For the average person, frozen mini tacos can only be considered foreplay if the evening is building toward putting on sweatpants, watching some TV and vowing to make better decisions regarding the container of arugula turning to black sludge in the back of the fridge.
But when The Good Wife‘s Alicia Florrick thinks she’s about to go to town on some tortilla-wrapped goodness — only to have it whisked away by an unwelcome intrusion from her estranged hubby’s security team — the burning desire apparently runs so deep that it might drive her to an act that ends with Eli Gold witnessing her post-sex glow.
To put it in mathematical terms: Alicia + Jason Crouse – mini tacos (- the aforementioned smoldering investigator) = Alicia/Peter – undergarments x post-coital nonchalance.
Yep, #TeamFlorrick is no longer exclusively political, but I’m not sure I’m willing to go out on a limb and call it personal, either. I mean, at the end of their quickie, Alicia is declaring that “it’s always sexier not to care” — because “sex is sexier without love.” I’d feel badly for Peter, but let’s not act like he’s not 100 percent complicit in the “I’ve got 20 minutes if you’ve got 20 minutes” commerce of it all.
If that’s not “Wait, what, whoa!” enough for you, there’s more craziness in an episode that’s not only a vast improvement over last week, but a terrific hour on its own merits: Jackie dropping wince-inducing inappropriateness, a Peter-Jason face-to-face and the introduction of the undeniably enjoyable Vanessa L. Williams as a possible campaign donor/love interest for Eli.
HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY CHOOSE BETWEEN THESE TWO LEGENDS? You must be a monster! (I kid, I kid!) In any event, let’s carry on:
TORN BETWEEN TWO SUITORS | Oh, no, this isn’t the paragraph about Alicia’s feelings for Peter and Jason (more on that in a moment). Rather, I’m talking about our protagonist’s first week on the Chicago Election Board — where her nemesis Frank Landau doesn’t waste a moment getting into her ear and reminding her of their agreed-upon stipulation for her new post: “No on the first vote – don’t forget!” Turns out, it’s a referendum on whether to renew the board’s contract with KLT (we later learn the company has ties to Landau’s wife) or switch to Swan Systems (which is partly owned by Landau’s Board rival Craig Hallman, a man who feels very comfortable yelling, “You bought her!” the minute he thinks Alicia will align with Frank. Both men pay her ominous visits — Landau’s “you can recover from being physically hurt” proving to be the more threatening of the two — but in the end, the Board’s newest member isn’t sure she has enough facts to break the tie. We’re left with a cliffhanger in which Alicia can break the very word that put her into a position of power, or vote “No,” fulfill her duty and compromise her integrity on the panel right from the jump-off. All things being equal, I’m betting she aligns with Landau, but then again (as we’ll discuss below), Alicia 2.0 is totally zen — and not about to lose her cool just because some dude is melting down like the Wicked Witch getting sloshed with a bucket of dishwater.
AND JASON MAKES THREE | Alicia invites Jason to her home office for a discussion “of everything,” and promptly shows off her margarita-making skills. She needs the liquid courage, though, to ask her new freelance employee/new crush to sign a release of liability — a necessary evil given his violent past. She can’t look at him when she’s making her request, and Jason’s clearly conflicted, too. “I don’t like signing things,” he offers, but then, almost immediately, he signs it — clearing the way for Alicia to ask “Would you like…” and finally conclude that it’s best to begin with mini tacos.
Little does she know, however, that Eli has told Peter’s campaign that the Governor can move back to Alicia’s apartment — the better to disprove a media report saying the Florricks have not shard a bed for three years. And he arrives with his entire team at the exact moment Alicia and Jason are about to devour
each other some delicious Mexican food. The men are almost too polite. Alicia is relegated to spectator in her own love life. But after Jason makes a quick exit, Alicia asks her estranged spouse if he wants to get laid. He’s tempted by a phone call from a donor that’ll mean “another million dollars” — but seeing as how the pair only have 20 minutes free, Alicia zings back, “Which do you want more?” And as the clothes come off, we have our answer. It’s just too bad Eli busts into the room as the couple is getting dressed — leaving him wondering if Alicia understands she’s literally sleeping with his enemy. The “new Alicia,” however, is not going to be provoked, she explains — unless said provocation is happening in bed (nudge-nudge).
COURTING COURTNEY | Vanessa L. Williams shows up as big-money donor Courtney Boalt, and an unexpectedly flustered Eli — attempting to dismiss rumors of Alicia and Peter’s distance — invites her to Grace’s birthday dinner (no matter that the kid isn’t turning a year older ’til March). While Courtney and Grace bond over politics and religion, Jackie and Howard bust in to announce their engagement (!) and to provide a groan-inducingly clueless commentary. (Sample quote, from Jackie to Courtney: “It was so nice spending time with you, Ms. Page. You are an inspiration to all urban children.” Exhibit B: “The pleasure is all mine: I like Peter’s African-American friends!” (Can’t Peter’s campaign afford to send Jackie on an around-the-globe year-long vacay?) Courtney, though, isn’t perturbed in the least. “Don’t worry so much!” she tells Eli, who looks a wee bit smitten. It’s the same advice he got from Alicia earlier in the day — and so maybe that means it’s true.
With that said, I turn it over to you. What did you think of this week’s Good Wife? Are you with me that this was a huge step forward from last Sunday’s too-silly hour? Sound off in the comments!