What pairs well with whiplash? Because that’s what we got — in the best possible way — from Tuesday’s episode of OWN’s The Kings of Napa. In the span of an hour, family ties were strengthened, broken and reestablished, and not one, not two but three (!) seductions went down. Who got jiggy with it — or was about to? Read on…
‘WHAT YOU HAVE HERE ARE LITERALLY SOUR GRAPES’ | Early on in “How Stella Got Her Pinot Back,” Grace reported to August that Christian’s neglect of the vines had cost the winery half a million in revenue. “You need to make a boss move,” Grace told… well, her boss. “Bring Brigette back. She is the key to your success.” So August pitched the idea to Vanessa, who having cooled off since learning about Reggie’s affair with Melanie, not only offered her niece her old job back but a real place in the family. Vanessa, who when she changes lanes, goes all the way, even invited Bridgette to accompany her to the New York wine convention. Having heard that Vanessa was on a forgiveness tour, Yvette hoped that she’d be allowed to move back into the mansion. As if, Vanessa scoffed. But if Yvette could land the winery Jason Collins as a distributor for its much-ballyhooed dessert wine, she’d reconsider.
Elsewhere on the estate, Rose buttered up Dana to convince him to go with her to a fertility clinic (where his self-pleasuring material of choice turned out to be — ha — a finance magazine). Something was troubling him, though — something that he confided only in blabbermouth Yvette. Rose was eager to bring another Dana into the world, he explained, but Dana himself… eh… He knew that there was a 50 percent chance that he could pass off the dwarfism gene, and “I don’t know if I could roll those dice.” Of course he could, Yvette assured him. He and Rose would raise that baby in love — and anyway, there could never be another Dana! Meanwhile, Christian filled in August about the evidence he’d found that suggested that Bridgette had poisoned Sean & Sean’s vines. “I think our new sister could be the extortionist,” he concluded. Hell, “she could be a crime boss.” Well, they couldn’t do anything right away, August said. They needed Otis to wake up and clear him name, or they needed to obtain more evidence. She couldn’t afford to be wrong again.
‘ALL EXTORTIONIST, NO PLAY MAKES A GIRL NEED HER MAN’ | Right on cue, Otis woke up and revealed that he’d been stealing grapes to bottle his own wine. But extorting Reggie? Nope. Not him. Going back to Quincy, August and Christian were informed that all of the calls from the extortionist had pinged a cell tower near Bridgette’s house. His suggestion for a next step: put cameras in her place. Reluctant as August was, she agreed to it. Later, though, she flashed back to a random long-ago moment when Bridgette had revealed her vindictive side and had a full-on panic attack. After Christian calmed her down, the two of them brought Dana up to speed, and the three of them shared what was surely a rare group hug. At the same time, Melanie was seeing a doctor about the kind of strange rash that probably meant she wouldn’t live out the season. Boy, will Bridgette feel crummy for kicking her out. Or maybe she won’t. At the wine convention, Vanessa acted like her new bestie — and even took her to meet her mentally ill grandmother, if only to drive home the point that Melanie used to be a wild child and was still a conniving snake.
After finding cameras pointed in her direction as well as Bridgette’s, August confronted Quincy, then Dana. He wasn’t about to apologize, though. Thanks to those cameras, he knew that she’d been looking to replace him as CFO. Yeah, she replied — to promote him! Needless to say, he could forget about that now. Upon returning from New York, Bridgette received a call from a henchman who was surprised she’d quit Sean & Sean. “Things changed,” she said. It was all under control. While selling Jason on House of Kings, Yvette also sold him on her — to the point that when Vanessa happened upon them barely clothed and all but radiating afterglow, she deduced in a heartbeat that “you clearly closed the deal.” That being the case, Yvette could move back in. That night, as August and Kelvin reminisced in the bleachers of their old high school football field, she revealed that underneath her coat, she was wearing her cheerleading uniform. Needless to say, nookie ensued.
Finally, when Bridgette and Rose arrived back at the former’s house, the winemaker confessed that she was sick of keeping secrets and blurted out that she’d known Reggie was her father for years. “I thought you found out at the reading of the will,” said Rose. And almost mid-sentence, they’d begun kissing. “You don’t need that family,” Bridgette said. “I’m your way out.” Rose said that she shouldn’t, she couldn’t, she wouldn’t… but then, what with all the kissing, she did. And all the while, Dana was watching on the hidden camera that Quincy had installed. So, what did you think of the episode’s hookups and smackdowns? Are you convinced that Bridgette is the extortionist, or do you suspect another big twist’s ahead? Hit the comments below with your theories.