Only a few weeks of summer TV remain, so we’re celebrating August shows while we can in our latest Quotes of the Week compilation.
In the list below, we’ve gathered nearly 20 of the week’s best TV sound bites, including moments both scripted and unscripted from broadcast, cable and streaming series.
This time around, we’ve got Tanya’s brutally honest self-assessment on The White Lotus, Schmigadoon!‘s Mildred with a much lower level of self-awareness, harsh words from Mr. Corman about his young nephew and Jimmy Fallon’s cynical (but reasonable!) reaction to Andrew Cuomo’s resignation announcement.
Also featured in this week’s roundup: double doses of Ted Lasso‘s Christmas outing (revisit the episode’s best moments), Brooklyn Nine-Nine‘s final season premiere (read recap) and FBoy Island‘s finale (read post mortem), plus a rare triple dose of quotes, this time for Titans‘ return (read Episode 3 post mortem).
Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!
-
TED LASSO
Image Credit: Apple TV+ screenshot “Hold me closer, Tiny Dancer, Prancer and Vixen!”
Ted (Jason Sudeikis) has the perfect reaction when he discovers Rebecca has been invited to Elton John’s Christmas party
-
TED LASSO (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: Apple TV+ screenshot “I think you might be dying.”
Roy (Brett Goldstein) gets a whiff of Phoebe’s bad breath
-
POWER BOOK III: RAISING KANAN
Image Credit: Starz screenshot “Breathe, brother. Just breathe. You know whose kid that is?”
Marvin (London Brown) to a masked assailant, who was holding Kanan hostage, just before he successfully distracted and killed him
-
GROWN-ISH
Image Credit: Freeform screenshot “I’m not going with you. I know my strengths, and staying out past a government-enforced curfew is unfortunately not one of them. But please stay safe? Like, for real.”
Zoey (Yara Shahidi) confesses her sentiments to Aaron and the crew when they decide to protest against police brutality downtown instead of heeding the city’s curfew
-
BROOKLYN NINE-NINE
Image Credit: NBC screenshot “This was my big fear about having a child: losing my spark with my boss.”
Amy (Melissa Fumero) fears that her maternity leave has put a permanent strain on #Raymy
-
BROOKLYN NINE-NINE (Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: NBC screenshot (2) “This workplace is my family, was that not clear? Holt is my dad; [Rosa is] my mean, older sister; Amy’s my mom…”
“What?!”
“What? What did I say?”
“You said, ‘Amy is my mom.'”
“Nobody said anything! We don’t have time for this, Amy!”
Jake (Andy Samberg) is startled by his mothe—err, Amy’s (Melissa Fumero) response to his Freudian slip
-
THE HYPE
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “You gotta be in the streets. You gotta know people from the streets to be able to represent what they want, what they like and what they don’t like.”
Rapper Wiz Khalifa, in response to a white contestant ignorantly appropriating red bandana material for the sake of trendy fashion
-
THE MS. PAT SHOW
Image Credit: BET+ screenshot “You love making white people uncomfortable. Isn’t this place for you?”
Ms. Pat (Patricia “Ms. Pat” Williams) to her daughter Janelle, in response to Janelle’s complaints about her predominantly white school
-
MR. CORMAN
Image Credit: Apple TV+ screenshot “I don’t have anything against David. He’s just a bad person.”
“He’s 7!”
“You can be a bad person when you’re 7.”
Josh (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) struggles to see the good in his nephew
-
TITANS (Episode 1)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot (2) “Batman and I never waited around for the press back in Gotham.”
“Maybe that’s why the press was so bad.”
Kory (Anna Diop) nudges Dick (Brenton Thwaites) to come out of the shadows after a big win
-
TITANS (Episode 2)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot (2) “Hey, man — whatcha eating?”
“I dunno…. Gar made it, I think. Some kind of meat thing.”
“That’s Krypto’s.”
It’s a Hawk-eats-dog-food world for Hank (Alan Ritchson)
-
TITANS (Episode 3)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “Do you think this place has a big enough chandelier?”
“Hey, when bats have sex, they’ve gotta have something to hang from.”
Gar (Ryan Potter) and Hank (Alan Ritchson) survey one of Wayne Manor’s boudoirs
-
ANIMAL KINGDOM
Image Credit: TNT screenshot “It’s hard to find people to trust.”
“What, you’re saying you trust us?”
“No. I’m just saying you’re motivated.”
Lark (Chelsea Tavares) explains to Craig (Ben Robson) and the Codys that good help is hard to find — especially among criminals
-
THE WHITE LOTUS
Image Credit: HBO screenshot “At the core of the onion is a straight-up alcoholic lunatic.”
Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) confesses to Belinda that she’s worried her new boyfriend will eventually see her for who she really is
-
SCHMIGADOON!
Image Credit: Apple TV+ screenshot (2) “I’m a good person.”
“Not really. You’re kind of a controlling, judgmental a—hole.”
Melissa (Cecily Strong) calls Mildred (Kristin Chenoweth) out on her bulls—t
-
FBOY ISLAND (Episode 10)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “This is a game. They told you what I was. I’m an Fboy.”
Garrett, showing his true colors and thinking he was walking home with $100,000
-
FBOY ISLAND (Episode 10 Bonus Quote!)
Image Credit: HBO Max screenshot “Fboy? Eff off.”
Host Nikki Glaser, rightfully telling Garrett off after revealing he doesn’t get the prize money
-
THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON
Image Credit: NBC screenshot “It’s gonna be tough for Cuomo. With a track record like this, his only future is either president or Supreme Court justice.”
