Curb Your Enthusiasm Recap: Don't You Dare Call a Scone a 'Fancy Muffin'

Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 10 Episode 3

It’s safe to say Curb Your Enthusiasm‘s Larry David has a… unique perspective on social politics. On Sunday’s episode, he can’t help himself as he fights for his favorite pastry, becomes smitten over artificial fruit and is annoyed by garbage cans. Leave it to Larry.

At the top, Larry visits a former New York City pastry chef because he’s scouting out scones for his coffee shop. Upon his first bite of the man’s delicious work, Larry gives it a “Prettaaay, prettaaay good!” review.

Larry’s lawyer tells him he needs to donate to a charity of Alice’s choice in order to make the sexual harassment suit go away. He also has to make a speech. Larry blithely bites into an apple — excuse me, a decorative apple — which causes the lawyer to think Larry isn’t taking the case seriously. Larry throws the apple away, but the lawyer is now bothered that Larry used an unlined receptacle to dispose of the half-eaten fruit. “You have fruit that’s not for eating, you have garbage that’s not for garbage and you have a bathroom that nobody can use. It’s unbelievable!” retorts Larry.

At Jeff and Susie’s, Larry still has fruit on the mind. He grabs an apple from their fruit bowl, but Susie tells him it’s artificial fruit. The apple looks so realistic, Larry asks Susie to text him the number of who made it. He’s also miffed that Jeff and Susie won’t touch the scone he brought.

Larry then brings his scones to Andy, who hates them because they’re too dry. Larry takes it as a personal offense and tells him to never come to his store. Larry throws the scone in the garbage, causing Andy and his wife to bug out. They don’t use the garbage can; rather, the can is there to indicate that they know how to throw things out (whatever that means).

Larry feeds his scones to Richard Lewis next, who doesn’t like the messy hardness of the food. “Who needs all this s—t when eating a snack?” says Richard. Larry says that Funkhouser would love it, but the two mention he’s in China (the actor, Bob Einstein, died last year). They get into a fight about who’s paying for their next lunch; so many “F yous” are exchanged, it makes you wonder why’re they’re even friends. “Take your scones and get the hell out of here,” says Richard, who angrily throws a pastry at Larry on his way out.

Larry goes to the restaurant to prepay with his credit card for the meal, but the host refuses to take it. Larry learns a waiter’s aunt died, so Larry goes to the wake and hands the card off to a grieving Francisco. Surely enough, Richard walks in with the same idea and the two wind up wrestling under the casket.

Larry follows up with Jeff about the scone. Jeff tried it but calls it a “fancy muffin,” which Larry doesn’t handle well. “That’s like saying roast beef is chicken!” exclaims Larry. While at the movies, they see an ad for Ted Danson’s latest movie, and Larry gets so heated he beats the ad with a broom while accidentally ramming Jeff in the mouth.

While kicking it with Leon at home, Leon grabs an apple and bites down hard. Before Larry can warn him that the apple is artificial fruit, Leon chips a tooth.

At the charity event, Laverne Cox hesitates to hug Larry because she has a cold. He’s impressed by her consideration! She’s enthused that a white male is taking part in the charity and being present to the issue. The time has come for Larry to give his speech, and after Laverne introduces him, she goes in to hug him, but Larry, remembering her cold, ducks the hug. The entire room erupts with boos and throws food at him.

After the event goes sideways, Alice isn’t happy with the settlement. She wants a personal monetary settlement now, but Larry balks. His lawyer then offers him an apple, which pleases Larry to no end. He bites into it before the lawyer can stop him and he chips his two front teeth. The apple was artificial fruit!

Larry and Leon watch a game together with their chipped teeth, and the lisping that ensues is all sorts of ridiculous. Larry’s credit card company calls and says there’s been fraudulent charges on his card… the same card he gave Francisco to hold on to! He goes to confront him along with Leon and Jeff, but because of their missing teeth and Jeff’s banged-up face, the family thinks the lisps are ridiculing their Spanish dialect. Larry and Co. are quickly escorted out and tossed into garbage cans.

At the meeting with Alice, Larry offers her a scone while the two wait for an elevator. The scone is so dry she winds up choking. Just as he’s about to administer the Heimlich, he hesitates, not knowing where it’s appropriate to touch her. As the elevator doors swing open, Alice collapses to the ground.

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