ABC's Grand Hotel: Grade the Premiere!

Grand Hotel Recap

ABC on Monday opened the doors of Grand Hotel, inviting viewers to explore a murder mystery that has already yielded one mother — sorry, make that brother — of a twist.

The tragic tale unfolds at the Riviera Grand, the last family-owned hotel in Miami, as mentioned ad nauseam by the show’s ensemble of beautiful schemers. One month after an employee goes “missing” during a hurricane, Santiago Mendoza — arguably the schemiest of them all — announces that he’s selling the hotel to a new family, one whose garbage-bag son happens to be marrying the daughter of Gigi Mendoza, Santiago’s scheme-sational new wife. (Yes, it’s complicated. And yes, they’re basically using the hotel as a dowery. But such is the world of Grand Hotel, so just go with it.)

None of this sits well with Santiago’s children — Alicia, a kindhearted young woman who always dreamed of inheriting her late mother’s hotel, and Javi, a sex-crazed slacker with a painful secret — who immediately begin scheming to halt the sale. Fortunately, it doesn’t take much; Alicia catches her stepsister boning one of the hotel’s V.I.P. clients the night before her wedding, resulting in a particularly explosive scene at the altar.

All the while, a handsome (and extremely scheme-y) new waiter named Danny is hired at the hotel, and even though he admits to fabricating his entire resume, he gets to keep his job after impressing Santiago with his handling of the chaos at the wedding. But there’s one thing no one knows about Danny: His sister is the missing hotel employee, and he won’t rest until he’s Emily Thorn’d his way through every last person at the Riviera Grand.

Meanwhile, Alicia’s victory is cut short when Santiago reveals that selling the hotel was a last-ditch effort to save their family. It turns out the Riviera Grand is a big ol’ money pit, and his “right-hand man” Mateo is actually a liaison between the Mendozas and… someone really bad, probably. Speaking of Mateo, he got one of the hotel maids pregnant, but the self-proclaimed gold digger wasn’t thrilled by his offer to pay for an abortion, so she decided to trick Javi — the aforementioned slacker who can’t always remember the names or faces of his sexual conquests — into thinking he’s the father. Hotel life is wild!

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