Revenge Recap: Publicity Nightmare

ANA ORTIZ, MADELEINE STOWEIn this week’s Revenge, while Conrad’s new publicist, Bizzy Preston (Devious Maids’ Ana Ortiz), sets about trying to mend the rift between Emily and Victoria – good luck with that, honey! – Nolan gets a rare chance to pull off a takedown of his own. But why does he have it in for the Hamptons’ Edina Monsoon? And how does he manage to get even without donning a single neckerchief? Read on. I’ll explain.

NOL’S CORE | Early on in “Resurgence,” Nolan reveals to Emily that, to protect one of her clients ages ago, Bizzy outed him to the world – including the father with whom he was only just starting to reconnect. As a result, the two remained estranged for the last decade of Papa Ross’ life. (Aw. When Nolan’s sad, we’re all sad. Even his canary yellow pants can’t cheer him – or us – up. Am I right?) So Nolan and Emily put their heads together and (a) arrange for Bizzy to blab to Victoria that Emily was married once before (a “fact” that will pay off next week, presumably) and (b) break into Bizzy’s cell phone, learning not only all of her clients’ dirty little secrets but also her own. (No PR PR Persons Award for her!) But, rather than end both her career and her marriage, Nolan offers to remain mum about her affair – provided that she breaks it off – thereby potentially saving her marriage. “Guess my takedowns have a silver lining,” he remarks. Emily, are you taking notes?

HANGING BY A THREAT | Speaking of Ems, she and Aiden are busy trying to figure out how to handle his new order from Victoria – that he seduce his old flame – when suddenly the queen bee kicks him out of Grayson Manor and informs him that his services are no longer needed. (This, after seeing him get out of the shower! Time for glasses, Vicky.) Though a crafty minx like Emily shouldn’t be perplexed by this turn of events – Daniel asks her to let his former girlfriend, Sarah, bake their wedding cake, for Pete’s sake! – she doesn’t connect the dots and realize that Betty Crocker is Victoria’s new weapon of choice… until, that is, she sees a screen grab of her fiancé almost kissing his ex at an Independence Day clambake. (Somehow she does not respond to this by saying “D’oh!” in a Homer Simpson voice.)

FRENCH TWIST | When a date with Margaux starts to get, how you say, le hot and le heavy, Jack pulls back, prompting Frenchy to bail. Shortly thereafter, Amanda’s widower visits her grave, tearfully admits how much he misses her (don’t we all?) and finally, determined to move on with his life, removes his wedding band. This gesture seems to do the trick for him, as one apology to Margaux later, they’re going at it as if their hook-up is going to get one-tenth the attention that Nolan and Patrick’s did.

Okay, your turn. What did you think of the episode? You had to love that Nolan got to take someone down. But were you surprised that he didn’t seem to spend more time trying to make sure that Patrick was okay? Speaking of the takedown of the week, how did you like Ortiz as Bizzy? Personally, I thought she nailed it. (Then again, she’s by and large pretty awesome.) Line of the week, as usual, was one of Victoria’s: When party guest Sarah said that she was living it up like the 1 percent, Mama Warbucks scoffed, the 1 percent “of what?” Who do you think next week’s returnee is? Since Conrad has decided to write his memoirs, my money’s on Mason Treadwell. Anyway, your turn. Hit the comments!