Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Reunion, Part 2 Recap: Dog Fight

Yes, the infamous Puppygate scandal was thoroughly reexamined on this week’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion… but the ladies were fighting like cats and dogs about other things entirely, too.

Tuesday’s Part 2 picks up mid-inquiry, with Dorit sharing her hurt feelings about Teddi targeting her. Teddi admits her actions were “stupid,” but Andy presses Dorit on whether she regrets not just returning Lucy Lucy Apple Juice to Vanderpump Dogs. Dorit insists she thought the dog was going to “a loving home,” but Camille gleefully twists the knife by asking again why she didn’t just bring her back. Kyle defends Dorit, of course (anything to slam Lisa Vanderpump), emphasizing that she did not hand the dog over to a “kill shelter” and saying all pet shelters are equipped to euthanize — no, actually, Kyle, no-kill shelters are not, but anyway — and Dorit says Lucy was “never in danger” of being put down. Well, that’s a relief.

Teddi is put on the defensive, though, when Andy plays tape of her declaring she never lies… and then evidence of her lying. “Weren’t you still lying?” he pointedly asks, adding, “You’re lying about lying.” (Damn, Andy!) Camille is enjoying all of this, by the way. They get into LVP’s employee John Blizzard, and whether she should’ve fired him for his Puppygate role. “She couldn’t fire him because he was doing what he was told to do,” Kyle sniffs. “He has a lot of information.” Hmmm… well, that’s a very loaded statement, isn’t it? We also get a quick rundown of each housewife’s legal woes, because they’re all being sued by someone, apparently… and also each housewife’s body image issues and plastic surgery secrets? Boy, Andy’s really scraping the bottom of the barrel for topics this year, huh?

Next, Kyle and Teddi’s newly minted BFF status is confirmed by a montage that shows Kyle dressing Teddi up, doing her makeup for her… your basic Single White Female situation. Camille chimes in to call their friendship “creepy” and say that Teddi has been “up Kyle’s ass” all season long. She just wants to be able to talk to her old friend Kyle without Teddi butting in… and of course, Teddi butts in when she mentions this. Those two don’t seem to like each other very much, but Camille has more than enough bitchiness to share with the entire class. She goes after Denise for that lunch she had with Brandi Glanville, which Camille thinks was the straw that broke LVP’s back. Brandi is Vanderpump’s “archenemy,” Camille says, adding that Lisa was devastated by seeing her on screen laughing it up with a fellow housewife.

But Camille, weren’t you just making fun of Lisa’s bad breath and receding gums earlier this season? (“That was a joke! And you all laughed!”) This leads into a montage of Camille talking behind people’s backs and then backpedaling on it, and the ladies all gang up on her about her two-facedness. Camille thinks they all do the same thing, though, and calls Dorit “such a fake” while she’s at it. When Dorit asks why she was even invited to her wedding, then, Camille snaps back: “That was production… I didn’t want to invite [of you] ladies to my wedding.” (Andy, as Bravo’s corporate representative, is obliged to remind Camille, “You have power over yourself.”) But Camille really flies off the handle, calling them all out for “trashing” her after her wedding and labeling them all “the Witches of Eastwick.” (Catchy!)

She goes back at Denise about their dumb argument over Teddi snubbing Camille’s daughter, and about Denise cursing in front of her kids. Camille is practically foaming at the mouth, and Denise advises her: “You need to go take a second, because this is not good.” Camille decides this is all “a set-up” and storms off the set. A befuddled Denise is left asking: “Is she on something?… She’s f–king nuts.” Next time, in Part 3: Camille tearfully says she’s “really hurt by you ladies.” But they all keep yelling at her anyway.

Got thoughts on tonight’s RHOBH reunion? Drop ’em in a comment below.