Love In The Wild Photo Recap: Cake Wasted! Alcohol Spilled! The Olympic Logo Besmirched!

By Michael Slezak

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photo Question: Is Chase gently stroking Ali's back to calm her fears about jumping off a cliff, or is he about to give her a taste of Marines-style tough love and push her to victory?

Question: Is Chase gently stroking Ali's back to calm her fears about jumping off a cliff, or is he about to give her a taste of Marines-style tough love and push her to victory?

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photo-1 Yeah, you guessed correctly.

Yeah, you guessed correctly.

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photo-3 So what if the farmer didn't speak English? The rules were spelled out in the kind of plain, pre-schooler font that even a Love in the Wild contestant should understand, right? Actually, this quote from Tara might tell a different story: "Y'know, I'm from South Beach, so unless that guinea hen is poppin' my bottles in that cabana, I have no idea what's going on."

So what if the farmer didn't speak English? The rules were spelled out in the kind of plain, pre-schooler font that even a Love in the Wild contestant should understand, right? Actually, this quote from Tara might tell a different story: "Y'know, I'm from South Beach, so unless that guinea hen is poppin' my bottles in that cabana, I have no idea what's going on."

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photo-4 Ali and Chase break the most important commandment of reality TV dating shows: Thou shalt not spill alcohol. (Obviously, we all have to root against them now.)

Ali and Chase break the most important commandment of reality TV dating shows: Thou shalt not spill alcohol. (Obviously, we all have to root against them now.)

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photo-6 Note the Olympic symbol underneath the NBC logo quietly trying to edge its way off the TV screen.

Note the Olympic symbol underneath the NBC logo quietly trying to edge its way off the TV screen.

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photo-5 Jenny discovers that "a disgusting slab of wood" under a a cold, damp lean-to results in "no romanticism."

Jenny discovers that "a disgusting slab of wood" under a a cold, damp lean-to results in "no romanticism."

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photo-7 In spite of comments like "I would like to have sex with you. Yes I would." Ken's courtship of Yanina remains the most romantic aspect of Season 2. (Not that he's got much competition.)

In spite of comments like "I would like to have sex with you. Yes I would." Ken's courtship of Yanina remains the most romantic aspect of Season 2. (Not that he's got much competition.)

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photo-9 "I'm sure the other girls were disappointed to not have had a chance to choose me." --The Timster

"I'm sure the other girls were disappointed to not have had a chance to choose me." –The Timster

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photo-10 "The Timster doesn't eat cake. I grab it and smash it on people's heads." Illegal!

"The Timster doesn't eat cake. I grab it and smash it on people's heads." Illegal!

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photo-11 I really wish that after Summer had sent Tim to the "Unmatched Area," she'd have given him the same exact "apology" he offered after grinding birthday cake into her hair: "If I hurt your feelings, then I'm sorry."

I really wish that after Summer had sent Tim to the "Unmatched Area," she'd have given him the same exact "apology" he offered after grinding birthday cake into her hair: "If I hurt your feelings, then I'm sorry."

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photo-12 "I put my foot out there," Shauna wept, after Ben chose to stay with Jenny instead of gravitating toward the contestant most likely to be brutally impersonated by Kristen Wiig if Love in the Wild were a bigger hit, and if Kristen Wiig hadn't recently left SNL.

"I put my foot out there," Shauna wept, after Ben chose to stay with Jenny instead of gravitating toward the contestant most likely to be brutally impersonated by Kristen Wiig if Love in the Wild were a bigger hit, and if Kristen Wiig hadn't recently left SNL.

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photo-13 Anybody else wish the show's producers had waited to introduce Chesty McSmugbrows to the mix before sending Shauna on her way? If they had, I bet we'd have had twice the mascara smudging.

Anybody else wish the show's producers had waited to introduce Chesty McSmugbrows to the mix before sending Shauna on her way? If they had, I bet we'd have had twice the mascara smudging.

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