The TVLine-Up: TV Worth Watching Wednesday

On your TV this Wednesday: The X Factor gives singers the Boot, the Middle mom moves out, Morgan eyeballs Prentiss, and the 10 o’clock hour gets freaky. The people have spoken and we’re staying daily* with the TVLine-Up, so here now our picks for the day.

* IMPORTANT NOTE: With a new era comes new parameters. In its daily incarnation, the TVLine-Up will of course flag big premieres and finales as well as cite “noteworthy” regular episodes of a series (i.e. those that we know or have heard to be standouts, boast interesting guest stars, or possess some other intangible “fun” factor). And during these first weeks of the fall, I’ll also invite you to give new shows a second look. Lastly, my lawyer says that as the author, I am also entitled to lob out the occasional wild card, just because.

8 pm Survivor: South Pacific (CBS) | “A castaway turns on his alliance and teams up with an unlikely tribe member,” CBS tells us, because you can’t write that tease for just any Survivor episode.

8 pm The X Factor (Fox) | With auditions now complete, hopefuls head to Los Angeles for the first round of “Boot Camp.”

8 pm Up All Night (NBC) | Ohh, so this is the episode where Reagan and Chris shop for a family-friendly car? Elsewhere, Ava resolves to address more serious topics on her show, only to quickly find out what a drag that can be.

8 pm The Middle (ABC) | Hello, Goodbye Girl! Fed up by her family’s latest mortifying gaffe, Frankie moves out and moves in with her mom (played by Marsha Mason).

8:30 pm Suburgatory (ABC) | Tessa can’t live with herself when she starts falling hard for neighbor lady Ana Gasteyer’s jock of a son, while George is charged with cooking up an epic barbeque for the neighborhood.

X Factor‘s Simon and L.A. Talk ‘Humbling’ Ratings, Weak Groups, and How Much ‘Pretty’ Matters

9 pm Criminal Minds (CBS) | Prentiss must complete recertification training, and under Morgan’s watchful eye, no less. Max Martini (The Unit) guest stars.

9 pm Modern Family (ABC) | Jay helps Manny with his school fundraiser gift wrap sale (eliciting a knowing groan from yours truly), while Claire begins her multi-episode clash with City Hall and guest star David Cross (Arrested Development).

9:30 pm Happy Endings (ABC) | Alex’s cute line of slogan t-shirts for babies (e.g. “Put Me to Bed”) become inappropriately popular with teen girls — and with, apparently, Penny here.

9:30 pm Raising Hope (Fox) | ‘Tis true, a bonus episode this week! In Las Vegas for her cousin Delilah’s (Amy Sedaris) wedding, Virginia laments that she and Burt never had a fancy ceremony. An officiating Elvis is “fancy”?

Connie Britton: American Horror Story Will ‘Transcend’ Viewers’ Perception of Horror

10 pm CSI (CBS) | While on a date, Stokes realizes that a piece of art at an exhibit has decomposing body parts in it. So… no second date?

10 pm Law & Order: SVU (NBC) | Kyle MacLachlan (Twin Peaks) and Paige Turco (I’ll go with Party of Five) play a well-heeled political couple whose son and housekeeper’s son are both suspected of raping a young girl.

10 pm Revenge (ABC) | “Daniel reveals a part of himself that Emily finds very attractive.” Hey, now! Oh, and: Max Martini (The Unit) guest stars on this one, too.

10 pm American Horror Story (FX) | Are you ready for this? Like, really ready? In this piece of far-out fare from Glee‘s Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk, Dylan McDermott and Connie Britton play slightly estranged marrieds who move with their daughter into a very strange house that has hosted myriad grisly murders dating back decades. But it has an updated kitchen! Academy Award winner Jessica Lange and True Blood‘s Denis O’Hare costar as an overly friendly (and yet not at all friendly) neighbor and a previous, disfigured resident of the house, respectively. (We don’t know yet who’s playing the creepy dude in the rubber gimp suit.)

10 pm Penn and Teller Tell a Lie (Discovery) | This new “interactive” series has Penn and Teller presenting seven unbelievable facts — such as, “A human hair can lift a Mustang” or “A butter knife can stop a speeding bullet” — then go on to prove that only one of them is a big, fat lie. Viewers at home can play along online to guess which truth is bogus.

10 pm South Park (Comedy Central) | Season 15 resumes with Cartman suspecting that he has “A** Burger Syndrome” — and based on clips, that might not be a malapropism.

10:30 pm Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time (Comedy Central) | The Season 2 premiere of the sketch series includes a parody of 16 and Pregnant and an infomercial for an unorthodox way to get better abs.

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