Quotes of the Week From Survivor, Penny Dreadful, black-ish and More

quotes of the week

Temperatures are finally feeling summer-y — but nothing’s cooler than TVLine’s Quotes of the Week (if we do say so ourselves).

This time around we’ve got butter and bacon (thanks to Orphan Black and black-ish), Jeff Probst’s therapy confession on Survivor, some old-fashioned misogyny on The Good Wife, a geography lesson on The Goldbergs and much, much more.

So click through the gallery below for the full rundown — then hit the comments to share your thoughts and share any goodies we inevitably missed!

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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  1. Beth says:

    Just to let you know there is a tiny error in the Grey’s quote :)

  2. aurat22 says:

    Personally I thought the funniest quote on Once came from Emma to evil dwarf: “Put that down or I”ll change your name to “Stumpy.”

  3. theschnauzers says:

    Y’all always leave out Outlander — Heavens knows they always have something quotable. This weekend’s episode had “Shall we begin?” from Black Jack Randall, perhaps the chilliest closing line of an episode ever.

  4. Lisa says:

    It’s kinda sad that Rayna was killed right when her character was getting REALLY interesting.

  5. Yunuem says:

    You missed the vampire diaries when Damon kiled Kai “heads it is”

  6. Marius says:

    Barry: “Nice haircut. And I see we’ve abandoned our traditional green.” Oliver: “Trying something different.” (Flash)

    Esther: “Let me guess–you brought me back to torture me.”
    Elijah: “My dear mother, we simply need your blood, but if should suffer horribly, I can’t promise I won’t enjoy it immensely.” (Originals)

    “When everything you love has been stolen from you, consider my story as you embark on your own journey of revenge. And always remember: What goes around, comes around.” (Amanda, Revenge)

    “I don’t cross the line. I put myself on it.” (Kate Beckett, Castle)

    Mark: “Stick it in fast, it will hurt less.”
    Sarah: “God, you must be one hell of a first date.” (Orphan Black)

    “Well played Ams…..well played!” (Nolan, final ep Revenge)

    “-I am a cop
    -Let me see your badge.
    -Feel my boob.
    -I’m sorry, what?
    -My badge is in my bra.
    -The other boob.
    -So, where do you keep your gun?
    -Don’t push it.
    (Mysteries of Laura, Laura & Steve Guttenberg)

  7. Mik says:

    I’m surprised Hector’s (Richard Cabral) speech in his job interview in American Crime didn’t make it on. I thought that was very powerful.

  8. Mr. Tran K says:

    John Oliver was freakin’ hilarious when he said about Mother’s Day.

  9. Ray says:

    You mean you missed, “I’m the guy who kills Gordon.” From Mack on Agents of SHIELD? That line was very nearly as awesome as Fitz’s.

    • Jerri says:

      Perhaps, but I laughed a lot at the “Science, Biatch” line, it’s the delivery plus the fact that it came from Fitz.

  10. O.M. says:


  11. Cobra says:

    There were endless great quotes in GMW this week, including the one you chose:
    “We’re going to go to your favorite restaurant and take all the rolls.
    They want you to take the rolls!”
    Riley and Maya doing the Feeny call.
    “It’s not pronounced Stupid Town.
    How is it pronounced?
    Saint Upid Town.
    How Saint Upid of me.”
    and many many more

  12. Ally_D says:

    My favorite quote of the week is Rogelio’s alarm tone from Jane the Virgin: “it’s another beautiful day to be Rogelio, wake up Rogelio”. Genuinely, I was rolling around on the couch at that one for at least 5 minutes with tears of laughter streaming down my face!!!

    JTV is my (unexpected) favorite new show of the year. I am in love with Gina Rodriguez and there isn’t an episode where Jaime Camil doesn’t crack me up.

    Off now to download Rogelio to be my morning alarm call!