dojos? How's that going?"

Amanda (Courtney Henggeler) jabs Daniel and Johnny, while getting Ali (Elisabeth Shue) up to speed

"What's wrong? It's been a whole three seconds and I'm not thinking of an excuse to go inside."

"Yeah. We just got a call from Gemma's sister, Brittany. She's back in town and she's on her way over."

"I thought you told me she was in jail again."

"She was. But she got out early. This time without having to dress up like a guard."

"You know, that was really impressive — making a mustache out of a mop."

Calvin (Cedric the Entertainer) and Dave (Max Greenfield) on the unwelcome return of Dave's sister-in-law, Brittany

"Honey, is it just me, or do you need a cigarette?"

Phil (Leslie Jordan) senses the heat between Randi and Daniel

"You can't play dominoes, Mr. Callen, without making a few trips to the boneyard."

Nell (Renée Felice Smith) practices The Art of Being Hetty

"And Callen, if this is about the kidney, you can have one of mine, no problem."

"[Chuckles] I think there'd be plenty of problems with that."

Arkady (Vyto Ruginis) has lived hard, and Callen (Chris O'Donnell) knows it

"Kori, if there's one tip you could give Kenneth on how to cook chicken beautifully, what would it be?"

"Just take your time, you know. Make love to your food."

"Make love to it, don't [bleep] it."

Gordon Ramsay grills Kenneth over a scorched chicken

"This is where he works, according to his MySpace page."

"This guy has a MySpace page? Of all the things you have told me about this guy, him having a MySpace page is the creepiest."

Toby (Chris Sullivan) weighs in one final time before Kate (Chrissy Metz) goes to confront her abusive ex-boyfriend