This week on ABC’s Once Upon a Time, we not only found out why the Wicked Witch is green, but also what her reality-changing endgame is. Plus: Regina gives Robin Hood her heart, and the Wizard of Oz is revealed!
IN THE OZ THAT WAS…. | When a couple finds a baby in the wake of a twister, they name her Zelena and bring her home to Oz. Alas, Dad is none too fond of his daughter’s “wicked” powers, so grown Zelena goes off to see the “great and terrible” Wizard to get answers about her past. The Wizard shows how Cora abandoned Zelena as a baby, then gave birth to Regina to attain royalty status. When Zelena witnesses Rumple teaching young Regina magic, she wants in, so the Wizard gives her silver slippers to click three times to travel to The Enchanted Forest. There, Rumple warns Regina’s sister not to be so envious, as she is literally turning green. And when Zelena goes to kill Regina — only to discover it was a ruse — Rumple says he will no longer train her, as she is disqualified from enacting his curse. “Next time you will choose me,” Zelena warns, before using the slippers to return to Oz.
IN STORYBROOKE…. | After Neal’s funeral, everyone gathers at Granny’s, where Tink busts Regina’s chops about meeting her soul mate but doing nothing about it, while Hook suggests to Emma that he spend some time with Henry to share stories about his dad. After Henry (conveniently) is gone, Zelena shows up to visit her “little sister” and announce a showdown at sundown. Seeking to confirm the Wicked Witch’s family ties, Regina digs up an old letter that upsets her, and which she later shares with a compassionate Robin Hood. The letter was from Rumple, hailing Cora’s firstborn as the most powerful sorceress he has ever seen — words that Regina oftentimes in the past would revisit, for a morale boost. But now she realizes he was referring to Zelena, and that if his assessment is true, “There’s no way I can win this fight.”
Meanwhile by the docks, Hook attempts to teach Henry how to use a sextant (“Like GPS?”/”Aye”), just as he taught Bae, er, Neal, when he was a boy, er, um, whoops. Henry’s now like, “Cut the s–t, oddly dressed man,” and Hook boils the lesson down to this: Neal lost his dad, too, at the same age you are now. You have more in common than you realize.
Come sundown, Zelena arrives on Main Street ready to rumble, unimpressed with the “savior’s” attempt to step in. Regina finally shows, witch-slaps her green menace, but then starts getting tossed around like a rag doll, ultimately getting hurled up and through the clock tower face. Zelena then goes to pluck her heart… only it’s not there. Regina then crushes her foe with this splendid verbal beat-down: “My mother always taught me, ‘Never bring your heart to a witch fight’ — something you’d know if she hadnt abandoned you.” Defeated, for now, Zelena flies off on her broom, while Regina and the Charmings can only wonder what the Wicked Witch plans to brew with ingredients such as a heart and courage.
Later, Regina meets up with Robin Hood, who was standing guard over her heart in the forest. She explains how she had the idea to use the one asset Zelena never had access to — Cora — to thwart her, this time at least. But to be safe, Regina gives her heart to Robin Hood, to safeguard. He reminds her that she still owes him that drink, an idea that, judging by her smile, she seems more amenable to now.
Meanwhile in the storm cellar, Rumple taunts Zelena that if he could do it all over again, he’d still choose to mentor Regina. Zelena counters, “We’ll see about that,” because she’s not out to cast just a curse. She’s looking for a “second chance.” And in the final Oz flashback, we see her ask the Wizard to turn back time, but he says that’s impossible. Zelena then tears away the curtain, revealing a fumbling carny from Kansas — Walsh! Having no need for him in that form, she turns him inco an obedient flying monkey, vowing to find a way back in time so that Regina is never even born.
* “Perhaps I could talk to him?” “About what, leather conditioner and eyeliner?”
* “This isn’t the Wild West.” “No, dearie, it’s the Wicked West.”
* “I think my mother would have told me if she had a love child with the scarecrow.”
* “Out of my way, munchkin.” “I’m a dwarf.” “That’s even worse.”