“If I can’t get laid, at least I can do something about nuclear proliferation,” President Mellie Grant declared atop Thursday’s Scandal. “Let’s get some world peace!”
That should tell you pretty much everything you need to know about this week’s episode, but just for kicks, let’s recap it anyway:
After delivering a literal vagina monologue about her lonely life of power (“There is a famine in my lady bits!”), Mellie set her sights on convincing President Rashad of Bashran — which is not a real country, according to my lazy Google search — to sign a nuclear treaty at her first state dinner as POTUS.
When Plan A didn’t work (“A godless white lady coming to save us? I don’t think so!”), Mellie moved on to Plan B: allowing Olivia, with an assist from Jake, to blackmail President Rashad into signing the agreement. It turns out the president helped his Bashrani niece enroll in a prestigious American college under a fake name, but Liv’s threat to reveal this information — in a men’s bathroom, no less! — didn’t exactly have the intended effect. After calling her the devil, President Rashad announced that he’d be leaving the dinner early.
Just when all hope seemed lost, Huck discovered that someone at the dinner was actually an assassin posing as a decorated member of the U.S. Army. (And you know a situation is dire when the arrival of an assassin is a good thing.) The killer was actually a Bashrani man, furious with President Rashad for allegedly turning a blind eye to his people, but because Huck intercepted him, the Secret Service was able to keep him from finishing the job.
Needless to say, President Rashad was very grateful — and suddenly more eager to talk about treaties. And if his flirting with Mellie was any indication (“I look forward to the two of us working together…”), she may be killing two birds with one stone.
But the big moment, in true Scandal fashion, was saved for the very end. Olivia took Curtis back to her place for a little post-dinner hookup… only to find Fitz standing in her hallway! So. Awkward.
In other couple-y news…
* Maybe it’s just because of Dean Norris’ Claws character, but did anyone else expect something romantic — or lusty, at the very least — to go down between Cyrus and his rich new pal? I haven’t Cyrus get that worked up in a long time.
* I find myself caring about David and Abby more than I ever thought I would, and I liked that he held her hand during the concert.
* On the flip side, I’m kind of struggling to care about Quinn and Charlie’s domestic problems. (This week, he tried to convince Quinn that he wasn’t good enough for her, only to receive a big fat slap in the face.)