Quotes Of The Week For Feb. 9, 2020

We've rounded up the best TV quotes from Feb. 9 through Feb. 15, 2020. Scroll through our gallery of zingers, bon mots and one-liners below, then tell us if we missed any of your favorite lines from this week's television!

THE NEIGHBORHOOD

"She wants to be friends."

"I'm sorry, little bro. That's a real bummer."

"Are you kidding? I'm in. It might have taken seven seasons, but Monica married Chandler. Could this be a better day?"

Self-proclaimed "Black Chandler" Marty (Marcel Spears) delights in being friend-zoned by upstairs neighbor Keira

9-1-1: LONE STAR

"So, uh, I guess that he told you about me..."

"What, that you're straight? Yeah. I don't judge."

Carlos (Rafael Silva) and TK invite Paul (Brian Michael Smith), who is a trans man, to hit a club with them

GREY'S ANATOMY

"If Catherine thinks she can just move me where she wants like she's playing chess... and I'm some pawn... "

"You're not a pawn — a rook, at least. Maybe a knight."

"You tell Dr. Fox she can go to hell."

"Look, I take it back. You are her queen!"

"Well, checkmate!"

Once Richard (James Pickens Jr.) starts a chess analogy, it's "game over" for Tom (Greg Germann)

GREY'S ANATOMY (Bonus Quote!)

"Soon enough, you guys'll be joking about this over coffee."

"Son, after Godzilla's done stomping all over Tokyo, the mayor doesn't take Godzilla to brunch."

"OK, you are heartbroken, so I'll forget the fact that you just compared my mother to a giant lizard monster."

Jackson (Jesse Williams) is a lot surer than Richard (James Pickens Jr.) that he'll forget his vindictive wife bought his hospital out from under him

STAR TREK: PICARD

"So... space turns out to be super boring. Go figure."

Robotics expert Agnes (Alison Pill) is not impressed by interstellar travel

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BOB HEARTS ABISHOLA

"[Americans] are too free with their feelings. They are like puppies."

"Racist, gun-loving puppies."

Auntie Olu (Shola Adewusi) and Uncle Tunde (Barry Shabaka Henley) explain to Abishola why Bob was quick to say "I love you"

THE FLASH

"I said, 'No onesie!'"

"OK, why does everybody keep calling it that?"

The fastest man alive (Grant Gustin) is no fan of Amunet's (Katee Sackhoff) nickname for his supersuit

DC'S LEGENDS OF TOMORROW

"Hey, what's with the Wi-Fi? I need to clap back at Blue Ivy on CatChat."

The new Zari (Tala Ashe) is apparently in a feud with Beyoncé's daughter in 2044

HIGH FIDELITY (Episode 1)

"I don't love Rumours as a whole. I prefer Tusk, controversial, I know. Rumours is cool... 'The Chain,' which is sick. 'Don't Stop' is more like, no stop, please stop. To me, this band's more about the drama, you know what I mean? Like, you can hear it when you listen to the music. You have all that s—t with Stevie and Lindsey, and John and Christine, and Bob Weston and Mick Fleetwood's wife... Christine and the f—king sound engineer, I mean it's f—king bonkers. You hear it... when you listen to it... I'm still talking, I'm so sorry."

Rob (Zoë Kravitz), giving Clyde her very detailed opinion about Fleetwood Mac on a first date

SURVIVOR: WINNERS AT WAR

"A drink before war is always a good idea!"

Host Jeff Probst toasts the 20 returning winners before the game begins

LAST MAN STANDING

"This is so exciting! A real, American election. When do we start colluding?"

Jen (Krista Marie Yu) can barely contain her excitement about Vanessa's run for State Assembly

SCHITT'S CREEK

"Oh, I didn't know we were bringing our 'friends' tonight."

"Okay. I knew I shouldn't have worn this shirt."

"No, it's nice. It's nice. Is it new... and does it come in an adult size?"

David (Daniel Levy) can't help but notice the "gun show" Patrick (Noah Reid) is putting on for their "drink" with Jake

THIS IS US

"You're fat. I'm ancient. We're gorgeous."

Rebecca (Mandy Moore) won't hear any of Kate's objections to why they shouldn't take a dip in the hotel pool after hours

LOCKE & KEY (Episode 10)

"The FOMO is real."

When there is a demon to be disposed of, Eden (Hallea Jones) offers an unexpected assist

NCIS

"Is that a picture of him in his bathing suit...?"

"Oooh, how do I unsee that? This is like a Japanese horror film. We might all die in seven days."

Bishop (Emily Wickersham) shares Vance's dating app profile with McGee (Sean Murray) and Torres

CRIMINAL MINDS

"I ate so many oysters I'm pretty sure i have pearls growing in me."

"More likely what's growing inside you is vibrio vulnificus — a bacterial contamination caused by eating raw seafood."

"Ignore him. That's what lemon juice is for — you squirt that on stuff and it kills all the bacteria."

"I'm so glad you're not my primary care physician."

JJ's New Orleans anecdote winds up pitting Reid (Matthew Gray Gubler) against Garcia (Kirsten Vangsness)

THE CONNERS

"The early primaries are exciting. That's where you get to see the candidates with integrity and vision, right before the rich ones swoop in and crush them with their corporate campaign dollars."

Darlene (Sara Gilbert) explains the soul-crushing electoral process to Mark

THE CONNERS (Bonus Quote!)

"Are you crazy? They're going to trace this back to us and put us on the no-fly list."

"When was the last time any of us flew? If they ever put us on the no-bus list, then we'll have a problem."

Darlene (Sara Gilbert) worries — but, as Becky (Lecy Goranson) points out, for the wrong reason — when Mark calls the White House

PRODIGAL SON

"Gosh, when was the last time the three of us were together like this? Could it be at that pumpkin patch in Ossining?"

"It was your murder trial."

"Ah, yes. You're right."

Jessica (Bellamy Young) reminds Martin (Michael Sheen) that this Whitly family reunion isn't as pleasant as he thinks it is

SINGLE PARENTS

"Colin would be great for you."

"I know, bro! He's perfect! He's like if Paddington were a man."

Angie (Leighton Meester) is quite smitten with a British dad at Graham's school