Mistresses Recap: Truth and Consequences

Mistresses RecapThey say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

On Monday’s Mistresses, however, Karen (who puts the “lose” in “delusional”) offered an alternate viewpoint: Insanity is going into a deposition, ignoring even the most mundane details of your lawyer’s instructions and confessing to a wide variety of professional malpractice and personal misdeeds — while implicating yourself in a possible felony — just so you can turn the shank-eye on your romantic rival, flip your silky cascade of hair and sigh, “And now my conscience is clear — I doubt you can say the same.”

Oh, Karen, it’s all well and good that you’re taking the moral high road in your battle against that ice-blonde beyotch Elizabeth Gray, but what’s the point when said road is leading straight to the state pen?!

Anyhow, despite being out of the country on vacation, I feel obligated to attempt to finish out recapping duties on my second-favorite summer series of all time (right behind American Idol). So let’s cut to this week’s shenanigans while keeping it way wayyyy briefer than uzh.

KAREN | Our graduate of the University of Southern California at Self-Destruction got stupid honest during her aforementioned deposition, torpedoing her romantic prospects with hot business partner Jacob and hot insurance investigator Anthony Newsome in the process.  I don’t know why Karen is poisoning the waters with the torrid twosome while acting like a hurt teen with Elizabeth’s stalker son Sam, but perhaps there’s a naughty conjugal-visit fantasy in play?

SAVI | At Joss’ urging, Harry tries to sneak a peek at Savi’s paternity test results, but not even his flawless blonde locks and Aussie accent can crack the flustered receptionist. Savi, meanwhile, after getting set up by Dom on a cushy trip to NYC, wonders if she has any reason to fight her feelings for her ragingly hot coworker/possible baby daddy — especially since her estranged ex doesn’t seem like he’s that into her.

APRIL | Despite breaking up on account of Richard’s fistfight with her not-actually-dead spouse, April and Richard spend a day at an amusement park with their BFF daughters and wind up reconciling — and presumably sharing churros — by day’s end.

JOSS | Oh dear. Joss literally translates new girlfriend Alex’s innuendo-stuffed chat about craving meat into an excuse to have on-the-job sex with dashing French boss Olivier. Needless to say, Alex responds with all the exasperation and hurt of a Pug who’s just had her bowl of kibble hurled unceremoniously into the backyard. Is it insane of me to think this is headed for a threeway (or fourway, if you count Joss’ magnificent lion tank top)?

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

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  1. Katy says:

    I’m so tired of Joss either leave Alex and screw your boss or don’t.

  2. Leola65 says:

    I love the actress who plays Karen, but her storyline is just awful.

    • Rook says:

      I think its great, I love all the twist that keep happening. Plus its a lot better than Aprils fake dead husband storyline.

    • Leo says:

      I find myself rooting at Karen when she uttered that awesome line. I think in the end, the wife’s gonna drop the charge before the whole murder charge backfires at her face. And Karen will finally lose her license but Hot Jacob will be around for her. I’m really excited to see how the writers wrap it up.
      April and Paul are just so sweet and it’s very nice to see them un-break up. I hope Lucy just went to see Selena Gomez again. I will hate to see her relationship with her mother go south if she found out about her dad.
      Joss and Harry’s scene is great and the way Harry tries to use his charms to get the results is hilarious.
      I find myself fast-forwarding Joss’ scene with not only Alex but also Olivier. But the scenes she shares with Savi are really really good.
      Finale next week? I’m so desperate. Please renew it ABC!!! I need to watch some train wrecks so I can feel better lol.

  3. hey says:

    I missed the “not brief” recap! I find it hilarious! Thanks though I always enjoy reading your work :)

  4. Babygate says:

    I have to admit that I’m becoming disillusioned with where this show is going. The only ones acting remotely normal are April and Richard which, BTW, have become my faves. From the get go, I found Karen’s storyline to be distasteful. I get that she fell in love, but actually having sex with her ex-lover’s son is beyond creepy. And now she’s confessed. Good for her. She deserves whatever she has coming. Hopefully this god-awful storyline will now be over. So, now Savi has feelings for Dom? I thought it was just an attraction. And she’s not even trying to save her marriage. That’s just wrong. Harry is hot and he loves her. And Joss…what are you doing with Alex? There’s absolutely no chemistry between the two of them, at all. Not even as friends, let alone romantically. They shouldn’t be together. Joss acting like cheating on the person you are in a relationship with is not a big deal, is really disturbing. Alex should have stood up better but instead she just stormed out like a whinny kid. Olivier is a creeper. He had no interest in Joss until he found out she was with Alex. She needs to be single and grow up.

    • Mary says:

      In Savi’s defense Harry made it clear that if the baby she’s carrying is not his then their marriage is over. Whereas Dominic is not issuing ultimatums and is simply trying to take care of Savi. I am still hoping for a Savi/Harry reconciliation, but I understand the Dominic attraction.

      • the girl says:

        Exactly. It’s not crazy for Savi to wish that Harry had not put conditions on their reconciliation, especially pertaining to the baby’s paternity, which is out of her control at this point. Savi also has no room to fight him on his stance, because he wouldn’t have to consider divorce if she had never cheated in the first place (or had at least used a condom!).

        • Babygate says:

          But Savi could have opened that envelope and find out once and for all. Instead, she is, by default, allowing Harry to drift away because he doesn’t know if the baby is his. So in essence, she’s not fighting for her marriage because the longer she waits, the further Harry is going to drift away. She doesn’t have to force him, she can just put an end to the nonsense by revealing the paternity of the baby.

          • Connie says:

            She has said, though, that the only reason Harry would go back to her would be for the baby and not for her, and she doesn’t want that.

  5. Grace says:

    Anyone else notice the lady’s computer at Genzide said the result of the paternity test was positive? Should mean Harry’s the baby daddy after all since he’s the sample Savi sent in, right?

    • Nerwen Aldarion says:

      Not necessarily. They just have the results, it could exclude him.

    • Amanda says:

      I was more curious as to why a receptionist in the middle of an office lobby can access confidential results at all. Just doesn’t seem the place to give people life changing news.

  6. Chablis says:

    Any news if ABC will renew?

    • Connie says:

      I don’t think so, but ABC did extend the actors’ options for another year, which seems that a renewal could be likely.

  7. DavidSask says:

    The only interesting storyline is Alyssa’s the others are dragged out and need to end before and if a second season is deserved!!!

  8. GeoDiva says:

    The Karen Kim trainwreck continues!

  9. moni says:

    The writting on this show sucks big time..they should have just stuck with the original UK storylines and be done with it..but the US version is beyond boring..I nearly wish they would cancell it. And one more thing Joss storyline WTF is that the original with Ana Torv wasso adorable but this is just crap!!!

  10. the girl says:

    I completely lost it during one whole commercial break this episode. I couldn’t believe Karen had the nerve to tell her lawyer that she didn’t want to violate her ethics… ELEVEN EPISODES TOO LATE. I wish Karen had been so ethical before she slept with her patient. Perhaps she should have considered her ethics before writing a prescription for a lethal dose of morphine. Maybe her ethics would have stopped her from discussing her patient with his wife and son… LIKE SAVI TOLD HER TO. Where were her ethics when she deleted her notes, and then rewrote them based on instructions from her lover’s widow? And what about her ethics when she lied to the investigator? She definitely should have considered her ethics before sleeping with her dead lover’s son, and there is no way her ethics advised her to use him as her alibi. There have been fifty-leven things this woman has done to prove she HAS NO ETHICS but now you don’t want to lie about your alibi? Seriously? The LEAST deleterious thing you could do, but no, now all of a sudden, you have ethics. I can’t with Karen. I really can’t.

  11. SK says:

    I, too, miss your “over 1000 words” recap. It’s so funny! I always look forward to it the day after I watch the show. Hopefully, next week? ;)

  12. Iakovos says:

    I do enjoy MISTRESSES but if ABC says yes to a second season (and I hope it does), I want some changes. I’d like a brisker pace and a little lighter tone. And how can such savvy (yes, i used the pun) women make such bad choices. I realize that is the story but I find it difficult to care and root for this quartet at times because of the stupidity, particularly Karen. She, especially, seems beyond redemption. And April, so pretty, allows her ex-husband to escape after faking his death. Is that not a crime, and she is now complicit?!?! Joss is a mess with her heart and my favorite, although I loke Savi, too. I just wish her story was more compelling and was slower to catch fire. The trouble with Harry seemed to forced at the start and I still cannot fathom their separation. Yes, I know the fertility issues affected them, and her career, but… I would have liked to see that build before the affair and pregnancy. Savi would have more impact.

  13. Kathryn says:

    I personally thought Karen telling the truth about everything at the deposition was the one smart decision she’s made all season. Obviously she’s going to pay the price for it, but lying and inevitably getting caught would have been much worse.