Penultimate True Blood Recap: One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

You know how nuts Russell always seems on True Blood? Well, in Sunday’s episode, Bill seemed even crazier (though, regrettably, without the twisted sense of humor that makes Russell such a guilty pleasure). After being told by Lilith that there could be only one vampire leader and “I choose you, Pikachu,” Chancellor Compton ordered Jessica to turn Jason into a fanger. And that was just for starters!

HEAD CASE | Rather than do as she was told, Bill’s progeny warned Jason that Russell was coming after his sister and her scrumdiddlyumptious fairy blood, then went into hiding at Fangtasia. Unfortunately, Tara’s assassination of Sheriff Elijah led his maker – surprise! Barb from Cougar Town! – straight to the bar. Quicker than you could say “type OMG,” Pam had taken the rap for her baby vamp and gotten arrested, and Jess had been dragged back to Authority HQ. There, Bill decked – actually decked! – his “child” and, jealous that Lilith was also telling Chancellor Kibwe that he was “the one,” beheaded his rival. Little did he know that the fickle nudie goddess was also delivering the same message to Salome…

BROTHERS & SISTERS | Speaking of Salome, she intuited that Nora was having second thoughts about the whole eating-the-world thing. And, though Still Not Kate Beckinsale insisted that she was as gung ho as ever, she was actually no longer gung nor ho. In fact, she had so come to her senses that she ran right to “sibling” Eric for some make-up sex. (Wouldn’t you?) Later, the quick-thinking Viking risked bringing down the wrath of the Pentagon on the Authority by killing a visiting general. This, we quickly realized, was his scheme to bust himself and Nora out of HQ: They’d go cover everything up, they said, and glamour everybody into forgetting about the damning video footage the government obtained of Russell and Steve sucking a frat house dry.

GRIM FAIRY TALE | Hoping to learn more about the mysterious Warlo to whom she was promised, Sookie questioned a gorgeously back-lit fairy elder – Coco from Fame! Alas, she only wanted to perform interpretive dance and discuss what a bad speller Ke$ha is. Later, though, after Jason’s attempt to protect Sookie from Russell failed somewhere half-past utterly – the crafty vamp glamoured him into being his and Steve’s guide to the fairy Studio 54 – the elder stepped up and took on the fangers… disastrously. Russell drank her down to the last drop and, in his heightened state of awareness, was able to see the entrance to Club Fae.

WHAT’S NUDES | Caught naked and human at Authority HQ, Luna allowed herself to be thrown in, for lack of a better term, the pantry (with all the other two-legged snack food), so that she could be close to Emma, whose kennel was next door. Meanwhile, Sam – unaware of how far around the bend Bill has gone – volunteered to be served immediately to his buddy from Bon Temps.

THE GOOD, THE DAD AND THE UGLY | When not chopping wood shirtless, Alcide busied himself by accusing his dad – the T-1000 from Terminator 2! – of stealing from his old pack. Later, though, the duo bonded when they stopped an attack on a neighbor by a pack of baby vamps.

PREGNANT PAUSE | So long after it happened that we almost forgot it happened, Holly got her boys to apologize to Andy for posting a picture of his bare butt on Facebook. The kids even seemed (almost, kinda) willing to give their mom’s beau a chance. So, of course, a scene later, Maurella was explaining to the sheriff that she looked extremely pregnant because she is extremely pregnant – with his magical baby!

So, what did you think of the episode? Is Bill beyond redemption? Were you hoping Jessica really would turn Jason into a vampire? And how clear is it that Jess was right on the money when she suggested that maybe, just maybe Tara was into her maker? (We even got the feeling the feeling was mutual.) Your comments below.