Vampire Diaries Recap: Womb Raider

Vampire Diaries Caroline Pregnant

Ain’t no party like a heretic party, ’cause a heretic party’s got… Oh, who am I kidding? This whole night was a freakin’ disaster.

So much crazy crap went down on Thursday’s Vampire Diaries, and I promise I’ll get to all of it, but first thing’s first: Caroline Forbes is pregnant with Alaric Saltzman’s twins?! (I don’t usually full-name these characters, but in this case, I think we can all agree it’s appropriate.)

Like most of my fellow TVD live-tweeters, my initial reaction to learning that Alaric is Caroline’s future fiancé couldn’t possibly have been contained in 140 characters, but after giving it some thought, I’m actually OK with it. Sure, I’d love to see her with Stefan in three years, but at least she’s with someone who will treat her right. (Also, I’m hoping Caroline will have better survival odds than Alaric “Black Widow” Saltzman’s previous love interests.)

But the second revelation — that Jolaric’s twins are not only alive, but growing inside Caroline’s undead uterus — was just too damn much for me to process. Like, kill me now and bury me next to Jo (real name: Florence the Vampire), for I am permanently deceased.

As if anything else in this life matters anymore, let’s talk about the episode’s other developments, shall we?

PARTY MONSTERS | Lily’s attempt to make peace with her sons via an elaborate house party went up in flames — literally, at one point — when Julian attempted to teach the Salvatore boys a lesson in respect. (For the record, I wouldn’t respect anyone who threw a damn knife at my head, either!) That, coupled with Stefan’s revelation about Julian forcing Valerie to miscarry, was all Damon needed to get on board with Operation: Kill Our New Stepdad.

BACK TO SCHOOL | Did we witness the birth of #Benzo this week? Seeing Bonnie flirt with Enzo in an attempt to make Lily jealous was super hot, and I absolutely support them getting together in three years, 100 percent. I originally wanted her with Matt, but to be honest, I’m starting to wonder if ol’ Blue Blue will even survive the time jump at this point — especially if he keeps throwing himself in harm’s way, like when he and Bonnie followed that compelled cater waiter to Mystic Falls High School without a damn clue what they were getting themselves into. (What was going on there, anyway? Could all those bodies be mere vessels for more vampire souls?)

TVD family, what are our collective thoughts on the whole Caroline-Alaric-baby situation? (I already checked WebMD, by the way, and it’s totally possible.) Drop a comment with your reactions below.

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