The TVLine-Up: Your Guide to 81 Christmas Marathons and Specials

FRIDAY, DEC. 23
Parental Control (MTV, 3 – 10 am) | Visions of appalling future sons- and daughters-in-law dancing in their heads, Mom and Dad try to get rid of their kids’ loser “better halves” by setting up blind dates for their offspring.

How It’s Made (Science Channel, 6 am – Saturday, 6 am) | Ever wonder how pipes are made? How about luxury cars? And anything else under the sun? Find out during this marathon that has everything going for it but a Michael Westen voiceover.

The Millionaire Matchmaker (Bravo, 6 am – 3:30 pm) | Because you’re sure to feel better about the fact that you have no one to kiss under the mistletoe once you realize that sometimes, neither do the filthy rich. Um, right?

Ghost Adventures (Travel Channel, 9 am – 10 pm) | Maybe, as you visit the most haunted places in the world, you’ll bump into the Ghost of Christmas Past. Or Future. Or not.

Gold Rush (Discovery Channel, 9 am – 10:01 pm) | Mind you, there’ll be no skimping on holiday presents if you strike gold!

My Strange Addiction (OWN, 9 am – 6 pm) | Yes, the one about the woman who eats toilet paper is included.

Gangland (Spike TV, 9:33 am – 9:18 pm) | Celebrate the holidays with America’s most notorious street gangs… if you dare.

America’s Next Top Model (Style Network, 11 am – 11 pm) | Paulina Porizkova, you are missed.

It Only Hurts When I Laugh (truTV, 11 am – 5 pm) | If America’s Funniest Home Videos aren’t enough for you, perhaps you’ll enjoy these home videos. Although technically, they’re not guaranteed to be “America’s funniest.”

Roseanne (Oxygen, 11 am – 5:30 pm) | And those bitches on Wisteria Lane think they’re Desperate Housewives. (Also airs Saturday, 10:30 am – 6 pm.)

Elmo’s Movie Merry-Thon (Sprout, 1 – 5:28 pm) | Sit the kids down in front of the tube for a holiday movie marathon — sorry, that’s merry-thon — hosted by Elmo and featuring Caillou’s Holiday Movie, Bob the Builder: Snowed Under, Barney’s Christmas Star and Elmo’s World: Happy Holidays. What, no Showgirls, then?

Say Yes to the Dress (TLC, 3 pm – 10 pm) | Future brides spending extravagant amounts of money on wedding dresses should make you feel better about all the dough you spent this year on reindeer sweaters.

Christmas Thrillers (TCM, 8 pm – Saturday, 5:30 am) | TCM goes for the jugular — sometimes literally — this Christmas with the thrillers Backfire, Lady in the Lake, Murder, My Sweet, Christmas Evil (aka You Better Watch Out) and New Year’s Evil.

Jeff Dunham’s Very Special Christmas Special (Comedy Central, 8 – 9:01 pm) | Comedy Central reheats the funnyman’s 2008 special, which features original carols like “Jingle Bombs.”

Noah’s Arc (Logo, 8 pm – Saturday, 12:30 am) | It’s Sex and the City for guys. Only the guys are gay. And the city is L.A.

Olive, the Other Reindeer (The CW, 8 – 9 pm) | Too cute: When Blitzen gets injured, Olive the dog wants to step in and help deliver presents.

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer (The CW, 9 –10 pm) | In this animated special that brings to life the popular song, a young boy sets out to track down his missing maw-maw on Christmas Eve and prove that Santa is real.

PROCEED TO NEXT PAGE (CLICK BELOW) FOR SATURDAY’s HIGHLIGHTS

Comments are monitored, so don’t go off topic, don’t frakkin’ curse and don’t bore us with how much your coworker’s sister-in-law makes per hour. Talk smart about TV!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

28 Comments
  1. Templar says:

    So, pretty much no reason to even turn the TV on then. With the exceptions of Downton Abbey and Little Dorrit, there isn’t much for me to DVR. Leaving for London tonight, so will set the DVR for those two shows.

  2. Chelsea says:

    The Disney Parade is 12-2 on the East coast. ABC

  3. David says:

    Doesn’t look like there’s any good marathons on Christmas Day. Bummer.

  4. Juliana says:

    Everyone should watch Awkward, seriously.

  5. No Buffy this holiday?? WTH?! :(

  6. Lisa says:

    I’ll have to watch Buffy I taped on LOGO this morning. Will catch the Doctor Who Christmas, Firefly and Merlin marathons.

  7. ggny says:

    Doctor Who, The Nerdist special and The OC i will be catching and maybe some Firefly

  8. ggny says:

    btw people that dont know The Nerdist special after Doctor Who Christmas special will have Will Weaton,Nathan Fillion,Simon Pegg and David Tennant as special guest…So if you a nerd like me you should probably check it out

  9. TJCrinc says:

    whatever happened to james bond films being played all month. i miss that.

  10. Amber says:

    I’m all over that “Noah’s Arc” marathon on logo. Love that show so much. It’s one of those that got cancelled way too soon.

  11. Bad Breaker says:

    Any news of a Sons of Ararchy, Justified and Vampire Diaries marathons?

  12. Sheila says:

    Being Human premieres on 1/16…not 1/17.

  13. Ali says:

    Doctor Who, Downton Abbey and The Nerdist…that’s a must. With some Top Gear on the side.

  14. Red Rider says:

    Is TBS not doing the 24 Hours of A Christmas Story like they have for the last decade? I didn’t see it on the list. That would really suck.

  15. Mike says:

    This list is correct the best OC Christmas episodes were Season’s 1 and 4

  16. Tia says:

    Science Channel it is.

  17. david says:

    Yes TBS is doing 24 hours of A Christmas Story from 8 pm on Christmas Eve to 8 pm on Christmas night. It has been doing that for 14 years now.

  18. dee says:

    There has to be a Criminal Minds marathon SOMEWHERE!

  19. Steve says:

    For a more complete list check out this huge schedule/viewing guide
    of CHRISTMAS ON TV: 2,320 Specials, Episodes, Movies & Marathons for December 2011.

    http://www.tvtango.com/news/detail/id/411

    Happy Holidays!

  20. Caitlin says:

    FIREFLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  21. John F. C. Taylor says:

    One Christmas marathon that I absolutely hate is A Christmas Story. Never cared for the movie and think 24 hours of it is a waste of TV time. I would suggest that if they want to have a Christmas marathon that they assemble as many versions of A Christmas Carol as will fit in 24 and run that.

  22. Dole says:

    UGH I WANT TO WATCH BAND OF BROTHERS SO BADLY. But I’m overseas with no DVRing capabilities or anything. Grrrrr I have been wanting to see that for ages. :(

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 3,004 other followers