Once Recap: The Rewrite Stuff — Plus, Has Regina Been 'Screwed Over Most'?

Once Upon a Time Gold Rewrites Story

This week on ABC’s Once Upon a Time, Regina aimed to rewrite Zelena’s story, Lily got a bit hot-headed, Emma rendered a final verdict on her folks and Rumple got in the last word.

IN THE ENCHANTED FOREST THAT WAS…. | Cora returns from Wonderland resolved to make peace with Regina, on the anniversary of Daniel’s death. To that end, Cora seeks out the lion-tattooed “soul mate” that (an apparently blabby!) Tinker Bell had told her about in her travels. But when Cora gets the 411 on Robin Hood (that “married, moralizing sap”), she invites the Sheriff of Nottingham to masquerade as Regina’s soul mate. That jig is up almost as soon it starts, though, when Regina discovers that his ink is bogus.

Regina finds the strength in herself to hurt conniving Cora the best way she can, by taking a potion that will render her unable to ever be a “baby mill” for her mom — though Cora maintains she truly wanted Regina to be happy, and wasn’t plotting any long-game power grab. Moral of the story: “The only one standing in the way of your happiness, Regina, is you.”

IN STORYBROOKE…. | After everyone returns from the Massachusetts/NYC road trip, Regina locks up Zelena, planning to have the Author rewrite her sister’s story. But first, the Author’s ink needs to be “charged” by the dark energy of the Savior — which Regina procures by slashing smart-mouthed Lily’s hand at a bus stop. That’s the last straw for Lily, who already has been disappointed by her forward-looking, revenge-averse mom, and the gal transforms into a dragon. In her beastly state, Lily clobbers Snow White with her tail. Emma arrives on the scene to “magic” away the gash and then — having being nudged by Hook JENNIFER MORRISON, COLIN O'DONOGHUEto not let both of her parents’ grand attempts to protect her (first at birth, and by keeping their dark secret) turn out to be failures — tell her parents that she needs to stop punishing them and thus forgives them.

Meanwhile, Maleficent tracks down Lily, who’s now back in human form, and hands her the rattle she has kept all these years. A confused Lily says, “I thought you’d be this scary dragon bitch” who’d team with her to get back all those who wronged them, “but you’re so frickin’ open, it kills me.” Lily explains that anyone who has ever tried to look out for her, “I’ve always let them down” — “darkness is serious business,” after all. But Mal convinces her to stick around a week and get some tips on being a “scary dragon bitch.”

Back in Zelena’s padded room, Regina announces her plan to have the Author write her sis out of existence, unborn baby and all. But when Zelena’s likens Regina to their mother, who also made a baby go away without so much as blinking, Regina reconsiders. Instead, she declares that she has everything that she wants — and that doesn’t just mean a man. Rather, her happy ending is “feeling at home in the world,” and Robin is but one part of that.

The Author, though, is itching to do some rewriting, and if he can’t do it for the character he felt had been “screwed over the most,” he’ll do it for his other bidder. So he writes himself into Gold’s shop, where Rumple — whose last bit of self is fading away, which will leave behind nothing but The Dark One — begins dictating the first lines of a new storybook, titled Heroes & Villains: “Once upon a time….”

What did you think of the episode “Mother”? And is Regina in fact the Fairy Tale Land character who’s been “screwed over the most”?

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