Quotes Of The Week For Nov. 17, 2019

We've rounded up the best TV quotes from Nov. 17 through Nov. 23, 2019. Scroll through our gallery of zingers, bon mots and one-liners below, then tell us if we missed any of your favorite lines from this week's television!

riverdale-spring-thaw-salmon-quote

RIVERDALE

"Whilst the rest of Riverdale sits down to give thanks, we'll be dumping Bedford's body in Sweet Water River, just before it freezes over. By the time spring thaw comes around, the salmon will have gobbled up his eyes!" 

Cheryl (Madelaine Petsch) has her own unique way of celebrating Thanksgiving

the-good-place-duval-ditchwater-quote

THE GOOD PLACE

"Here, I saved this from my funeral. It's called a Duval Ditchwater. It's Midori, Coffeemate and ditch water." 

Jason (Manny Jacinto) is a sweet guy, but not much of a bartender

emergence-say-that-quote

EMERGENCE

"What do you want me to say? You want me to say that everything's OK now?"

"I mean, yeah, if that's an option, I'd love that. Say that!"

Jo (Allison Tolman), hoping to put off a difficult talk with Alex (Donald Faison)

the-mandalorian-get-one-of-those-quote

THE MANDALORIAN

"I gotta get one of those."

Mando (Pedro Pascal) admires his colleague's jetpack

evil-never-happen-again-quote

EVIL

"You know why this moment's special?"

"Why?"

"Because it'll never happen again."

Married Kristen (Katja Herbers) enjoys a chemically euphoric — and slightly dirty — dance with priest-in-training David (Mike Colter)

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titans-cut-out-eye-quote

TITANS

"I'm gonna cut out your eye."

"Funny."

"You're too pretty, anyway."

"F—k you."

Slade (Esai Morales) takes the saying, "You have your father's eyes" to the extreme

the-flash-price-is-right-rules-quote

THE FLASH

"I'll bid on your stupid laptop..."

"Five hundred million dollars!"

"Five hundred million... and one dollars! Price Is Right rules."

"Drunk" Allen Barry (Grant Gustin) crashes an illicit auction

the-flash-mortal-kombat-quote

THE FLASH (Bonus Quote!)

"I love Mortal Kombat."

Barry (Grant Gustin) "mistakes" UltraViolet for... well, any number of masked female MK badasses

family-guy-hercules-disney-quote

FAMILY GUY

"And now that we're owned by Disney, we can have Hercules here! ... No? They won't let us use him? Then what was the point of this whole merger? ... Well, who can we use? ... Launchpad McQuack? No. ... You know what? I am exhausted."  

Peter (Seth MacFarlane) was really counting on that special guest star for the show's ancient Greece episode

survivor-representation-matters-quote

SURVIVOR

"I love you, but the other day, two African-Americans wore the [immunity] necklace at the same time, and at our tribal, there was no mention of it at all. It doesn't happen very often. Women typically are the first voted out, minorities are the second. So to have two minorities, on the same day, in a double challenge, wear the necklace... that's just something that I feel like... representation matters, and I feel like my future nieces and nephews and my future other family members need to see that, because we're here, too."

Missy, pointing out to host Jeff Probst his oversight (just before being voted out)

legacies-muppet-treasure-island-quote

LEGACIES

"Josie and Landon didn't have sex, which means you might want to still plant your flag on Muppet Treasure Island."

Even in the face of certain doom, Lizzie (Jenny Boyd) manages to come up with the best nicknames for Landon

DEBBIE ALLEN, JESSE WILLIAMS, BARRETT DOSS

GREY'S ANATOMY

"I'm Victoria Hughes, ma'am. Station 19."

"Station 19... what is that, a TV channel?"

Firefighter Vic's (Barrett Doss) introduction to beau Jackson's mom Catherine (Debbie Allen) could have gone better

greys-anatomy-so-many-lawsuits-quote

GREY'S ANATOMY (Bonus Quote!)

"Why don't you just tell him to leave you alone?"

"He's my boss, and I broke his heart, and I feel guilty."

"Wow, so many lawsuits in one explanation."

Maggie (Kelly McCreary) and Teddy's (Kim Raver) discussion about Koracick shocks Helm (Jaicy Elliot)

perfect-harmony-soap-sterilizes-it-quote

PERFECT HARMONY

"Didn't you tell me Georgia threw that [mug] in the trash...?"

[Ginny shrugs] "The alcohol sterilizes it."

"Soap. Soap sterilizes it."

Adams (Tymberlee Hill) gives Ginny (Anna Camp) a "dirty" look

black-lightning-light-socket-quote

BLACK LIGHTNING

"No witty comeback? Did somebody wake up on the wrong side of the light socket this morning?"

Tobias (Marvin Jones III) fails to get a rise out of Black Lightning's missus

ncis-nugget-creeper-quote

NCIS

"I'm sorry, what again...? Some sort of secret killer band society?"

"Yeah, it sounds a lot worse when you say it out loud."

"And you heard this from the 'nugget creeper'?"

"That really sounds bad when you say it out loud."

McGee (Sean Murray) and Bishop (Emily Wickersham) work one wacky case

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