The Traitors Recap: A Banquet To Die For

If you ever find yourself in Alan's Scottish castle and said host invites you to a magnificent banquet... be afraid. Be very afraid. 

At the top of Thursday's episode of "The Traitors," Cumming's faithful guests are right to be wary. As they question their every move — don't touch the creepy tarot cards! — some hesitate to accept a glass of wine or a slice of turkey from one another. AS THEY SHOULD! 

We interrupt this recap, however, to give the Season 4 cast one loudly exclaimed, DAAAAYUM! This group came to serve FA-SHION. It may not be the Met Gala, but everyone here came to slay. Yam Yam's feathered arm? Johnny's glitter top? Lisa's... I don't exactly know how to describe what Lisa is wearing. She kind of looks like a mix of "Housewives" meets "Below Deck"? (No shade, she looks fab.) But seriously, haute couture, coming through!

Lisa, stunning even more with her fancy, yet deadly amulet, narrows down her kill list to Natalie, Kristen, and Yam Yam. She plays off the murder exquisitely, pretending that her amulet pin came loose and is jabbing her in the shoulder. 

But before we learn who the victim is, Alan offers up a twist! He has two antidotes to the poison, but the group must agree on who will slug it down. And they don't have a lot of time to decide. Tara and Natalie both speak up about feeling vulnerable and needing an antidote. While some think that Kristen should take one, the chef says she's not going to beg or fight for it. While Tara and Natalie go back and forth, Johnny grabs a potion for Kristen who drinks it down. Then, Natalie wins her battle and drinks the second. But did either of the women actually need it?

Nope! The group doesn't need to wait long to find out who the cursed player is. Alan circles the table. "The player that was cursed to death is... YOU, YAM YAM!" As he utters this phrase, some masked goons pull out Yam Yam's chair and drag him outta there. On the way out, he screams that Lisa kissed him on the cheek and therefore, must be a traitor. Talk about drama! (Insert the "Happy Endings" GIF here. IYKYK!) But can Lisa F—kin' Rinna recover from this?

The three traitors arrive to breakfast first, giving them ample time to talk things out. At the last roundtable, Rob voted for his fellow traitor Lisa. He explains to her how, since he was very vocal about Ron not being a traitor, it would've looked "super off" if he voted his dear chess buddy out. But Lisa's patience is dwindling. She had to do all the heavy lifting at the banquet, and she asks her fellow traitors for help in clearing her name. However, Rob feels Yam Yam signed Lisa's death warrant, so from the sound of it, it doesn't seem like he's going to be putting in much work for the former Housewife of Beverly Hills. Not a bit! 

At the challenge, the players collect gold as they trek up a mountain. The six highest earners then get a chance to win the coveted dagger. This dagger gives one player a special power: They can vote twice at any one of the next four roundtables. After a little game that involves lie detection, Rob bests Natalie, Mark, Eric, Stephen, and Colton, but they all agree to form a pact. Since they're all a bunch of honest, honest faithfuls (heh), they agree not to tell the others who's holding the dagger. (Aside: Rob is straight up killing — pun not intended — this game. Does he remind anyone else of the UK's Harry from Season 2? Dude's gonna take it all!)

Important to note, before the challenge, Natalie misspeaks in front of Tara and Lisa. When trying to explain how all the gamers are dead and gone, she says, "We killed one, we murdered one..." (she meant to say "banished"), and the snafu is music to Lisa's ears. She finally has some decent evidence to bring to the roundtable in an attempt to bury Nat and save her bacon in one fell swoop. 

And bring it to the roundtable, she does! Everyone's ears perk up, with Tara speaking up to say that she did, in fact, hear the same. Natalie's determination to get the antidote also raises some suspicions. Was it a double bluff to make her look like a faithful? Seems like a far reach, but it's discussed. Colton then brings up Yam Yam's final fighting words — that Lisa was the one who killed him off. Lisa says she already had heat on her, so it was an easy straw for him to grasp at. We know the truth, but will the group buy Lisa's retort? It was an air-kiss! No self-respecting Housewife would put her makeup in jeopardy, right?! 

When it's time for the vote, "Survivor" winner Natalie does what she does best — survives. Candiace burns her vote on Rob (sus), but it's all for naught. Lisa F—kin' Rinna is banished from the game (and I, my fellow faithfuls, am very sad about it). 

Did you think the traitors were going to run this game and work together till the end? Are you bummed to see Yam Yam and Lisa go? Is Rob going to win it all?! Hit the comments and let it be known!