How to Get Away With Murder Recap: Absolutely Stabulous

My name is Mike, and I’m a sociopath. OK, not true exactly. But I’m pretty sure How to Get Away With Murder is turning me into the kind of person who cheers, rewinds the DVR and inhales another fistful of popcorn when a sociopath/sociopath-adjacent gets all up in a rival’s face and threatens to finish ’em like Annalise Keating swallowing her last few drops of Thursday-night vodka.

Allow me to replay this week’s spontaneous (and very unwelcome) closing argument from Annalise’s horrifying teenage client Zoe: “You think that you’re anything without me? You’re nothing. You’re just some basic bitch who better watch her back. That’s right — you’re next, whore!”

Sheesh — imagine how honest girl might’ve gotten if somebody had asked her to place her hand on the Bible beforehand!

All kidding aside, please tell me I’m not the only one who got a case of the giddies watching that twisted monster burst forth from her Zoe-shaped cage and make herself known to the world (and the jury). And while no one in the HTGAWM universe can quite compete with the 52 stab wounds inflicted on Zoe’s innocent bestie, it’s not like any of them can feign purity. Oh, except for Catherine, whose hymen has been declared 100 percent in tact by a Philadelphia-area physician, despite her having grown up riding horse. (Hat tip to the cynical Michaela for that whopper.)

Ugh, we’re only on the fifth paragraph of this recap, and I’ve already used the words “hymen,” “Bible,” and “bestie.” Maybe I should try to distract you by cutting to the action, yes? Let’s go!

EXTRA VIRGIN MURDER SUSPECT |  Annalise sends Michaela to prep Caleb and Catherine for trial — or at least use the exercise to find out whether they’re telling the truth about not having a sexual relationship. “You’re smart, Michaela. That’s why,” says Annalise, when Michaela asks why she got picked for the assigment. “And you’ve got boobs — a brother not screwing his sister should respond to them.” While Michaela and Caleb initially clash — she calls him “a little victim-y,” he counters that she’s “a little bitchy” — it’s eventually a case of Paradise by the Soda Machine Light. In other words, Michaela spots Caleb in the cool, blue glow of a TV vending machine — the kind of glow that an actual vending machine most definitely does not give off — and starts to look a little smitten. (More on that in a moment.) Why are they at a hospital? Why, to certify Catherine’s claim that she couldn’t have been banging her adopted brother — because she’d never banged anyone at all. I half expected/wanted Maury Povich to burst onto the scene and shout, “The results are in… Catherine, you ARE a virgin!” The actuality is a little less heightened — but Catherine’s claims are upheld. (Side note: Has no one ever heard of oral?)

I WANT YOU TO WANT ME MY HUSBAND/ I NEED YOU TO NEED KILL ME |  Annalise gets uncharacteristically distracted at trial — not that she’ll allow Bonnie to imply it — mainly because Nate’s wife Nia calls her down to the hospital and asks for a little favor: “I want you to kill me.” OK, maybe it’s a big favor, but Nia’s got a point about Annalise bedding her hubby during her battle with cancer — and hanging Nate out to dry for the death of Annalise’s hubby, too. “Just be a good person for once and get me the pills!” an exasperated Nia finally begs. But while she has Frank get her the little orange bottle, she changes her mind at the last minute. “I think about it a lot — killing myself,” Annalise tells Nia, then reasons that if she can’t find a reason to end her own life — even if it might benefit the world at large. You know Nia would get up and backhand her romantic rival if she had the strength, but Annalise makes a good point in the end: Everybody’s ultimately alone in his or her own pain, anyway. Sure, La Keating’s not going to get a self-help book contract with a premise like that, but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a point.

ASHER MILLSTONE’S DAY OFF |  Asher calls in sick — but he’s actually with his powerful judge dad making an immunity deal with That Bitch Prosecutor Who Is Going Down (Over a Balcony) in Only Four Weeks’ Time. Turns out he’s going to testify that Annalise got Nate to kill Sam on her behalf — in exchange for not being punished for whatever happened on Trotter Lake. But right as Emily Sinclair tells Asher and his dad that she’ll get the deal signed off on in the morning, who shows up but Bonnie? Yep, she had Asher’s phone tracked — and now, to protect the truth of Season 1 Murder Night and keep Annalise safe, she falsely confesses to killing Sam. You know that’s gonna cause Asher to backtrack. Yeah, they broke up, but he’s still got her in his contact list as Bonbon. (Kinda bold considering they’re coworkers, no?)

CASE OF THE WEEK |  You heard about heinous Zoe above — and she winds up going away for murder after Laurel steals her phone and finds a video of her boasting about slaughtering her teenage pal — and then Connor goes and sends a copy to the ADA. Mr. Walsh, you see, thinks the Keating Five has fallen under the same kind of cult manipulation that rules teenage-girl clicks. What he forgets, as he tells Annalise that he’d commit the same legal misdeed all over again, is that his boss is no teenage girl. When Connor says he doesn’t want any more blood on his hands, Annalise gets right in his face and says, “You know where else there’s blood? Your car.” Yep — the SUV laden with Sam’s DNA, which Frank claimed to have gotten rid of, may still be in the mix. And as long as Connor’s a good boy and doesn’t mess with Annalise’s cases, it’ll remain in that great parking lot/junkyard in Nowheresville, USA.

NATE AND WES AND LEVI ET AL | Oh lord, this episode sure has a lot of plot to cover, no? Lemme try to condense. Michaela and Levi have graduated to nasty, “Spank me, daddy” phone chat. Wes learns that Levi is still seeing Michaela and tries to break ties with him. But whoops, Levi’s followup on intel from Nate — regarding Frank’s calls to a Sabrina Mancini on the day of Rebecca’s disappearance
Levi tracks down — yields fruit. Sabrina’s brother works at Strathaven Cemetery — and now Wes is convinced that’s where Rebecca’s body is buried. If he’s not careful, though, he might end up there, too. Annalise exits Nia’s hospital suite and sees Nate and Wes in the parking lot — in heated conversation. And now, like Nikki Minaj eyeing down her rival Miley Cyrus, I kinda want Annalise to look at her lover and her maybe-future lover and ask, “What’s good, fellas?”

FOUR WEEKS FROM NOW (AKA SHOOTING NIGHT) |  In a nutshell, Annalise is flatlining in an ambulance, and flashing back to all the craziness from the Hapstall case, from Nia’s death wish and more. Meanwhile, Laurel, Wes, Connor and Michaela are fleeing the mansion in Nate’s car — when Michaela gets a phone call and has to act as casual as if she’d just dropped by the mall food court for some Panda Express. The quintet (Nate’s in the driver’s seat, remember) let Michaela out at her apartment — where she goes upstairs to find Caleb waiting for her. “How is she?” he asks. “Good,” answers Michaela. And all I can think is: What in the name of all that’s Shondaland is this leading to?!?!

Your turn. What did you think of this week’s HTGAWM? What the heck is the connection between Caleb and Michaela and Annalise’s shooting? Hit the comments with your thoughts!

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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  1. Pecola says:

    So good.

    If there was an award for most improved television show, HTGAWM should win it.

    • Phlerg says:

      Omg, I love every episode. These writers are fantastic! So glad I decided to pick it up last year. I think it might be my favorite show. I never want it to end each week!! And when it does, I’m always saying to myself “WOW!!” I was wondering how they’d move on from the Lila and Sam murders……THEN they throw Rebecca into the mix, making Frank, Wes and Bonnie murderers…..heck, even Annalise’s mom has gotten away with murder…..I wouldn’t be surprised if more people that orbit Annalise, specifically Nate and the remaining Keating 5, end up murdering someone…..if they haven’t already, which could be likely in Ashers case at Trout Lake.
      Also, I think that by the end of this season, we’ll find out that Annalise planned her own attack, and its all part of a delicate coverup to get away with the murder of the ADA who is now dead on the ground outside “castle sib-cest”. I’m dying to know who pushed her!

  2. aa says:

    Was it just me, or was Caleb covered in blood when Michaela saw him in her apartment?

    • Angela says:

      I thought it looked like he had some stuff on his clothes, too, yeah! And if that’s the case…the plot thickens… And if Michaela and Caleb are that close in that flashforward, then what does that mean for Levi?
      That whole thing with Zoe’s outburst in the courtroom. Daaaaaaaaaaaang. I’m even more glad Connor went behind Annalise’s back and snuck that video in now (especially with the way Zoe’s parents wanted that video covered up, too-I get they don’t want their daughter to go to jail, but not letting her suffer the consequences of her actions isn’t a very good idea, either).
      I really liked seeing the whole thing of Connor feeling some guilt and standing up to Annalise and calling her out on some of her recent behavior. Mind, now that she dropped that little blackmail bomb about his car, he may come to regret that, but still… It’s interesting seeing Connor being the moral compass of the group right now. I like it :D. I also like that he tries to defend people when they’re being judged for their sexual choices-obviously opening up to Zoe backfired on him here, but still, I like that he can be sympathetic about that issue in general.
      Bonnie covering for Annalise and confessing to Asher. Ooh. That combined with whatever the hell Asher’s trying to keep secret about Trotter Lake-there’s gonna be one hell of an explosion with that storyline soon, isn’t there? Same with the whole Nate/Wes/Rebecca thing-so her body’s in a cemetery, then, supposedly? Hmmm.
      And I’m so glad that Annalise didn’t give in to Nia’s demands. I sympathize with Nia’s position, and if she wants to end her suffering she should have the right to make that choice. But it’s not Annalise’s place to do that for her.
      Really good episode, this one.

  3. laurelnev says:

    There HAS to be MORE to Ana’s relationship with Wes than we know. That look said maternal betrayal when she saw Wes conspiring with Nate. And Asher? Well, Asher’s got to go! He’s turning evidence and he has it ALL WRONG! Bonnie must be expecting to get off and/or be securing a debt for protection when the whole Rebbecca thing comes out. It’s getting SO twisty-turney these days!

  4. Margaret says:

    Kudos to Anuka (aka Traci Nash from Rookie Blue), I thought she was super strong tonight. Has to take some kind of woman to make Annalise squirm and apparently that woman is Nia Lahey.

    • Sissy says:

      The entire time Nia Lahey was asking, begging, for Annalise to help her kill herself, I kept thinking, whoa, she wants to frame Annalise for “assisted suicide” as revenge. Glad Annalise figured it out. Or did she?

    • dan says:

      The best scenes of the episode were in the hospital room between Nia and Annaliese. The rest of the show has become a flashback/flashforward/flashsideways mess! And enough with the “case of the week” that adds nothing to the 12 other storylines that need to play out.

  5. nick says:

    Tonight’s episode was incredible! As much as I loved last season, this is so much better. As good as it is though, the direction makes me sad, but only because I love these characters so much.

  6. Sim Paniza says:

    wow! im out of words for this episode! This season has so much ground to cover and everything has been spot on! im just in awe of the twists and turns im watching, once i finished watching, i hit replay again and again, and makes me cringe and impatient to see the next episode! Kudos HTGAWM team, just Wow! best show on all of tv hands down!

  7. MFL says:

    This show is brilliant…season 2 is even better than season 1

  8. liame says:

    Another great episode.

  9. Eloise says:

    excellent post I’m a big sports fan from portugal

  10. Fannie says:

    But who killed Sam then? Were all the Keating 5 or Rebecca?

    • dan says:

      Bonnie is covering for Annaliese. Bonnie doesn’t know that The Puppy (Wes) did it; she thinks Annaliese did it. She assumes that Asher will retract his statement to the Prosecutor (Sinclair or St. Clair, whatever her name is) and/or cause confusion so that the DA doesn’t know who did it.

      • Fannie says:

        In this show everyone is covering for everyone but the other one does not know who is covering for whom, the reason why this show is good.

      • Titom says:

        Bonnie doesn’t know which one of the 4 (Laurel, Wes, Michaela, Connor) did it, but she knows one of them did. She knows Annalise & Frank helped them cover it up.

  11. Murder1 says:

    Please dont Kill Connor he is one of my fav ones

  12. robandco says:

    Ok, all these awesome developments about this season’s case should have come sooner but WOW. I am starting to take interest in the case and the incest siblings.
    This episode was so good I hope they can keep up with that.

  13. Denise says:

    I swear that every time this show is at an end, I sit there and say what the hell just happened and what did I miss? This show is the most confusing show I’ve ever watched without missing an episode. I think that this show can’t continue for several seasons and then something else gets thrown in the mix. Wow. p.s. I had a feeling that Zoe was really the bad one in the whole episode. I know it’s t.v. but I hope she rots. Major brat.

    • Jax&Juice's Girl says:

      It’s confusing but it’s REALLY GOOD! I don’t care I love this damn show lots of twists and turns Bonnie covering for Annalise we know it was Wes who killed Sam. Can’t wait for next wks. episode that one looks super insane!!!!!!!!

  14. Titom says:

    I absolutely loved the case-of-the-week. I think they should have cut the storyline with Nate’s wife, because everything felt rushed, especially with the case of the week and the storyline with Nate’s wife is the only one that wasn’t essential to the plot.
    Can I just say that the actress who played Zoe was ON FIRE?! She was amazing! I wish we could have seen more of the case, it felt really.. unfinished. I mean, sure, she blew up, but the video.. The other 2 girls were super shady!^^

  15. Tony says:

    Just watched. Great episode. One of the things not mentioned in the comment section is Connor and his being the voice of reason in Annalise’s twisted circle. I love the character and how twisted she is. But there always has to be that voice that balances out the antihero and their mess.

    Right now, HTGAWM is one of the best shows on TV. Absolutely no doubt about it.

  16. Abby says:

    I find it innately odd that the postmodern character construct of sociopath- as- protagonist is popping up all over Hollywood embraced and beloved. What on earth would Jung have made of our national delight in being seduced by such manipulative, repulsive characters? I never miss the show. Perhaps we are all Stockholm-like negatively conditioned by 15 years of repeated rape cycles from big business and now we all love the sickos. I feel sincerely troubled that my VCR is of course already set and prioritized for the rest of the season.