Quotes Of The Week: Big Brother, Boys, Amber Ruffin Show, Emmys And More

Autumn is officially upon us — and with it, slowly but surely (and strangely, in 2020), comes fall television.

Though the fourth week of September is usually a little busier for your DVRs than this one was, we've still got 10 memorable gems to revisit in our latest Quotes of the Week compilation.

This time around, we've got Jason Bateman's attempt to dethrone Paul Rudd as Hollywood's Most Ageless Celebrity, a Ted Lasso character who would fit right in on Sesame Street, two noteworthy punchlines from The Amber Ruffin Show's first outing and the best Big Brother eviction speech of the summer — thus far, at least.

Also featured in this week's roundup: sound bites from The Haves and the Have Nots and The Boys, plus an Emmys joke from host Jimmy Kimmel that was scandalous in every sense of the word.

Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!

"Look at you in there, looking like a brunette Oscar the Grouch."

Team captain Roy bears a striking resemblance to one of Sesame Street's most irritable occupants while soaking in a recovery bath

"You're nearly 70, and you're having a baby...?! I mean, what are you, a character from the f—king Bible?"

Rebecca (Hannah Waddingham) shares no joy over Rupert and Bex's bundle of news

"How much do they pay you?"

"Ma'am?"

"Money."

"I make 50."

"A year?!"

Clearly, a shocked Katheryn (Reneé Lawless) is the have; Officer Wilson (Moses Jones), the have not

"Isn't Watchmen also what Jerry Falwell Jr. was into...?"

Host Jimmy Kimmel recaps the night's big nominees

"Jason, when was that photo taken?"

"Uhhh, it's tough to tell. I don't age."

The Ozark star's seat-filler cutout appears to be circa It's Your Move

"President Trump attended a campaign rally in Florida last night. Said COVID-19, 'Oh my God, same!'"

"According to the latest numbers, the name Karen is decreasing in popularity as a potential baby name. Increasing in popularity? Vaxine."

"It has its charms. The rats are like Pokémon — with Hep C."

Hughie (Jack Quaid) tries to make the most of his awful living situation

"Nicooole! I wrote a song for you. 'Here comes the bride, she loves to whine and cry, every time I hear her voice, I want to f—king die!'"

Zingbot's insult for bride-to-be Nicole Franzel might be his most savage one ever

"Twenty-one seasons of winners and not one of those faces looked like mine. So when I walked through those doors, I had that desire, that determination to be that very first face to give hope to those behind me who have the desire to come in here and play this game. Not seeing a face that looks like mine is very discouraging, it's hurtful and it does make me feel like maybe it's impossible. But I'm wrong about that because it's definitively possible. We can do it. It just hasn't been done yet... I want to acknowledge every African American who has walked through those doors with the same desire to be that face that I have. I see you, I salute you and I appreciate you. You came in here, you knew the odds were against you, you knew it was going to be an uphill battle and you still fought and you fought like hell. For that, I love you, I admire you and I acknowledge you all today."

Da'Vonne gives one of the most powerful Big Brother eviction speeches ever