This is either going to be really good or so bad, it’s great. But either way, ABC’s relaunch of Battle of the Network Stars (premiering Thursday, June 29 at 9/8c) is looking like the summer’s must-see — especially since on Tuesday the full list of competitors was released. The celebrities we’re most psyched to see throwing down in events like the kayak relay race and dunk tank:
Lou Ferrigno: Don’t we all want to believe that, even at age 65, the Incredible Hulk is invincible?
John Barrowman: Whether the contest includes a battle of wit (get it?), the Arrow baddie is sure to toss off a zinger or 10.
Vivica A. Fox: Like a measly archery challenge could intimidate a casualty of Sharknado 2.
Adrian Zmed: OK, so the T.J. Hooker cop is on our list mainly because of our (very) faint hope that at some point he’ll bust out in “Prowlin’” from Grease 2.
Parker Stevenson: Sorry, Shaun Cassidy. Frank was always our favorite Hardy Boy.
Lisa Whelchel: After Survivor, this oughta be a piece of cake for The Facts of Life’s Blair.
Taye Diggs: Because where there’s a dunk tank, there’s a good chance Taye Diggs will get wet.
Charisma Carpenter: Having her compete in a tug-of-war against Julie Benz may be the closest we ever again come to seeing Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel’s Cordelia and Darla face off.
Jill Wagner: The former Wipeout co-host is sure to scoff at Battle’s comparatively simple obstacle course.
Jackée Harry: She’ll win the sassy smack-talk challenge for her team even if there isn’t one.
Here’s the full list of stars competing on the 20 teams that will, in different episodes, do their damnedest to avoid “the agony of defeat”:
TV Sitcoms (Bronson Pinchot, Tom Arnold, Dave Coulier, AJ Michalka, Tracey Gold) vs. TV Kids (Joey Lawrence, Corbin Bleu, Nolan Gould, Lisa Whelchel, Kim Fields)
Primetime Soaps (Ian Ziering, Josh Henderson, Gabrielle Carteris, Donna Mills, Mischa Barton) vs. ABC Stars (Olivia d’Abo, Shari Belafonte, Michael Fishman, Jason Hervey, Anson Williams)
Variety (Joanna Krupa, Nick Lachey, Vanessa Lachey, Gilles Marini, Jack Osbourne) vs. TV Sex Symbols (Keegan Allen, Traci Bingham, Rosa Blasi, Brant Daugherty, Galen Gering)
Cops (Erik Estrada, Larry Wilcox, Kelly Hu, Jodi Lyn O’Keefe, Lorenzo Lamas) vs. TV Sitcoms (Todd Bridges, Leigh-Allyn Baker, Dave Foley, Willie Garson, Jenna von Oy)
White House (Cornelius Smith Jr., Marlee Matlin, Joshua Malina, LaMonica Garrett, Mary McCormack) vs. Lawyers (Elisabeth Rohm, Corbin Bernsen, Matt McGorry, Romi Dias, Catherine Bell)
TV Moms & Dads (Chad Lowe, Greg Evigan, Ted McGinley, Lesley Fera, Jackee Harry) vs. TV Kids (Jimmie Walker, Mackenzie Phillips, Jonathan Lipnicki, Krista Marie Yu, Jeremy Miller)
Famous TV Families (Danny Bonaduce, Barry Williams, Beverley Mitchell, Willie Aames, Charlene Tilton) vs. Doctors (Thomas Calabro, Taye Diggs, Rachelle Lefevre, Deidre Hall, Benjamin Hollingsworth)
Troublemakers (Vivica A. Fox, Paul Johansson, John Barrowman, Julie Benz, Catherine Bach) vs. TV Lifeguards (David Chokachi, Brande Roderick, Parker Stevenson, Nicole Eggert, Gena Lee Nolin)
ABC Stars (Ted Lange, Troy Gentile, Jill Whelan, Denise Richards, Joely Fisher) vs. Variety (Lance Bass, Joey Fatone, Adrienne Houghton, Cameron Mathison, Kelly Osbourne)
Cops (Marisol Nichols, Roma Maffia, Adrian Zmed, Fred Dryer, Ryan Paevey) vs. Sci-Fi/Fantasy (Lou Ferrigno, Vinnie Jones, Charisma Carpenter, Kevin Sorbo, Jill Wagner)
So, which stars are you most looking forward to seeing compete? Have you picked a team already? Hit the comments.