Wednesday night’s episode of Survivor: Redemption Island played out so predictably that it bordered on suspenseful. Crazy, I know, but also kinda true. I can’t be the only one who kept thinking, “It’s just too easy for the Ometepe Six to wipe out the final two members of Zapatera. Surely someone somewhere somehow is going to shake things up.” But nope, neither Steve nor Ralph could get any blindside traction — even after trying to convince Natalie and Ashley that Ometepe’s three ladies could team up with them to oust Rob, Phillip, and Grant, and still have the numbers to knock out the former Zapateras. It would’ve been priceless to see how/if Boston Rob managed that kind of mutiny, but right now his control of the game is simply too absolute, and the furry farmer and concave NFL vet paid the price in back-to-back eliminations.
On the subject of blindsides, however, Rob gave serious consideration to sparing a Zapatera and ousting Andrea, who made the foolish error of expressing regret in front of her alliance members over their blindside of Matt. Yes, her regret was only “on a human level,” but these are the kinds of emotions better left unexpressed in the Survivor-verse. I loved that Grant had enough brainpower at Day 30 to recognize the value of choosing Rob and Andrea to share his cake reward after the immunity challenge: Why give the lowest member of the Ometepe totem pole any reason to doubt her status? And I found it a little amusing that Steve almost saved himself by lazing around and complaining about his hunger, but felt the sting of Rob’s axe for attempting to get some strategy going.
Also interesting: The “surprise” second immunity challenge — a classic “match the sequence of Jeff’s tiles” game — tested the remaining eight island-goers on their mental alertness, yet only Boston Rob was able to get past Round One.
Before we get to this week’s poll question, a couple other highlights:
* Anyone else surprised that Phillip didnt truly accept Steve’s post-Rice War olive branch. “I didn’t feel it was totally genuous [sic],” huffed Crazy McLooniepants.
* Quote of the night (after Phillip found his hidden shorts): “Don’t mess with the undercover specialist because he makes his living uncovering truth!”
* I didn’t know whether to chuckle or say a little prayer for Matt after his tearful admission that he couldn’t understand why God was allowing him to stay on Redemption Island and in the game (accompanied by an angelic chorus) (subtle, CBS!). Later, after Matt and Mike survived another day in the game over Julie via a rousing game of shuffleboard (seriously?), we got his bon mot from Jeff: “God wants you here whether you wanna be here or not!”
All right, Survivor buffs. Vote in the poll below, then sound off on last night’s episode in the comments. Can Rob be stopped? Is there any way Andrea’s not the next one on the chopping block? Who’s likeliest to be the last one standing at Redemption Island? Sound off below, and for all my reality recaps, follow me on Twitter @MichaelSlezakTV!