Americans have three favorite pastimes: watching baseball, devouring apple pie and laughing like idiots at other people falling down. Thanks to Chrissy Teigen's dress — and one attendee's unfortunate timing — the BBMAs kicked off with one of those things, setting the tone for the night.
Taylor and Calvin, Sittin’ in a Tree
Allow us this shallow moment, please: We’re all for Taylor Swift’s Miss Independent philosophies, but if she’s getting back in the dating game with Calvin Harris, we’re on board with that, too. Just look at that sweet congratulatory hug!
For One Direction fans still mourning the departure of Zayn Malik, we’re not sure if things were made better or worse by his bandmates thanking him during their acceptance speech for Top Duo/Group. Either way, that silly 1D Twitter feud became a thing of the past when Liam said, “There’s one more person to share this with, and that’s our brother Zayn.” See? The night does change fast, indeed.
Don't Quit Your Day Jobs, Ladies!
We'd like to applaud Bachelorette "stars" Kaitlyn Bristowe and Britt Nilsson for finding a new, inventive way to annoy us: with their jokes! They intro'd Nick Jonas' "Jealous" performance by referring to their occasional feelings for one other, and we've never rolled our collective eyes harder.
A 'Beautiful' Crossover
We're a little surprised ABC was willing to give so much promo to Fox's Empire, but we're glad they did. And even though "Conqueror" was never our favorite jam, we'll take whatever we can get during this long, Cookie-free summer.
What a coincidence — this is the exact same face we made when Mariah Carey hit that last note! (Maybe she should take a cue from Britney Spears and lip sync during her Vegas stay…)
Dat Suit Doe
Who dressed Chris Brown for the BBMAs?! We can hear the stylist now: "Listen, Chris, we know you have some image problems… so we decided to dress you like the actual Devil. You cool with that?"
Ed Sheeran's One-Man Show
Sure, Ed Sheeran might be a multi-platinum recording artist, but the singer kept things low-key in his performance of “Bloodstream” (featuring Taylor Swift as audience back-up singer, of course). Using nothing more than looper pedals and an acoustic guitar, Sheeran delivered one of the strongest performances of the night. (With all due respect, Mariah.)
No shade here; we loved Britney Spears' performance of "Pretty Girls," featuring What's-Her-Name. If you traveled way back in time — you know, circa 2007 — and told us that Brit would make this big a comeback, we never would have believed you. (We would, however, like you to share with us the secrets of time-travel!)
Sam Smith's Card Game
Recovering from vocal surgery, Sam Smith was relegated to cue cards for his Top Male Artist acceptance speech. The cards ranged from sweet (genuinely thanking his fans) to inside joke-y (“Taylor [Swift], put a 100 on black for me”) to flat-out strange (“Nicki [Minaj], Oh my God, look at her bum!”) Fortunately, Smith’s song lyrics are so good, we can’t hold these Magic Marker words against him.
Danica McKellar: Rap Star?
Never have a presenter and an award been so mismatched as Danica McKellar and Best Rap Song. (Seriously, what?) Fortunately, the Wonder Years actress acknowledged the odd pairing in her endearing intro, joking that she “dreamed of someday presenting Best Rap Song at the Billboard Music Awards” back in her Winnie Cooper days. Beautiful, funny and good at math? She’s the perfect woman.
Paging Dr. Beyoncé!
Did anyone else notice that Ellen Pompeo had a little extra sass in her step when she walked out to present? You just know McDreamy was "You go girl"-ing from heaven.
Hell on Earth
We know Kanye West is a musical genius — and, as of recently, a doctor — but what was that BBMAs performance? Not only could we barely see him through the smoke and flames, but thanks to his family-friendly lyrics, about half the song was completely silenced. Then again, why would we expect anything different? Loved it.
Remembering the 'King'
Imagine Dragons may not have been the obvious choice to honor the late Ben E. King, but they quickly proved themselves the perfect one. As the band led a “Stand By Me” singalong that filled the entire MGM Grand theater, we couldn’t help holding up a lighter (or, uh, our iPhones) and joining in the tribute.
We wouldn’t blame “One to Watch” singer Tori Kelly if she’d been overcome with nerves, standing in front of that massive audience with nothing more than a spotlight and her guitar. Instead of crumbling under pressure, though, the up-and-comer delivered a mesmerizing, raw performance that rivaled a few of the pros who had taken the stage before her.