Yee-haw! American Idol went to Austin, TX, tonight and served up cowboy hats and cattle and armadillos and every other Texas-esque cliché imaginable. Except Texas toast. I didn’t see Texas toast. (Disappointing, right?) But who cares about the very frayed thread of location that holds together so many audition packages? None of it matters unless the singing makes Steven Tyler utter an expletive. Unfortunately, I’m not sure any of the 11 folks we saw getting Golden Tickets tonight are destined for the confetti shower that most recently rained down on Lee DeWyze. Oh, sure, “Spastic Melodica Guy” was fun to watch, and the blonde country chick proved there’s still life for Janelles on Idol (something that seemed inconceivable after Janell Wheeler‘s season 9 flameout). But most of tonight’s successful auditioners stood out more for their personalities than their voices: “J.Lo Booty Boy,” “Chicken Cluck Girl,” “Authentic Cowboy/Mama’s Boy,” all of ’em had talent, sure, but the next incarnation of Kelly Clarkson? I’ve got my doubts. That said, I think it’s worth keeping an eye on dishy Nick Fink (who auditioned with girlfriend Jacqueline Dunford): Something about that guy says future 90210 hottie, if not future recording superstar. Oh don’t look at me like that, even Steven Tyler said he was beautiful!
Anyhow, I’m gonna turn the mute button on myself and get Kraken crackin’ on my full episode recap (look for it in the morning right here at TVLine.com). Did you enjoy the Austin auditions? Who was your favorite hopeful? And who didn’t deserve a Golden Ticket but got one anyway? Head down to the comments section and sound off.
What’s more, if you have some strong thoughts or opinions on anything you saw this week on Idol — pertaining to judges, contestants, trends or conspiracy theories — and you’d like to share them on the next episode of TVLine’s new Idol-related Web series, Idoloonies, email a paragraph or two to firstname.lastname@example.org (and be sure to include a contact phone number). We’ll be selecting a handful of readers each week to join me in cohosting the Webcast via Skype or iChat (to tape on Friday afternoons). We’ll also be choosing a Twitter Question of the Week, so don’t hesitate to fire your best shots to me @MichaelSlezakTV. Be sure to tag it #Idoloonies!