Castle Gets 'Cuffed': We Unlock the Best Quotes

If you’ve watched the “Cuffed” episode of ABC’s Castle, you now know why Stana Katic used words such as “cute,” “adorable” and “lighter” to tout the script by series boss Andrew W. Marlowe and writer/producer Terri Edda Miller. Because while the hour offered an interesting — and at times tense — mystery, it was the crisp, fun banter that truly took the spotlight.

We tallied the best of the soundbites.

‘Caskett’ discuss the romantic tension between… well, let’s pretend it’s Esposito and Lanie
Beckett: They both want to be together, but neither want to admit to it.
Castle: Ugh, why do people do that to themselves?
Beckett: Maybe they just don’t see it.
Castle: How could they not, it’s so obvious.

Castle seeks an old-school solution to a modern problem
Beckett: What is this, the 1940s? These are my police cuffs, you’re not going to open them with a bobby pin.

Beckett, bent over, backs into Castle… to help move a heavy chest
Beckett: You better not be enjoying this, Castle.
Castle: I’ll let you know in a minute.

Castle tires of his better half’s squawking
Castle: You would have made a terrible conjoined twin.

Beckett invites Castle to fantasize all he wants after their crisis is solved
Castle: It’s not as much fun if I have your permission.

Finally, someone voices the great mystery about Kate’s impractical heels
Castle: How do you run in these things?

To escape the cuffs, Castle “cuts” to the chase and suggests the 127 Hours solution
Beckett: My hand? Why my hand?
Castle: It’s smaller.

Suspecting they’re new product for a human-trafficking ring…
Castle: I’m a best-selling author! I wonder what I’d be worth.

After Kate (and those mad, stacked heels) help bust through a wall
Castle: I always liked your legs, but now I respect them.

A gun-toting baddie leaves Esposito and Ryan to trade glances, wondering who it was she meant
Woman: Maybe I’ll shoot the pretty one first….

Beckett announces her resolve to elude the big cat on their tail
Beckett: I did not survive a bullet to the heart to die as tiger kibble!

Esposito and Ryan ask Castle about his and Beckett’s predator
How was that tiger? Was it gr-r-r-reat?

As for whether “Cuffed” brought Rick and Kate closer than ever, intimately as well as physically….
Castle: If I ever have to be hitched to someone, it would be you.
Beckett: For what it’s worth, if I ever have to spend another night handcuffed to someone, I wouldn’t mind if it was you…. But next time, let’s do it without the tiger.
Castle: [After a double-take, his interest piqued] “Next time”…?

Did “Cuffed” satisfy your expectations for Rick and Kate in close quarters?