Quotes of the Week: Best Zingers From Modern Family, Nine-Nine, Reign, Sherlock & More

Give us a Q! Give us an O! Actually, just give us TVLine’s Quotes of the Week, already!

Yes indeed, we’ve rounded up the small screen’s best zingers, one-liners and retorts from the last seven days — all for your sweet, low-calorie enjoyment.

RELATED | Who Is TVLine’s Performer of the Week?

This time around, we’ve got a double dose of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, some Arrow bitchiness, a Sherlock clarification, a biology lesson from Ellen and much more. So click through the gallery below for our latest batch of honorees, then hit the comments to weigh in on your faves — and add anything we’ve inevitably missed!

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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22 Comments
  1. dude says:

    Claire Holt is magic.

  2. Pedro says:

    Brooklyn Nine-Nine makes me laugh a lot every week, glad it appeared twice on the list!

  3. shuayb says:

    Claire has always had great zingers… Violet is on fire. Wait till the. Xmas special! Brilliant!

  4. LOST says:

    I’m from Macedonia and I’m wondering how many of you actually know where Macedonia is?

    • LOST says:

      + in the Cyrillic alphabet V goes after B.

    • EJ386 says:

      Former Yugoslavia, above Greece. Greece has a region called Macedonia, so they couldn’t join the EU as Macedonia, but joined as the former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia. Every European above 25 will know this I think.

      • Robert says:

        LOST was probably quizzing us “dumb Americans” but I assure you, there are plenty of us who know where Macedonia is too.

        **To be fair, while I did know they were not allowed to join the EU under the name Macedonia due to the Greek region of the same name, I thought they simply joined as the Republic of Macedonia. Totally missed the “former Yugoslav” part, so thank you for correcting my error!

        • LOST says:

          Well, that’s the Greek side of the story. Actually Macedonia was divided between Serbia, Bulgaria and Greece in the Balkan Wars in 1913. We could join the EU if Greece accepted our name as Macedonia, but if they do , we’ll have the right to get back the part of land that was given to them in the Balkan Wars. That’s why they’re saying that Macedonia is Greek, just like they’re saying Alexander the Great is Greek. Here, he’s known by the name of “Александар Македонски” (Alexander the Macedonian).

        • EJ386 says:

          Your welcome. I must say reading the comment my first thought was ‘this person feels quite superior’. I didn’t want to assume though… I feel a better person knowing I wasn’t the only one.

  5. Eran says:

    Nick Zano???? That wasn’t Jason Ritter?!?! Holy doppelganger, Batman!

  6. ibjbyron says:

    How about Conan O’Brien referencing NBC airing the olympics, saying they’ll, “…finally get to show someone who’s okay with passing the torch.”

  7. tp says:

    These are some pretty good quotes this week.

  8. Parker says:

    Thanks for including that quote from Cougar Town. :)
    Busy Philipps is my favorite part of that show!

  9. faraway says:

    what’s this? where’s Fusco: I wonder if we could take Fort Knox. or Finch’s “We’ve made a terrible mistake.”

  10. Amanda says:

    My favorite Sherlock quote is from John Watson to Mary:
    The problems of your past are your problem. The problems of your future are my privilege.

  11. Stefan says:

    From Chicago PD:
    – Hey, the girl who’s in the hospital, her mother’s downstairs.
    – All right, bring her up.
    – I’m assuming that’s Spanish for you’re gonna go down there and get her yourself.

  12. Bob Johnson says:

    What would Ellen know about making babies?

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