Coming to your screen this week: Eight premieres (including Project Runway Season 9 and the return of ThunderCats), two season finales, beloved guest stars galore, and the arrival of Shark Week! As a supplement to the fresh features and reporting TVLine has coming your way, here are 37 programs to keep on your radar.
MONDAY, JULY 25
8/7c Eureka (Syfy) | Geek out! Both Wil Wheaton and Stan Lee guest star this week.
8 pm How I Met Your Mother (CBS) | Did you know Robin Sparkles once hosted a kiddie space show?
9 pm Law & Order: Criminal Intent (NBC) | This is the one that riffs on Broadway’s Spider-Man disastercal. Cynthia Nixon makes like Julie Taymor.
9 pm Hoarders (A&E) | This guy hoards paper and keeps his gas stove on all the time? Is there a Rescue Me crossover coming?
9 pm Switched at Birth (ABC Family) | Regina shares her secret — that she knew about the switcheroo! How happy is ABC Family that she kept it under wraps this whole time?
9 pm The Closer (TNT) | Fans of Tony Dennison and G.W. Bailey are well-served this week, as Flynn and Provenza embark on another ill-advised side line of work.
9 pm Warehouse 13 (Syfy) | Bionic woman Lyndsay Wagner returns as Dr. Vanessa Calder, while a (ahem) “mystery” lands Pete and Myka in bed together.
10 pm Rizzoli & Isles (TNT) | Who ya gonna call when you need to cast Frost’s dad? Ernie Hud-son!
TUESDAY, JULY 26
8 pm Pretty Little Liars (ABC Family) | Emily’s feeling homesick after moving. Why, not enough illicit goings-on, kiddo?
9 pm Deadliest Catch (Discovery) | In the season finale, the Cornelia Marie returns home, facing an uncertain future. (Psst, guys, you got renewed for Season 8 months ago.)
9 pm White Collar (USA Network) | Sharif Atkins finally gets his due when Jones gets out of the van… and promptly gets pwned by a masked man. Spoiler alert, ladies: Watch for Sharif in his dress whites.
10 pm HawthoRNe (TNT) | No longer an associate of a certain Human Target, Chi McBride pops up as the interim COO of James River Hospital.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 27
8 pm So You Think You Can Dance (Fox) | The Top 8 compete, with elimination night airing Thursday at 8.
8 pm Big Brother (CBS) | Is it true? The poor man’s Olivia Wilde is gone? :(
8 pm The Middle (ABC) | This Valentine’s themed repeat finds Sue looking for a boy she locked lips with, and Mike accidentally letting slip Brick’s crush on a classmate.
9 pm Royal Pains (USA Network) | Evan learns the real reason why grandpa Ed Asner hasn’t been a part of his life.
9 pm Franklin & Bash (TNT) | “I don’t wanna wait/for our lives to be over….” James Van Der Beek guest-stars as Janie’s fiance.
9 pm Modern Family (ABC) | Phil and Claire trade “good cop, bad cop” roles for a day, with very amusing results. (This is a repeat! That’s right, the fall season has not started just yet!)
10 pm Rescue Me (FX) | Tommy opens up to Kelly, while the boys urge Lou to diet.
THURSDAY, JULY 28
8 pm Wipeout (ABC) | This week’s theme is boss/employee teams — alas, too late for Chuck Lorre and Charlie Sheen to make a go at the big red balls.
8 pm Community (NBC) | It’s D&D night, meaning Annie is heretofore Hector the well-endowed.
9 pm Project Runway (Lifetime) | Season 9, and Heidi’s still lookin’ fine.
9 pm Black Tide: Voices from the Gulf (Animal Planet) | This two-hour special looks at the 2010 Gulf oil spill and how it affected lives, business and the ecosystem.
9 pm Burn Notice (USA Network) | Sam goes undercover with a heroin dealer, but soon run afoul of CIA protocol. Beloved* Grey’s Anatomy alumna Lauren Stamile guest stars. (*I say that to taunt.)
10 pm Rookie Blue (ABC) | Beloved NCIS alumna Lauren Holly shows up as Gail’s mother, Superintendent Peck.
10 pm Suits (USA Network) | Beloved Cold Case alumna Tracie Thoms guest stars. (I have much belove to spread this morning!)
10 pm Louie (FX) | It’s Louie vs. the subway! Let’s hope they spare us the stereotypical graffiti.
FRIDAY, JULY 29
8 pm ThunderCats (Cartoon Network) | The good: ThunderCats is back! The meh: Only Entourage beauty Emmanuelle Chriqui’s voice is on display, as Cheetara.
10 pm Torchwood: Miracle Day (Starz) | Road trip! Destination: Los Angeles.
10 pm Haven (Syfy) | The town’s docks start attacking people…? Meanwhile, Audrey II looks into Audrey I’s identity(s) crisis.
11 pm Wolverine/Iron Man (G4) | The two new anime incarnations debut, back-to-back.
SATURDAY, JULY 30
9 pm Age of Dragons (Syfy) | This TV-movie stars Danny Glover — not too old for this s–t, apparently — as an Ahab-like adventurer on quest to slay a mighty fire-breather.
11:30 pm Friday Night Dinner (BBC America) | The BBC sitcom makes its Stateside debut. Don’t make the mistake I made, thinking it has anything to do with Friday Night Lights.
SUNDAY, JULY 31
9 pm True Blood (HBO) | Sookie hunts for Jason during a full moon, which to me just sounds like a questionable idea.
9 pm The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All (ABC) | The main theme being, “Whew, dodged that bullet”…?
9 pm Great White Invasion (Discovery) | The cabler’s annual Shark Week kicks off with this hour-long look at Jaws sightings.
10 pm Breaking Bad (AMC) | The partying at Jesse’s place start to get out of control. I’m sorry — start to?!
10 pm Against the Wall (Lifetime) | This new series stars Aussie looker Rachael Carpani as an Internal Affairs cop in Chicago. I do not know what the “twist” is, if any.
10 pm The Real L Word (Showtime) | The season finale finds Romi grappling with her feelings for Whitney, whose San Fran honey is about to hit town. Meanwhile, Kacy and Cory contemplate using the insemination gizmo they got from Alyssa — though I’m pretty sure a male will at some point need to be involved.
Which of the above is must-see TV for you? And by all means, hit the comments to politely share tune-in recommendations of your own.