Golden Globes 2013: We're Live-Blogging 'Em!

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fey poehler golden globesDo not adjust your dial. That recurring fantasy you’ve had about Tina Fey and Amy Poehler hosting a major network awards show — the one that you have every time the duo gets behind a podium together — has finally come true. Welcome to the Golden Globes 2013, a place where there’ll (hopefully) be lizzing without judgment and not a single blerg in sight.

Will Fey & Poehler live up to the hype (and the extra jaunty promos)? Well, I’ll certainly be rooting for the funny ladies as I live-blog the telecast from the opening moments till the final statuette/slurred acceptance speech. So let the festivities begin, but before they do, a couple of questions for us all to answer:

Who are you wearing? (Me: Old Navy.) What are you sipping? (Diet Coke, though a bottle of Momo sauv blanc is on deck.) And what’s your snack of choice? (Baked brie with a melange of nuts and seeds and brown sugar.)

Okay, ready, set, let’s live blog!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20138:04 PM

Thanks for hanging with me tonight, TVLine readers! Please come back to TVLine tonight and tomorrow for a full rundown of interviews with Golden Globes’ big TV winners, galleries of Best and Worst moments, answers to your burning questions and more! And for up-to-the-minute alerts when all this good stuff posts, follow us on Twitter @TVLineNews.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20138:00 PM

“We’re going home with Jodie Foster!” says Amy Poehler, wrapping up the show.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:59 PM

Jack Bristow!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:58 PM

Best Motion Picture Drama goes to…Argo!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:57 PM

We’re in the homestretch now…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:53 PM

Daniel Day-Lewis paying for those dramatic pauses now as the orchestra plays him off…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:52 PM

Best Actor in a Motion Picture Drama goes to Daniel Day-Lewis for The Expendables 2 (or, rather, Lincoln).

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:51 PM

Nice shout-out from Chastain to her director Kathryn Bigelow.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:48 PM

Best Actress in a Motion Picture Drama goes to Jessica Chastain for Zero Dark Thirty.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:48 PM

“This next presenter is so good looking, he makes young George Clooney look like garbage.”–Tina Fey

“Please welcome middle-aged George Clooney!” –Amy Poehler

(These two are amazing.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:45 PM

Also, was Fellner’s “Gee, we gotta wrap up already?” a subtle dig at the Lady Hathaway?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:44 PM

Will Anne Hathaway annoyingly hijacking the mic from producer Eric Fellner hurt her Oscar chances? Discuss!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:42 PM

Comedy or Musical…feh!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:42 PM

(Doesn’t it seem like Golden Globes should be split by Comedy or Drama? And then the musicals could fall into one side or the other depending on whether or not they’re funny?)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:40 PM

Best Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical goes to…Les Miserables!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:37 PM

And the Golden Globe for Best Ad Chyron goes to L’oreal: “Beyoncé is c6 soft sable.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:34 PM

Hugh forgives the person who stole his bike tires when he auditioned for Les Mis; says he’ll leave the frame in the same spot come Monday morning.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:33 PM

(I always get nervous that I’m gonna misspell Les Miserables. It’s not just me with French word-phobia, right?)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:32 PM

Best Actor in a Motion Picture Comedy or Musical goes to Hugh Jackman in Les Miserables!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:26 PM

“It took a village to raise this very demented child.” –Lena Dunham, who also thanks Chad Lowe (apparently because Hilary Swank never did)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:24 PM

Best TV Series, Musical or Comedy goes to Girls. (Which I wish wasn’t premiereing till next week, y’know? Thanks, HBO. Waah waah waah.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:21 PM

Totally shallow moment: Ben Affleck really does rock a beard. Also: SYDNEY BRISTOW IN DA HOUSE!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:19 PM

This might help make up for the Oscar snub.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:18 PM

Best Director, Motion Picture goes to…Ben Affleck, Argo!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:17 PM

That was quite possibly the best public coming-out speech I’ve heard, and yet at the same time it feels dismissive to label it merely as a coming-out speech. That was Jodie Foster telling us who she is and who she wants to be. A great TV moment.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:13 PM

Wowza. She is not Honey Boo Boo Child.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:09 PM

I can’t even pick a quote from this Jodie Foster speech.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:06 PM

Golden Globes confession: I saw Flight Plan, but I don’t remember a damn thing about it. #SauvBlanc

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:04 PM

“I’m OK to go” happens to be one of my favorite movie lines from one of my favorite movies ever. #Contact

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:03 PM

Another unedited quote from the hubby, following Downey’s list of Foster’s credits: “And now she’s sitting next to Mel Gibson.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:02 PM

Loopy Robert Downey Jr. presenting Jodie Foster with her Cecil B. DeMille award.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20137:00 PM

“Congratulations, Lena. I’m glad we all got you through middle school. MIDDLE SCHOOL?” –Tina Fey

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:59 PM

“Everybody’s gettin’ a little loose now that we’re all losers.” –Amy Poehler, clutchig a cocktail

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:57 PM

Jodie Foster about to get the Cecil B. DeMille Award. Which makes me raise the question: How many times a week do you reckon you quote/reference The Silence of the Lambs?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:56 PM

Lena was believably/charmingly nervous, which is a mood that can often go awry in a televised acceptance speech.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:54 PM

“This award is for every woman who ever felt like there wasn’t a space for her. This show’s made a space for me.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:52 PM

And the winner is Lena Dunham for Girls!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:52 PM

Who had the funnier cameo: J.Lo or George Clooney? (And no, I am not being facetious.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:51 PM

I kinda love every nominee in this category.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:51 PM

It’s time for Best Actress in a TV Comedy or Musical…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:49 PM

I’m just gonna say, I would not do well shipwrecked with a BENGAL FREAKING TIGER.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:47 PM

And the Golden Globe goes to Brave.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:46 PM

We didn’t need an Anne Hathaway upskirt “joke” in the intro to Best Animated Feature Film, did we?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:45 PM

Sacha Baron Cohen trying a little too hard up in here.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:43 PM

Holey crikey the ads for MAMA freak me the eff out.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:42 PM

Needs more Poehler-Fey, please. Thank you.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:40 PM

Claire says she’s “very proud to be working in this medium, in this moment, in this company.” Amen, sister!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:38 PM

She so so so deserves it, and yet I wish Julianna Margulies could win in an alternate universe.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:37 PM

Best Actress in a TV Drama goes to Claire Danes in Homeland.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:37 PM

Lea Michele working those gams!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:35 PM

The winner is Amour.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:34 PM

Time for Best Foreign Language Film…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:34 PM

Oh dear.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:34 PM

Will Sly and Arnie do a comedy bit?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:33 PM

Okay, we’re 90 minutes in, and I have to say the pacing of the 2013 Golden Globes remains excellent.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:28 PM

Best Actor in a TV Comedy or Musical goes to…Don Cheadle in House of Lies. Well, Salma Hayek is certainly excited.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:27 PM

Lucy Liu. (My girl Drew. Cameron D and Destiny.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:26 PM

If you can be charmingly douchey, Tarantino just succeeded…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:25 PM

Quentin thanks his groups of friends to whom he reads scenes from his movies: “I don’t want input. I don’t want you to tell me if I’m doing anything wrong. Heaven forbid!”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:24 PM

Best Motion Picture Screenplay goes to Quentin Tarantino for Django Unchained.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:19 PM

Anne drops the word “blerg” to begin her speech (30 Rock fan!), then thanks the HFPA for providing her with a lovely blunt object that she’ll use as a weapon against self-doubt.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:17 PM

Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture goes to Anne Hathaway fror Les Miserables.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:15 PM

That Megan Fox-Jonah Hill bit just didn’t work, as Amy Adam’s befuddled facial expression so clearly expressed.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:13 PM

(It’s not wrong I wanted Max Greenfield to win, right?)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:13 PM

The Golden Globes goes to Ed Harris for Game Change.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:12 PM

Best Supporting Actor in a TV Series, Miniseries or Movie (AGAIN why isn’t this three or four different awards????)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:07 PM

“Harvey, thank you for killing whoever you had to kill to get me up here today.” (NOW they’re laughing.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:07 PM

“Today I beat Meryl!” (Note audience a little afraid to laugh.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:06 PM

The Golden Globe goes to Jennifer Lawrence for Silver Linings Playbook.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:06 PM

Ladies and gentlemen, we have our 2014 Golden Globes hosts (should Poehler and Fey want the year off).

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:05 PM

Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell are a giidy delight ad-libbing ridiculata about the nominees to introduce this category. Re. Judi Dench: “She used to be a police officer…”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:03 PM

Time for Best Actress in a Musical or Comedy….

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:03 PM

“That was Bill Rodham Clinton!” –Tina Fey

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:02 PM

“That was Hillary Clinton’s husband!” –Amy Poehler

Michael Slezak January 13, 20136:02 PM

Clinton there to introduce “Lincoln,” but also clearly wanting to remind viewers about “necessary compromise” that makes our country great.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:59 PM

President Bill Clinton!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:58 PM

Nice speech from Kevin Costner. I wasn’t sure where he was going, but I liked where he got to.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:57 PM

Kevin Costner wins for Hatfields & McCoys, but damn Jamie Francisco was robbed.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:56 PM

“As a professional volleyball player battling restless leg syndrome…Jamie Francisco in ‘Dog President.’”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:55 PM

Best Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries….

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:54 PM

By the bye, Adele won the night when she high-fived Daniel Craig.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:51 PM

Adele, confirming her awesomeness, says she was just taking the opportunity for a night out with her friend Ida, and now she’s a Golden Globe winner. “We’ve been pissing ourselves laughing all night.” Us too!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:50 PM

And the Golden Globe goes to “Skyfall”!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:48 PM

If this doesn’t go to Adele, I’m gonna pop off.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:48 PM

“These are all amazing artists,” says J.Lo, introducig the nominees for Best Original Song, Motion Picture. Too bad she killed the term “amazing artist” during Jacob Lusk’s reign of terror on Season 10 of Idol.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:47 PM

Dang! He wasn’t exaggerating about his beautiful wife, was he?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:46 PM

And the award for Best Original Score in a Motion Picture goes to Mychael Danna for Life of Pi.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:45 PM

(OK, I’ll stop.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:45 PM

“Kohl’s spokesperson Jenny from the Block…”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:45 PM

“Gigli star Jennifer Lopez…”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:44 PM

Former American Idol judge Jennifer Lopez…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:43 PM

Real life CIA agent Tony Mendez joins John Goodman to introduce Argo. Very cool. It’s a pity they didn’t give him a little boost in the audio department, though.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:40 PM

Alex Gansa dropping some character-death intel for those of you who aren’t up to date on Season 2, and not even a “spoiler alert” to kick off his speech.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:38 PM

Claire’s amazing red dress really stands out in that sea of black tuxes and dresses, no?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:37 PM

The Golden Globe goes to…Homeland!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:36 PM

That’d be Best TV Drama, BTW.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:36 PM

Whoops, teleprompter malfunction for Paul Rudd and Salma… “Something about the best…uhhh.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:35 PM

Damian surmises his mom is up in heaven telling everyone “how well my son is doing in acting.” Sweet.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:34 PM

The Homeland theme needs Claire Danes’ paranoid dialogue in the background.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:33 PM

And the Golden Globe goes to Damian Lewis for Homeland! (WHAT WHAT?!)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:33 PM

Time for Best Actor in a TV Series, Drama…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:32 PM

I think we need Salma Hayek on TV every week. Who’s with me?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:29 PM

“HFPA president and world-class archer…” didn’t even crack a smile at that intro? Come ON!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:27 PM

The pace of this show is fantastic. Now let’s hope it can continue for the next 2 1/2 hrs.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:26 PM

Thanks to my pal Kim Roots for catching the exact intro to Poehler’s bit: “As a psychic who solves her own murder, Darcy St. Budge, ‘Dog President.’”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:25 PM

They needed to cut to Mandy Patinkin after Catherine Zeta-Jones sang her intro to Les Mis.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:24 PM

And the real Julianne Moore takes the stage to accept the trophy.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:24 PM

Julianne Moore wins!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:23 PM

OMG, Amy Poehler sitting in for Julianne Moore as they announce the nominees for Best Actress in a TV Movie…her teeth almost made me miss Taylor Swift and Arnie in the background…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:22 PM

Game Change’s Jay Roach thanks his “muse, friend, lover and Jewish rock angel Susanna Hoffs.” (I must take this moment to implore everyone to check out her awesome solo work. That is all.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:19 PM

Somebody just got bleeped. (Or there was some weird audio glitch.) (Probs not.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:19 PM

Way to cut to Political Animals’ Carla Gugino.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:18 PM

And the Golden Globe goes to Game Change.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:18 PM

Time for Best TV Movie…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:18 PM

Unedited comment from my hubby: “You can’t say ‘philanthropist’ and then have a 12-year-old walk out on stage.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:13 PM

I was secretly rooting for Hayden Panettiere for Nashville. (And not just because “Wrong Song” is my current jam.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:12 PM

Maggie Smith wins for Downton Abbey.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:12 PM

Best Supporting Actress in a TV Series/Miniseries/Movie (aka, time to split this into three or four categories HFPA)…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:11 PM

I’m not gonna lie to you: Every time they show Quentin Tarantino tonight I’m going to think of Tina Fey saying he’s the star of all her sexual nightmares.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:10 PM

And the winner is Christoph Waltz in Django Unchained.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:09 PM

And now it’s time for Best Suppoting Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:08 PM

(Yes that was Laurie Keller style.)

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:07 PM

WHAT WHAT?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:07 PM

Can I get a “What What?” if these two are cracking you guys up?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:07 PM

Tina’s zinger about James Franco’s Oscar hosting performance: Funniest joke of the night, at least until our hosts discuss Meryl Streep staying home because of the flu: “And I hear she’s amazing in it.”

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:04 PM

How come this is the first time I’ve heard an HFPA-HPV joke?

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:03 PM

“When it comes to torture, I trust the lady who spent three years married to James Cameron.” Yowza!! I thought Amy Poehler said she wasn’t going to be edgy!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:01 PM

Tina and Amy in green and red. Clearly the subtle message is Christmas in January!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20135:00 PM

“Everybody’s in a good mood!” says Savannah Guthrie, clearly not speaking about the producer sternly counting down to the start of the telecast.

Michael Slezak January 13, 20134:58 PM

Just a housekeeping note, new blog comments will appear at the top of the page. (Although that’s gonna be kinda obvs after like three minutes. But anyway…

Michael Slezak January 13, 20134:56 PM

After 30 seconds of NBC red carpet, I have to say I think I’m glad I watched that motley crew on E!

Michael Slezak January 13, 20134:55 PM

Hey, is this thing on?



Comments (69)

  • Good for Jodie.

    Comment by Cathy – January 13, 2013 07:09 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • So Jodie Fosters speech… brought to you by Damon LIndelof… Asks more questions than answers

    Comment by Craig – January 13, 2013 07:14 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • It really sucks that Affleck wasn’t nominated for the Oscar.

    Comment by Ann V. – January 13, 2013 07:18 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • Girls winning best comedy would have been a really good moment if it hadn’t been ruined by being presented by that d-bag Jay Leno. But yay for Girls!

    Comment by Britta Unfiltered – January 13, 2013 07:24 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • Bradley Cooper got robbed.

    Comment by Britta Unfiltered – January 13, 2013 07:37 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • Want to know what Jeremy Renner said.

    Comment by Cathy – January 13, 2013 07:42 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • When I saw Les Mis, the theatre was so rapt that you could hear a pin drop.

    Comment by Ann V. – January 13, 2013 07:43 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
    • Same here. I don’t actually think I can recall having been in an audience that rapt before. Especially during that one scene, never mind a pin, you could’ve heard a spec of dust land on a piece of felt. And then at the end the theater erupted into loud applause.
      So much for all the the critics and and they ways in which they ‘knew’ how audiences would react.

      Comment by HitTheGroundRunningWonderlandHaleyOhMy – January 13, 2013 09:33 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • re: “Will Anne Hathaway annoyingly hijacking the mic from producer Eric Fellner hurt her Oscar chances? Discuss!”

    No. She was that good. lol

    Comment by me – January 13, 2013 07:46 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • I thought that was so rude of Anne Hathaway to interrupt her producer’s speech like that. He didn’t seem happy about it, did he? She pulled a Kanye just to thank her agent. Crappy move, Hathaway.

    Comment by Britta Unfiltered – January 13, 2013 07:48 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
    • Some can argue that it was “rude” to forget her agent. Can’t please anyone. Regardless, she “stole” 3 seconds, people calm down. lol

      Comment by me – January 13, 2013 07:50 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
    • Not exactly a Kanye, heck she was part of the winning production. Yeah maybe it was a touch awkward but she meant well enough.

      Comment by HitTheGroundRunningWonderlandHaleyOhMy – January 13, 2013 09:37 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • Well I’m a good luck charm because Argo is the only nominee I’ve seen

    Comment by Rochelle – January 13, 2013 07:59 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • This live blog = 100 times better than the way EW does it. I was thoroughly entertained.

    Comment by Did he really just quote a Destiny Child's song? Bless. – January 14, 2013 12:13 AM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • People are trashing it because it’s the worst series of all time. The poor critics started out so confused by its awfulness they praised it, and now they are stuck defending themselves praising this garbage over and over.

    Comment by Jill – January 13, 2013 07:30 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • I’ve said it before, and I say it again.
    Once you get it, you don’t disrespect it. Everytime someone trashes Girls it’s just ridiculous because everyone that gets it, knows how amazing of a show it is and how brilliant Lena Dunham is.

    Comment by Gabe – January 13, 2013 07:45 PM PDT  Reply To This Post
  • Someday we’ll all be privileged enough to “get it”, I hope. God forbid someone has different tastes.

    Comment by Sue Me – January 14, 2013 01:08 AM PDT  Reply To This Post

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