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Quotes of the Week for March 17, 2019
ARROW
“Hey, I was thinking a vintage movie night. A Jordan Peele marathon.”
Nice to know that Get Out and Us are timeless
LAST MAN STANDING
“This one says Toy Story 4, but I don’t know how Dad would have that one already.”
Eve (Kaitlyn Dever) finds a suspicious movie rental in Buzz Lightyear’s Mike’s den
NCIS: LOS ANGELES
“When did she give the box to you?”
“I dunno — a year ago? Maybe six?”
“I hope it wasn’t a puppy.”
We hope so, too!
THIS IS US
“Are you OK? I’m only asking because, when you broke up with me, I spent a lot of time wondering if you were OK. I also wanted to kill you. It was like, 50 percent wondering, 50 percent wanting to kill… More like 70/30.”
“Seventy percent wondering if I was OK and 30 percent wanting to kill me?”
“No.”
“Got it.”
Sophie (Alexandra Breckenridge) and Kevin (Justin Hartley) catch up for the first time since their split
BROAD CITY
“Since we only have one week left, I have planned a surprise…”
“Please tell me it’s not tickets to the musical about Jimmy Fallon’s childhood.”
“Born to Giggle? No!”
Abbi (Abbi Jacobson) and Ilana (Ilana Glazer) have no intention of seeing Jimmy Fallon’s fictional Broadway show — sorry, Jimmy
SPLITTING UP TOGETHER
“I’ve been seeing someone.”
“Behind Martin’s back?!”
“It’s Annie Apple.”
“Is that someone from an Archie comic?”
Lena (Jenna Fischer) spills the beans to Camille (Lindsay Price) about helping out with Martin’s baby
VANDERPUMP RULES
“I’m done with people thinking, ‘You think you’re better than people.’ No, I don’t think I’m better than people. But I know when I’m above someone. And I’m above you.”
Lala defends herself against accusations of snobbery — and maybe draws a distinction without a difference
BLINDSPOT
“You are so transparent, I can see your uvula piercing.”
Boston (Josh Dean) has no time for Rich Dotcom’s mind games
THE ORVILLE
“Look at this — she’s clearly asking her friend where to find the nearest repair service for her device. But instead of writing ‘wireless telecommunications facility,’ she just wrote ‘WTF.'”
Texting abbreviations circa 2015 get lost in translation
BETTER THINGS
“Fine, I’ll just go live with Paisley. I’ll live out of a van, I’ll get raped and become a meth head.”
“Good! That’s not living at home!”
Sam (Pamela Adlon) isn’t falling for a guilt trip from daughter Max (Mikey Madison)
THE VOICE
“I manage a restaurant…”
“I love food! We have so much in common!”
Kelly Clarkson, grasping at straws in hopes of adding contestant Kalvin Jarvis to her team
THE FLASH
“Do you remember that time sphere that we built for Thawne?”
“That big hamster ball thing?”
“Somebody stole one in the future, to come here.”
“It makes sense. [Joe shakes head] I can’t even believe I just said that.”
Timey-wimeyness is becoming old hat for Joe (Jesse L. Martin)
LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS
“[Tucker Carlson] always looks like he’s 30 seconds into an allergic reaction. ‘Were there nuts in this muffin?!?'”
DOOM PATROL
“Please, God, don’t let me puke in my bandages…”
Unanticipated teleportation has Larry (voiced by Matt Bomer) feeling unraveled
SUPERSTORE
“I can watch something with a little more diversity.”
“How about Empire?”
“[Sucks teeth] Gonna start right in the deep end, huh?”
Glenn (Mark McKinney) and Mateo (Nico Santos) struggle to agree on a show to binge
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