Allow us to kick off (weak pun intended) your Super Bowl Sunday with a look back at TV’s best Quotes of the Week.
In the list below, we’ve gathered nearly 20 of television’s most memorable sound bites from the past seven days, including moments both scripted and unscripted from broadcast, cable and streaming series.
This time around, we’ve got Ellie’s reaction to pre-apocalyptic canned cuisine on The Last of Us, a major misunderstanding about literature on Ghosts, and a zinger from The Real Housewives of New Jersey‘s Teresa Giudice that doesn’t land quite the way she intended.
Also featured in this week’s roundup: double doses of Abbott Elementary, The Watchful Eye and NCIS, plus a triple dose of Harley Quinn‘s Valentine’s Day special (read our recap and grade the episode!).
Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!
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THE LAST OF US
Image Credit: HBO screenshot “What am I even eating?”
“That is 20-year-old Chef Boyardee ravioli.”
“That guy is good.”
“I actually agree.”
Joel (Pedro Pascal) introduces Ellie (Bella Ramsey) to a pre-apocalypse delight
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THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY
Image Credit: Bravo screenshot “No! I’m being honest. I’m being raw as… as a cucumber? How do you say, raw as a cucumber? Alright, whatever. I’m being so freakin’ real right now!”
After 13 seasons, Teresa Giudice continues to just miss the mark as far as idioms go
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AMERICAN AUTO
Image Credit: NBC screenshot “This is not making us look good. ‘Costner Leaves Payne in the Ashes.’ But he’s also about to star in a Broadway adaptation of The Cutting Edge. I wanna see that!”
Us too, Cyrus (Michael Benjamin Washington)!
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ABBOTT ELEMENTARY
Image Credit: ABC screenshot “She’s impossible to get off the phone with. Every call is like the length between Netflix seasons. It’s like I don’t remember what happened on the last season of Stranger Things. That was 10 years ago.”
Janine (Quinta Brunson) embellishes how chatty her sister is
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ABBOTT ELEMENTARY (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: ABC screenshot “Ava has been in my last three classes. Either this is some time-intensive prank, or I am getting fired… for teaching Black history. Flew too close to the sun, like an anti-racist Icarus.”
Jacob (Chris Perfetti) worries when Ava sits in on his Black History Month lessons
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THE FLASH
Image Credit: The CW screenshot “…now you need to prove you’re the new Big Rogue on Campus, blah blah blahhhhh.”
Time-looping Barry (Grant Gustin) fast-forwards through Captain Boomerang’s villain speech
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GHOSTS
Image Credit: CBS screenshot “Have you read The Iliad?”
“What did you say about an oily lad? Describe him! Slowly!”
The horny, Puritan ghost (Chris Eckert) at the property next door mishears Isaac (Brandon Scott Jones)
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HARLEY QUINN: A VERY PROBLEMATIC VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “Favorite TV Shows: Later seasons of The Office?!”
“What the f—k?”
Some things on Bane’s dating profile cannot be unseen!
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HARLEY QUINN: A VERY PROBLEMATIC VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot (2) “Clayface, this is serious. If Ian Somerhalder could continue filming Season 5 of Vampire Diaries after his break-up with Nina Dobrev, you can do this. You can do it.”
“It’s true. That was some of his finest work.”
Ivy (voiced by Lake Bell) digs deep to rally Clayface (Alan Tudyk)
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HARLEY QUINN: A VERY PROBLEMATIC VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “I mean, what is horny if not love persevering?”
DC’s Clayface-as-Brett Goldstein (voiced by Goldstein) kinda-sorta steals a line from Marvel’s Vision
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VANDERPUMP RULES
Image Credit: Bravo screenshot “She laid it all out, and it made perfect sense. I can’t probably give you the specifics because I was so upset, I wasn’t really listening. But also, I don’t want to ask her again because one of the reasons she broke up with me is because I’m not a good listener.”
OK, yeah, we kind of understand now why Tom Schwartz got dumped by his wife Katie
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NOT DEAD YET
Image Credit: ABC screenshot “I know, she’s a little rich and weird and she thinks Old Navy is a branch of the military.”
Sam (Hannah Simone) describes newspaper boss Lexi
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THE WATCHFUL EYE
Image Credit: Freeform screenshot “I’m a Gen Z yenta. A zenta.”
Elena (Mariel Molino), after she plays matchmaker for Elliot
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THE WATCHFUL EYE (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: Freeform screenshot “What did I tell you about burning the Diptyque? Display only.”
Do not mess with Tory’s (Amy Acker) fancy candles
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FIRE COUNTRY
Image Credit: Paramount+ screenshot “I look like the Mattress King.”
“You are the mattress king, of this house.”
Sharon (Diane Farr) once again reminds us why she and Vince (Billy Burke) are flirty couple goals
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THE DAILY SHOW
Image Credit: Comedy Central screenshot “Well, if that is not the pot calling the kettle QAnon.”
Guest host Chelsea Handler plays a video of Marjorie Taylor Greene saying you can’t believe everything you read on Twitter
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NCIS
Image Credit: CBS screenshot (2) “Sir, the only reason why I parked in your parking spot on Friday is because I knew you weren’t here.”
“You parked in my spot on Friday?”
“No.”
Jess (Katrina Law) guesses wrong about why Director Vance (Rocky Carroll) summoned her
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NCIS (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: CBS screenshot (2) “He can’t see in here?”
“No.”
“Then why is he staring right at me?”
“That’s his resting psycho face.”
Jess (Katrina Law) schools movie star Chloe Marlene (Tania Raymonde) on two-way glass
