“I guarantee you Fitz’s life would be a million times worse if you hadn’t rigged that election,” Jake told Olivia at the top of Scandal‘s 100th episode. “Yours too.”
But was he right?
Honestly, that depends on your definition of the word “worse.” Sure, everyone in this new reality seemed totally miserable, but aren’t they anyway? Here’s a quick — but by no means uncomplicated — rundown of what everyone’s lives would be like had Defiance not helped Fitz win the election:
* Olivia (and her bangs!) would almost go on a date with Leo — yes, Abby’s Leo — only to be interrupted by a newly divorced Fitz, who would give her the emotional proposal “Olitz” fans have dreamt about for the better part of a decade. After marrying Olivia in a lavish ceremony, Fitz would go on to host The Grant Report. And after work? Why, he’d grab drinks with his good pal Jake Ballard, of course! … But this idyllic existence wouldn’t last forever. Before long, Liv and Fitz’s relationship would devolve into a bitter, sexless nightmare, one they’d both have to work on. Like, really hard.
* With no post-Defiance mess to clean up, Rowan wouldn’t become the key player in his daughter’s life that he is in our reality — but in true Rowan fashion, he’d keep an eye on her from a safe, creepy distance. He would, however, inject himself into Mellie’s presidential campaign by presenting her with naughty photos of Sally Langston’s husband getting a yum-yum from some crispy piggy. (Remember him? And remember when Sally killed him? Good times.)
* Quinn would still go by her birth name, Lindsey Dwyer, and would be crushing the competition on a Bachelor-esque reality show. (Huck, naturally, would be Lindsey D.’s biggest fan, and all references to her “torture” tendencies would go way over his big, curly head.) An appearance from Lindsey on The Grant Report would lead to a sexy encounter with Fitz in his greenroom — and by “sexy encounter,” I mean he’d get drunk, she’d start to go downtown, then he’d scream at her to leave. (For Fitz, that’s like the romantic equivalent of dinner and dancing.)
* Cyrus would still be a total closet case, much to the dismay of James — who would still be alive. A distraught Mellie would take advantage of Cyrus’ good nature, introducing the grossest Scandal kiss since that time Huck spit on Quinn in the parking garage. Grosser still, the two would get married. (And while Mellie would later claim that she didn’t know… come on, girl.)
This journey down What Could Have Been Blvd., which Olivia apparently imagined in its entirety, inspired her to make a dramatic walk to Fitz on the balcony: “I’m in.”
Your thoughts on Scandal‘s highly anticipated “what if” episode? Grade it below, then drop a comment with your full review.